A/N: Hello everyone! Two chapters almost three days apart huh? Well I'm gonna be putting em out faster now because I'm off ffrom school so keep a sharp eye on your e-mail in box!

Also as promised there is some Lemon in this chapter so I set up a Xxxxx.Lemon Begins.xxxxX and Xxxxxx.Lemon Ends.xxxxX for ya'll. You know the drill, control F.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.


Chapter 13

The Party Ends

The Dance Begins

Naruto stood over a very intoxicated Ino. She groaned as he helped her up and hung her arm over his shoulder to balance her as he guided her toward the door. Yui, who had peaked into the kitchen and saw how lovely Tenten looked returned.

"Naruto-sama…let me take Ino-chan."

Naruto blinked, "Huh? Why?"

Yui delicately took Ino and put her arm around her just as Naruto had. "Because you have someone else to worry about." She took a few steps, testing if she could balance Ino without hurting her and looked back at her master, "I can take care of Ino-chan, you need to take care of Tenten."

Naruto didn't know why she put emphasis on the 'need' in that last sentence, but let it go. He went to the kitchen and leaned against the lintel. "Hey."

Tenten, who had been sipping at a glass of tea while sitting at the island, smiled back at him. "Hello."

He walked in and sat across from her and poured himself a cup. "Alright…I need to ask you something really important…but I don't know how to say it."

"Just go ahead and say it Naruto-chan. I'm sure I can handle whatever it is."

Naruto drank his tea in one gulp and set the cup down, "did you come to this party just to have sex with me?" Naruto asked.

Tenten blinked. "What?"

"You can't handle it huh?" he retorted, a sly foxy grin passing over his features. When she didn't answer Naruto sighed, "Look Tenten…I need to know why you came."

Tenten blushed, "Well…I don't really know myself," she sighed. "I guess it was just a bunch of stuff that came up lately and I was confused about it and how it made me feel."

"What do you mean?"

She rolled her eyes at him, "Do I really have to answer that?" As she saw Naruto go squint, she realized she did, "Naruto. You've become a strong ninja; no one can say anything against that. But now, you have a beautiful girl who has tried nearly every second she's been here to become your lover, you've got," she tried to think of a way to put it delicately, "extreme proportions, and you've slept with the woman every kunoichi in the village wants to be.

"You've really just gotten everyone's attention. And those of us who were around you for the longest, I think Sakura and Ino can say this a lot better than I can, think we deserve to be with you first. Or at least have some weight in terms of potential lovers y'know?"

Naruto had refilled his cup and was drinking from it. He hadn't worn his headband that day so his wild yellow hair hung around his face, casting his eyes in darkness. "That's it huh?" he asked sipping his tea.

Tenten looked at the countertop. "Yes. I just wanted to see if you really did it. Because well Naruto, you haven't shown to be the most outgoing guy in the world. And you'd have to be pretty much the opposite of who you are to 'get' with Tsunade."

Naruto sipped his tea and smirked…If she knew why I had sex with Tsunade-bachan she would see why I'm not too happy…

Looking at his face she reached a hand out and took hold of his, "Was I wrong to think about it?"

He looked at her and smiled, "Not really! I'm flattered you (who is one of the sexiest and strongest women in Konoha) would want to do that with me."

Tenten smiled and retracted her hand after Naruto gave it a squeeze. She bit her lip and drank some tea. "What do you want Naruto?"

"Huh?" he asked looking up.

"What do you want? It's pretty obvious Yui wants to be with you. The same for Ino too I'd guess from the little spat we had earlier. All three of us have been going crazy trying to get what we want from you. But I don't think any of us, besides Hinata, has wanted to know what you want. So," she leaned forward and showed off her cleavage, "What do you want Naruto?"

He eyed her breasts then her, "You really want to know?" he replied.

Tenten leaned back and nodded. Naruto stood up and walked around to her. She blushed as he put his hands on the sides of her face. His thumbs rubbed her cheeks slowly and without purpose until he bent down and kissed her lips gently. Her body heated up and she tried to deepen the kiss but he broke it and then returned to it.

Every time Tenten tried to add any tongue or passion Naruto would halt their actions and pull back just enough to keep her from continuing. She finally got the idea and just let his lips get pressed against hers. He let her face go and took a step back.

"What…what was that?" Tenten asked.

Naruto looked at her like she was stupid, "A kiss."

Tenten glared at him. "No shit Foxy, but what was it."

Naruto grinned, "I just wanted to kiss you." She blushed. "You wear lip gloss all the time like Tsunade-bachan now so it doesn't mean as much, but when we were younger you only wore it once or twice and you looked so cute."

"That's all you want?" Tenten asked, now a little disappointed.

He shrugged and leaned against his kitchen counter, "Yeah if you can believe it." His face brightened a little. "I care about you Tenten, the same I care for all the other girls and women I know," Tenten wondered if she qualified as a woman. "Sex isn't something to be scared of, Tsunade showed me that, but it isn't something I'm ready to give out like candy. Do you know how hard it is to go from having the plague to being a miracle cure? Do you understand?"

