OOC: This was written in hopes to bring back at least some of my Teen Titan muse, especially for my RavenxMalchior fic. I think it came out pretty good.. It may have been done before, but I like it.. Anyways, please review...this is the first one-shot I've done on Fanfiction, and I'd like to know if I should just give up and never do it again or do more. Thank you!

Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Titans, but damnit I wish I did. Cause if I did, the show wouldn't be over, and the last season wouldn't have been so unbelievably cheesy.

MalchiorxRaven forever!

Why are you here? Why must you be so close to be…so temptingly close…I can hear your breaths when you sleep, I can feel your every movement, your lightest step upon the carpet, the breeze you issue forth as you glide through the room… Do you enjoy tormenting me this way, Raven? Do you enjoy holding your presence, your gentle and piercing eyes, your alluring pale skin, the slightest tremor of your whispering blue cloak-do you wallow in my misery?

Each time you move you send a shiver down my leather spine, causing each page to tremble like leaves upon a dying tree… Each time I feel the breath slipping forth from your mouth when you sleep, it shears its way painfully through the chest into my binding, wracking me with agony- Do you hear my screams, Raven? Do you hear my torment, as I die each night knowing you lay there without my binding upon your pillow, that you sleep peacefully while I shudder and scream and writhe in utter agony?

I saw it happen… Raven, I saw everything happen. I saw the way your father took over you... I felt the heat of his rage as I could smell your skin burn… I could taste that disgusting tainted aroma upon your skin, his blemish-How dare he mark your skin? Your pale, utterly beautiful skin, the ashes of the past rubbed against it grain by grain, the history of book after book melded onto you like armor, armor so gentle that my hand could reached out and touch…

I felt you die. And the feeling of you vanishing from this earth was torment- how it appeared this chest with this ancient book survived your own father bearing your home like a throne, I know not. Yet when I felt his red skin touch this palace you and your friends had created, I screamed in my dragon-like anger, roared my defiance. How dare he touch your home?! How dare he do anything to cause the tears that I so mistakeningly let fall down your face?!

But your return… The feeling of your return…from the blackness of the chest I felt you, and all became illuminated…I could imagine you, flying upwards into the sky to face him, to face your demons, to face what only I could understand in you. What did you look like, Raven? I could feel your hair move in the wind, your cloak seemed lighter, that same lightness you bore as I taught you power... You were beautiful, Raven…you were my Raven...You cast aside all hatred of me, and for a moment I felt utter freedom. You pulled all powers, all abilities you had, even those of the black magic I taught you, and you defeated him. You smiled.

The world was celebrating, did you hear it? Did you hear how the earth trembled in joy? How the sun brightly shone in its own glory? How the stars that night flickered and danced and sang their lullabies, bidding you, the hero, to sleep?

Did you hear my pages rustle? Did you hear my pride? That you, you my utmost and sweetest darling, had defeated your demons… I wept for the loss within you, that powerful darkness that I adored and embraced, yet I saw your joy...I saw your unending peace...How could I be joyful? How could I not smile and laugh and sing songs of paper and words and stories, whispering them in your ear?

I am dying, Raven. I have lived this battle hundreds and hundreds of times as the reader followed my stories with their eyes. Did you know that? That by imprisoning me within these pages, I am doomed to relive that horrible battle day after day, I am doomed to witness my own defeat, all through the eyes of a trapped passerby... That I am doomed to look into those horribly hate-filled silver eyes when all I want is to see blue...to see that deep indigo blue...the color I adore...the color I long for... Blue…the color of peace…of calm…of acceptance...

So day after day I await, perched upon my castle, waiting that foolish wizard to come. I have tried fleeing, Raven. I have turning my wings to the black night, flying straight into the stars, but I am always yanked downwards... I always fall, fall from the stars that look so much like your eyes, and land on the ground with a painful, weakening, humiliating thud. I have stopped trying to run. I cannot be reduced to that insignificant worm again, lying in the rubble, staring up at the wizard as he holds out his hand, words of magic on his lips-

Do you know what words I long to hear? Three simple words...words not the most powerful I have heard, but the ones spoken by the voice of gentility, the voice of acceptance, the voice of the creature I could embrace, feeling her lean against my paper skin, feeling her warmth underneath my cage, feeling her there...knowing she was there...

Azarath Metreon Zinthos...

Just those three words… Will you whisper them tonight Raven? As you sit upon your bed, the bed I remember so perfectly and cling to when I can see nothing but the black emptiness of my cage, will you close those angelic eyes of yours and whisper those words? Will you gently hover, as you did before, above your bedspread, feeling that power drain through you? Do you feel my power, Raven, when you speak those words? Does the power I taught you burn through your veins as it did mine, passionately, heatedly, bringing to the surface lust, ambition, rage…?

I pray not.

I would not wish that upon you… I would not wish that lack of control upon one who so desperately fears losing herself in the shadows blackening her heart.

Oh my Raven, my sweet Raven, I love you. Each day as I see those silver eyes burning down on me, I think for one last moment: I shall raise my flames against him...because tomorrow is a new day...and perhaps tomorrow her hand will touch the lock, bearing a key, and gently open the pages to my face

But you never do, Raven... I hear you walk by... I hear your soft voice...and sometimes...sometimes I feel you look my way...sometimes I know you glance at this chest, or you glance at the rose upon your dresser, the flower made of paper, the one that made you smile so beautifully, made your happiness radiate in a blue glow..

I can't keep waiting.

Each day is agony, Raven…each day I feel the humiliation of defeat, and in the darkness I find myself reliving each moment with you... I feel that pounding regret, knowing that I let you go…that I could have taken you into my arms and held you, protected you, been at your side when you faced your demons… I feel that disgust, that impossibly powerful disgust… I hurt you, Raven. I made you cry.

I will not keep waiting.

I see him now, even as I dictate this letter to you, this letter you will never see. You will never open this chest and read the pages of my book again…you will never see the three words written on the first page. Three words. Three simple words, and maybe these three words bear more power than I could ever believe.

There he is. He stands, staring at me, his black scarf billowing as if the bottom of a cloak…you never wore black, Raven...never a black cloak…But I am glad. When I gave you the power of darkness, you completed it by wearing the gown of purity… And for that I thank you, I bless you, I bow to you… You have always been my better.

Ah, he raises his hand... This should be when my mouth opens, the fireball stretching outwards in a painful blow to burn him… But I won't, Raven. Look… his magic is white... so much like your cloak...so much like the pureness in your heart…You have darkness within you, Raven...but I have never met anyone as pure of heart as you...

Look Raven… look… his magic comes towards me... It is so beautiful…now that I truly look at it... I have lived so long despising magic except my own, hating all humans except my human form… But its alright now, Raven…its alright…I don't hate anymore…

Will you read this? Will your tears fall on my behalf? Oh I hope not, Raven….you need no cry for me… As much as those crystalline tears would make my heart soar, to know you cared for me, that these last words could leave some marking on your soul…I would not wish the tears of an angel in any way…

There are three words Raven…three simple words that make my heart soar…make my eyes water in a single moment to think of…three words that remind me so much of you… Of your beauty, of your power, of your pure, untainted heart… of the demons you faced, of your courage, of your triumph. Three simple words…that I have longed to hear uttered from your lips…to let you hear from my own…

I love you.