A/N: Just as a warning, my beta, bless her, is currently being harassed by real life, so I decided to give her a break, and in turn this is not edited. As for the lateness... well there are many reasons . , but doubt you guys care, lol. And Finally, this chapter gets a bit graphic... o.o I don't know why I did that to myself since I actually don't handle violence very well. Anyway, read at your own risk!

I am a Winchester

Summary: When Sam was seven years old, he was separated from his family and adopted three years later. His life isn't the normal that he thought it would be, and at sixteen he runs away only to be dropped off at the Roadhouse.

His heart beated harshly against his throat, each thump screaming for a reaction from it's frozen host. Things became crystal clear and blurred within a instant as comprehension streamed though his body. Somehow within the short time he had lost Sammy, Harry had already been able to get him back. White cold pierced him, and at a distance he heard a low a rumbling growl. He was going to kill that…

Vaguely he realized that it wasn't the smartest thing in the world to pull a gun on the sheriff of a town, no matter how small it was. Especially to get information that could have been possibly leaked out of the said man. Dean however, didn't care about any of these things. Fire was in his eyes and death in his veins. Someone was trying to hurt his brother.


Sam felt like a mouse, his heart was pounding in terror at every jolt of the car. His eyes remained focused on Harry without hope, watching for attack. Mom and Dad were up front, silent, they knew what would be coming as soon as the adoptive brothers were alone. Sam hunched into his form even more. It wouldn't have been so bad if he hadn't gotten used to it. If he hadn't found Dean at that bar and started to feel safe for the first time in so so long. Now as Sam watched Harry sit innocently in his seat, it was like starting all over again. The slow break down that the older boy had delighted in so much. No, it was even worse then that, because Sam knew what to expect.

Slowly Harry gaze drew away from the window and met Sam's own with a smirk. "What's wrong Sammy, are you are sick?" Said in sickly sarcastic humor. "Maybe we should stop the car for you, uh? Hey, dad!"

Sam eyes widened frantically, there was no one around for miles except cows. No chance of witnesses. "No! I mean, no, I'm fine just a headache I swear…" A hungry grin met Sammy's reply. "Really dad, I think that we should stop."

The car began to slow down and glide to a stop until Sam finally felt the final jolt that felt like doom to him. There was no plan for this, no mentality that he had built up in anticipation. The hope that Dean would somehow find him had destroyed that, and even that Sam knew was crumbling. Harry was grinning madly as he pulled Sam from the car. Anyone out side of their twisted family would have thought that the older was simply a teasing brother, helping the younger out.

Their parents remained tightly shut within the rented van. Sam cursed them in his mind. They knew what was happening, but did nothing to stop it, had even helped Harry find him again. Sick hurt ran through him, why didn't they love him enough to safe him? Didn't they have some small obligation to his safety or happiness? The crunch of gravel echoed through Sam's ears as Harry tugged him down the road slightly before crossing into the dry grass. There was a moment when as the other crossed a bent down wire fence that Sam thought to tear away from Harry's solid grip on his arm and run… Only that run would be false, always within Harry's reach. Sam didn't run.

They walked for a little more then ten minutes, until they were out of the sight of the road. For a moment things paused as Harry studied him closely, and Sam's eyes slowly dried. "Seems as good of place as any, uh?" There wasn't any response.

Harry took a step closer to Sam, his firm grasp never relenting. Sam tried to take a step back, only to be jerked forward. The older bent slightly and whispered softly in Sam's ear, "You've been very bad Sammy, running away…" He paused. "I didn't even mind that so much you know. Was fun in a way, a game even." Sam was shaking down, his breath coming shallow and fast as he stared into open fields of nothing. "If it had just been that you know… I might have gone easy on you. Just given you a good beating, uh? And gotten it over with?" Harry suddenly released his arm, letting the blood tingle back into the numb limb. "But that's not all I am going to do Sammy, not this time."

Within second the force of the push at sent Sam to the ground and scrambling. Harry was long anticipating this though, A couple hits to the head dazed the younger boy in no time. The brutal hits there after, that just kept coming, never tiring never melted into one another for Sam. Each one was felt with the brutality that it was meant. Until finally Sam was curled into a sobbing mass. That of course was when Harry took out his knife. It didn't go unnoticed from Sam, but instead he let his eyes glaze, and become sucked into the seconds before it was brought down upon his skin.

