Messenger madness

Chapter 2

Horo's not so happy ending…

A/N: I'm so proud of myself! I have never updated o fic so quickly! And, in my opinion, this is the funniest chapter (I hope)! I'm thinking about writing a sequel, I even have the idea, but I dunno how it will end up or it will be as funny as this one… So, if you liked this fic, watch out, cause there might be another one!

Messenger IDs:

Yoh – SlackerBoy69

Ren – ChineseShaman

Horohoro - ImTheBossDude

Hao – FutureShamanKing

Manta – BookWorm4U

Ryu – JapaneseCasanova

Lyserg – BritishAvenger

Chocolove – No1Comedian

Anna – YourNightmare

Pirika – TheGirlNextDoor

Tamao – SweetTamao

Summary: The Shaman King characters have discovered the magic of Messenger and now they're trying to hook Horo and Ren up! God protect us all of what may happen next! HoroxRen


Ren: -sleepy- What's that noise? –yawn- Horo, where the hell are you, baka?


Horo: I'm here, Ren!

Ren: What was that sound?

Horo: -alarmed- Um… The toilet flush!

Ren: Oh… Why does my head hurts so much?

Horo: -too fast- I have no idea! Why would I know why your head hurts?

Ren: That was a rhetorical question, you baka…

Horo: Re-to-li-car? Right…

Ren: -sigh- Baka…

Horo: -unsure- Um… would you like a tea or something?

Ren: A big coffee… and a fist of aspirins, if you don't mind…

Horo: S-sure…

-footsteps exiting the room-

Ren: -annoyed- What a baka… How could one like me like an idiot like him? Uh… I'm getting weak… Yuck! And I have morning breath! Wait a minute… I smell of… HOROHORO!!!

-an unmistakable clinquet of the Kwan Dao-

-footsteps running into the room-

Horo: What happened, Ren?

Ren: -outraged- You got me DRUNK!

Horo: -panic stricken- No! I-I didn't! What a-are you t-talking about?

Ren: -yelling- DON'T LIE TO ME! –forced calm- I have never drunk alcohol in my life! And now I wake up with a hangover and smelling of sake! –yelling- What is your EXCUSE???

Horo: I didn't get you drunk! I swear! You did it yourself!

Ren: -yelling- EXCUSE ME?!

-angry footsteps-

Horo: No! Don't get close with that bloody Kwan Dao of yours! Ahhh!!!

-running around the room-

Horo: Ren… -pant- …hear me out… -pant- …or at least…-pant- …stop chasing me!!!

-the running stopped abruptly-

Ren: Very well. But you better make it good or you won't live to see another of those unhealthy hamburgers!

Horo: I… I…

-a few seconds of silence-

Ren: You have no excuse!

-a couple of steps-

Horo: No, Ren, don't come closer! I have an excuse! I really do!

Ren: Well, let's hear it, then!

Horo: -uncharacteristically high-pinched- I wanted to… I… you know… I…

Ren: WHAT?! You got me drunk so you could rape me! I'LL KILL YOU!!!

Horo: No! Ren, don't! Aaaahhhh!!!

-more running around the room-

-the sound of tripping, falling hard on the floor and glass breaking-

Ren: Mwahahahaha! Now I've caught you!

Horo: -desperate- No, Ren, don't do this! You'll hate yourself for it later!

Ren: -madly calm- Quite the contrary. All my problems will be gone once I get rid of you!

Horo: Nooo! Reeen!!!

-the sound of the Kwan Dao hitting the floor then silence-

Horo: Am I still alive? R-Ren? What are you doing on the floor too?

Ren: Uh… My head hurts… All that running has made it spin again…

Horo: -panic-stricken- I'll… I'll get some aspirins…

-running out of the room-

-someone popping down the bed-

Ren: Uh! That baka! I'll kill him once my head stops spinning!

-running into the room-

Horo: -pant- Here're some aspirins… -pant- And your coffee… -pant-

Ren: -barely audible- Thank you…

-a minute of silence-

Horo: Um… Ren, can I sit on the bed too?

Ren: You shouldn't ask me, it's you bed…

Horo: Oh…

-someone popping down the bed-

-awkward silence-

Horo and Ren at the same time: I've got to tell you something!

-a couple of seconds of silence-

Horo and Ren at the same time: You first!

-if blushing had a sound, this would certainly be it-

Horo: You first, Ren…

Ren: Uh… Okay… I… um… I… -quickly- You forgot to put milk in my coffee!

Horo: -confused- No, I didn't! Are you blind?

Ren: O-oh… You're right…

-awkward silence-

Ren: Your turn…

Horo: My turn for what?

Ren: You said you had something to tell me, baka!

Horo: Oh… I… I forgot…

Ren: You what? Baka! Can't you do anything right? You're wasting my precious t- Mph-mph-mph! Mmmmm…

-sound of snogging-

-a couple of loud moans-


SlackerBoy69: Ewww!

SlackerBoy69: That's nasty!

BritishAvenger: At least Horo had the guts to tell him at last…

BritishAvenger: If that could even be counted as telling.

SlackerBoy69: Do you think it's over now?

BritishAvenger: I certainly hope so…

BritishAvenger: I don't think I can take another day of this…


-the kissing stopped-


Ren: What were those noises?

Horo: What noises?

Ren: Don't play dumb! Those sounded like… receiving messages sounds! From messenger!

Horo: I'm sure you imagined it!

Ren: I did not!

Horo: Ren, put that bloody thing down!

-footsteps coming closer-

Horo: NO! Ren, that's my computer! Nooo!

-smashing metal and plastic-

Ren: There! That's what you get for interrupting us!

Horo: M-my poor computer! You killed it! It had no fault! It wasn't even opened!

Ren: What do you… Oh no! YOU! You opened my COMPUTER! I'LL KILL YOU!

Horo: NO! Don't come closer!


Horo: Um… Ren? Why did you pass me? What are you doing there? Ren, that's you computer! Wait!

-evil laugh-


ImTheBossDude has left the chatroom.

BritishAvenger: Not again!

SlackerBoy69: This is the worst luck ever!

BritishAvenger: You should have shut up!

SlackerBoy69: Me?!

BritishAvenger: You started it!


SlackerBoy69: Look at the bright side…

BritishAvenger: What bright side?

SlackerBoy69: At least Horo confessed…

SlackerBoy69: And maybe once Ren calms down he'll ask him out.

BritishAvenger: If Horo survives, that is…

SlackerBoy69: Good point.

SlackerBoy69: Let's go and try to save him.

BritishAvenger: -sigh- Alright…

BritishAvenger: Here we go again.

SlackerBoy69 has left the chatroom.

BritishAvenger has left the chatroom.

A/N: Well, That was it, folks! I know it ended kind of abrupt, but with Ren's temper I doubt he's become immediately all sappy and romantic. And I wanted it to end with a funny thing (at least in my opinion it's funny, lol). But I'm not one to decide that… You have to tell me that! So, press the review button and tell me what you thought of this whole crazy and random fic! Pretty please with sugar on top! –bats eyelashes-