He remembered when Harry had first used the knife. Earlier that week Harry had brought home a stray dog that had been wandering around the park. It was obviously hungry and had immediately followed the scent of hotdog that had lured it in. Almost immediately after the strange mix of germen shepherd and golden retriever had gotten to their home, it had been taken into the basement never to see daylight again.

Sam hadn't been used to the countless animals that Harry had tortured and killed back then. Not realizing that each and everyone of them had protected him for just a little longer from his adoptive brother's wrath. So instead of staying far away from that basement room, Sam had gone in attempt to save the simple loving beast. When he made the final step down the dark stairs though, what was left was only a husk. A terrifying growl filled the basement cellar, as the once friendly dog cowered in the corner, bloody. From the thin light Sam felt like he was going to be sick.

He had seen horrible things in his life. Sometimes when John had been hunting there had been no choice, but to bring his son's along. This though… It was needless torture and cruelty. Sam was frozen, unsure of what to do. The urge to run, to hide from what he was seeing was over powering. There was a sick stench of approaching death that filled the air's every crevice. He couldn't leave the dog like that, and slowly he approach it. Each step closer though, made realization come even heavier, it wasn't going to live with even the best medical help at his point.

The dog barked weakly before choking on it's own blood as Sam knelt down beside it. Tears streaming down his face. "I'm sorry…" He whispered over and over again. For not being able to save the innocent animal or for what he was about to do he wasn't sure. There was a knife sticky with blood off to the side, that Harry had obviously been using. Sam picked it up, and held it tightly in his hand. He was no stranger to death, nor had he never killed before, but still he trembled. "Don't worry," he whispered fragilely, "If there is a place for humans, there is most definitely going to be a place for you." The dog's growls had turned into whimpers, just before Sam brought the knife down to the dog's neck.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." Sam jerked around to see Harry at the foot of the stairs haloed from the light coming from above. With a sharp movement it was done in seconds. Releasing the dog from its agony. For Sam though it was only beginning. The knife that had been used was against Sam's neck within seconds of his numbness. "Oh, Sammy… You're mine now." The rest of that night was a nightmare.

Sam was brought back to reality as the knife finally made contact with his skin. No more then that, dove into it. His scream pierced the air.


Dean was driving like a maniac, with only the vague directions that the sheriff had given him honestly, after a few threats about the man's family and town. He didn't bother with the consequences, breaking every speed limit for miles. Sam was out there, and he needed to find him.

Breaking the silence that Dean had placed himself in, his cell phone started to ring. Swearing his head off he pressed the gas harder, and grabbed the phone, noting who it was before pressing speak. "What!" He growled out.

There was silence on the other end before John asked, "Where the hell are you, Dean?"

"I'm in Buffalo, dad, I don't have time for this.."

John barked at that, "The hell you don't! Don't go all nine kinds of shit on me right now. I just got into town, and am pretty sure it's a trickster on your ass…"

"Bullshit, dad! You don't know anything, just listen to me for once alright! Sammy's in trouble… I mean big trouble, and I have got to find him right now. We can talk about what happened after the kid doesn't have the life expectancy of a bird."

There was buzz on the other end for a second before, "Damn it, Dean. It was hard enough when Sam died and…"

"He didn't die!" A growl of frustration left him, "I mean, I couldn't believe it either, but I think that we missed something big dad. I think that Sam wasn't in that building for a while even before the fire."

The buzz returned on both end's of the cell phones. "That's pretty hard to believe, son."

"I know, but dad, if it is, if I am right then Sam's… Sam's in a lot of trash right now and I have got to get to him before…" He broke off. A sense of absolute dread flooded him. "Listen I am traveling down I-25 right now. The Sheriff said that they were in a dark blue mini-van. I'll call you as soon as I have news or whatever."

He hung up before his dad couldn't reply. Time wasn't on his side, and speed was of essence.

Then he saw it coming up fast, a van just as promised against the side of the road. Dean slammed on the breaks, but still past then by fifteen yards or so. He dashed out of the Impala and ran at the car. An older middle-aged couple stared at him wide eyed through the closed window. Dean pounded it, "You open this right now or I swear I'll…" He suddenly noticed that there was no one in back. "Where the hell are they!" The couple just stared at him before he pulled out his gun. In no time he got the answer that he both wanted and didn't. They were pointing frantically into the fields off the side of the road. He swore before heading that direction. Sammy…

Finally he found them, but his race a crossed the fields had held no form of secret attack, a mistake he now sorely regretted. The air hung heavy around them as Dean tried to figure out if he could kill the freak before the knife in Harry's hands got to Sammy's neck. Within an instant the gun that had been in his back pocket was launched and cocked, but Dean was wrong the knife already was cutting Sam's flesh.

"So its back to this again, uh?" Harry screamed out, slightly shaking Sammy as he did so. "Put the gun down, or I swear I am going to rip his head off!" For good measure he gave a sharp tug to Sam's hair pulling the teen's eyes to the sky. Dean swore, but did as he was told, never once glancing away from his brother and Harry.

"Good now back off!"

Slow backward steps followed the command, before stopping five feet away. "Keep going, idiot!" Dean scowled, but did as he was told as the knife cut deeper into Sam's neck. Things were getting out of control… Finally, when Dean was twenty feet away from where he had placed the gun, Harry began to move forward. His eyes narrowed carefully on Dean's form. He had to be careful not to be over careful with this. It was still possible for things to go badly.

Harry and Sam reached the gun, laying innocently in the half eaten grass. He jolted Sam, "Pick it up Sam, that's right nice and slow." His adoptive brother squirmed in his unrelenting grasp before reaching down and picking up the pistol. Then lightning fast he brought it around to send a bullet into Harry's brain, and would have succeeded if not for the Harry's anticipation of the act. In no time flat Sam was breathing heavily into the ground, his adoptive brother pinning him down firmly with both gun and knife in hand.

"You shouldn't underestimate me like that, Sammy. After all I have had years of experience." Harry hadn't forgotten about Dean though, he smirked up at the man who remained standing helpless. "I don't know what Sammy here has told you, asshole, but I am afraid no one gets in between me and my brother." Dean paled with anger. "And as much as I would like to teach you a lesson, I am afraid I need you more for my brother's. Say goodbye." Harry cocked the gun, as he pulled Sam's face up to watch Dean's demise.

"DAMMIT!" The gun went off just after the knife Dean had pulled out of his pocket went flying into Harry's right shoulder. Turning the bullet off just enough so that when Dean dropped it just clipped him. Already though Harry was readying for another shot, even as the hunter ran towards them. Sam watched in horror, before leaping to his feet just in time to catch the second bullet in the chest. Seconds later Dean slammed past and dove on top of Harry, the two of them battling it out as the gun occasionally went off, sending bullets randomly into the distance.

Sam slumped down to the ground, eyes wide open staring at his bleeding chest. A wave of revulsion swept through him as he realized that he could see the rate his heart was beating from the gushes of blood. His vision blurred and then tilted before blacking out completely. No longer mindful of the actions going on around him. Noises were becoming vague to his ears as he finally was swept into unconsciousness. With the thought that the hoped death was too painful.

(I was sorely tempted to leave it at that… I'm not that evil though…)


It was the lack of pain that woke Sam in the noon day sun. He blinked up, calmly wondering what was going on. Out of the corner of his eye movement caused him to glance over. Harry and Dean were rolling around in the dirt in a battle of desperation. Sam blinked absently, the expected rise of emotion didn't come as he calmly got up and looked at the fight. It was strange to look at something so important at so far away. So very far away… he shivered. It was wrong, why was he feeling so disconnected? Before he had…

Sam looked down bemused, his body was still on the ground. The blood that had been gushing only seconds ago now was at a slow trickle. His eyes no longer holding a spark that he never knew that they had. Well, at least that explained why he felt like he did.

A gunshot fired through the air loudly. Freezing both boys in their tracks. In the distance Sam could see a man coming, fuzzily he realized that it was his dad… Wow, he hadn't seen him in so long. A jolt of pain ran through his chest, freezing him up in agony for a instant before leaving. Sam hadn't liked that… if spirits could shiver he would have.

Things were going on around him, Dean telling their dad something, Harry getting up and running away. Dad didn't shoot him though, and when Dean tried all the bullets to the pistol were gone. They should have killed Harry, but maybe not since Harry would be there with Sam then. He didn't want to be with Harry.

Another shot of pain raced through him, sending him back to earth. It hurt, oh it hurt so bad… His dad was arguing with Dean now kneeing beside Sam's body doing something… Another came and went. Whatever they were doing sucked and Sam wanted them to stop. It was hurting him! Didn't they understand that! Sam cried out, when the next one came, letting tears run down his face. "Stop, stop… oh please." The pain wasn't leaving this time, until finally… Sam breathed.

His lungs were starved as he gasped against the pain thriving in each cell of his body. Sam's eyes remained clenched shut, ignoring the yells of his family. It wasn't fair, he didn't want to be back… tears leaked out of his eyes. When Dean reached over him to do something or other, Sam swatted at him weakly. Yelling, "leave me alone! Just…" He trailed off… it hurt so bad… It hadn't hurt this bad before. His limbs tingling from renewed blood to their veins. Finally Sam blacked out, releasing himself from most the pain. The dreams that followed him however did not let him forget, and tears continued to come even as consciousness slipped.


It had been a race to the hospital after Dean and John finally got Sam into the truck. The kids heart had stopped beating another two times along the way, but thankfully was still there in the end. Before the two knew it Sam was taken away from them, and put behind white curtains. Adrenaline pumped through their veins, even as they were forced to sit down and fill out paperwork.

Dean was panicking, Sam had died, actually died this time. The haunting image of those glazed eyes sent a cold chill throughout him. He hadn't even noticed… he had thought that Sam was alright until his dad and come and… A sob wrecked through his body. His brother had taken that bullet for him, it was him that was supposed to be killed not poor innocent Sammy. He rocked himself in the chair. For all he knew, Sam could have permanent brain damage even if they were able to save him… A sense of hopelessness flew over him. This was wrong… so wrong. His tears fell to the ground dripping softly. Sam's death had already destroyed him once, he wouldn't survive another.


Four agonizing hours went past before John and Dean finally got any news. Sam was alive, but in critical condition, by all rights should be dead. A small trickle of relief came and went for Dean. They could still loose Sam at any time. It would be another few hours before they found the real out come to things.

Time it seemed shut down completely during that period. A minute lasted far longer then a day, and a second seemed an eternity. Short conversations took place between the two of them. Enough for Dean to know that his dad no longer believed Sam was a fake. Something about finding him dead had done enough for the old hunter.

Finally after forever they were let into Sammy's room. The kid looked small and cold in the big bed where he lay. Blood was being pumped back into him as he slept. They had been warned that Sam wouldn't wake up to their visit. Being too drugged up on medication to keep the pain levels down. For what time they had to visit the two just stared wonderingly at the person who had been gone so long from their lives. Maybe… maybe things would get better from here? As long as Sammy was got better…

After getting kicked out of the hospital, they found a motel room were they camped out until nine the next morning. They were waiting at the doors when they were finally allowed in Sam's room at ten. Where they waited and watched the youngest Winchester.

Dean was the first one to notice that Sam was awake. The eyes watching him steadily with no hint as to how long they had been. He sucked in a breath harshly before squeezing Sam's hand which he had been holding tightly all afternoon. No response was forth coming though, just the continued stare, and the occasional blink. Dean smiled softly, before bringing his hand up and wiping away some of Sam's bangs.

"You really scared me you know…" He said in a whisper. "I… I wanted to tell you that me and dad, we… we didn't know that the child services had been called you know?" Sam's hand jerked, "We don't have to talk about this right now, I understand, I just wanted to say that… we want you to be with us." Dean felt the importance of reinforcing this into his long lost little brother's brain. "We always wanted you with us, and nothing ever changed that nor ever will, you understand?" He paused. "Cause, Sammy, we love you no matter what yea know? And even if you don't believe me right now… I swear I'm going to be with you so much from here on out that you'll eventually get it through that thick skull." Dean swallowed tightly before shaking his head. "Now see what you've done! Made me into one of those ghetto chick flick dude's. I'll get my revenge later I guess…" Carefully he looked for a response on Sam's face, and was grateful to see a half smile. Their private conversation came to a close as the doctor walked in through the door.

Dean was relaxed for the most part through it all, for everything that Sam had gone through he was still his little brother. Still a Winchester.

(A/N: Hehe, so did I make you guys all hate Harry enough? X) sure hope I did. If I do a sequel, the reader will definitely see more of him. My twisted side likes him to much, I think. . This is pretty much the end. I am going to be posting an epilogue one of these days though... . to let everyone know what happened to certain characters within the next few weeks or so. Don't forget to review! Love u all!)