Tenten nodded. She did. Very well. Nearly every woman in Konoha, for some reason that she herself did not know, had treated Naruto as dirt for a long time. And now, in a relatively short amount of time, most of them had done a complete one eighty. Even if Naruto did want to sleep with any of them she doubted if he was ready to.

She stood up and went to him, her feet padding softly on his tile floor and leaned against the counter with him. "I understand what you want. How about we make a deal."

"A deal? The last deal I made with you included me getting very sharp kunai thrown at my ass. Literally."

Tenten grinned remembering that little bet. "I liked it when you kissed me Naruto. What if I said I wanted you to do that more?"

Naruto thought for a second. Considering his bet with Yui included kissing her private areas, this was relatively benign. "Alright. I kiss you when you want and what do I get?" Naruto was no fool.

Tenten kissed him on the cheek. "What do you want?"

Naruto thought about. He looked Tenten over. The curve of her perky breasts, her perfectly set hips and strong legs. He rubbed his chin. "What are you willing to do?"

Tenten leaned in until their noses were touching. "Anything…Naruto…sama…" she whispered huskily drawing out every syllable. Just because the boy didn't feel like having sex didn't mean Tenten couldn't get some nice foreplay out of it.

Naruto grinned showing off his sharper than average teeth. If Naruto had a mirror he would have realized his face was exactly like the Kyuubi's. While it was slightly chilling, the smell of Naruto's confidence, which coincidentally was also his pheromones, was beginning to drive Tenten a bit mad.

"Well?" she asked.

"I've got an idea…"

Xxxxxx.xxxxx.xxxxxX

Ino was at a pass. She looked down at the very beautiful woman in her bed. Noumaki Yui was every bit a woman that Naruto was a man. And Ino realized that if she loved Naruto, any hint of that love could be easily transferred to Yui, if she indeed became a lesbian. But Ino didn't want that.

She wanted to be closer to Naruto. Not Yui.

Even so, Ino had to wonder how bad it would be. To have that kind of intimacy with another woman. At one time she and Sakura had shared a bond that deep, but Sasuke had driven it apart.

No…

They had ruined it with their own stupidity. She looked at Naruto's home through her window and wondered if he was regarding Tenten as she was regarding Yui. Not in the same fashion, of course, but with the same thoughts.

A lock of Yui's unruly hair drooped into her eyes and it tickled her nose. As she saw the girl was about to sneeze Ino pushed it out of the way. Yui was so adorable. Ino found herself smiling.

But I want Naruto. I want to be with Naruto…she thought. What does Yui want…what does Naruto want? What does anyone want? (its 'with' not 'be with', that way it holds more meaning then the two)

Sighing Ino realized that trying to think while still partially hung over, and coming back from the potential lesbian spooning that had happed prior to her waking up, was not a good idea. It would be better to leave these things to the morning. As she was about to go back to her original place she looked at Yui and pecked her on the cheek.

A blush came over the girl and she smiled.

Goodnight Yui…maybe in the morning we can straighten things out.

Xxxxxx.xxxxx.xxxxxX

The next day, as a beautiful sun rose over Konoha Shizune, assistant and lieutenant to Tsunade of the Sannin awoke with a hangover bigger than Tsunade's bikini cleavage.

"Oh Kami-sama," she grunted as she brushed aside her covers. "Note to self…stop taking up Tsunade-sama's habits."

She grunted as she stood up and headed for her bathroom. In her medicine cabinet she kept a bottle of the hangover medicine that Tsunade had made for her. In truth it wasn't for her but for any of Shizune's guests. Normally Shizune kept her liquor well, but something about the beer last night was stronger than normal.

Jiraya.

Her brain farted his name out. That would explain why Anko and Kakashi were guarding the beer and putting anti-toxin in it…she mumbled mentally as she opened the door to her bathroom. But it wasn't it was the door to her closet.

Am I still drunk? Oh there it is…she thought as she turned around and entered the alcove of linoleum and bright light. Very bright light.

She cursed and fumbled around, squinting and hitting the wall until she found her cabinet. She glanced around and wondered…Did I get some acid? Why is everything…lavender…she mused as she opened the small door and peered inside. Shit no hangover medicine. But I could have sworn I put it in-

"Oh you're awake Shizune-chan!"

Shizune froze. Her hangover seemed to melt away as she turned around and saw Mitarashi Anko standing in a pair of low cut sweat pants and a black wife beater, and no underwear. Shizune suddenly felt very cold, and she looked down at herself. She was wearing not her normal clothes, but a shirt proclaiming 'anaconda wanted' and a bright purple g-string.

"An-ko…why…why am I in your clothes?!" Shizune asked, honestly afraid.

"Well you see-"

"Yo. She's up?" a masculine voice asked. Kakashi's covered face appeared over Anko's shoulder. He lifted a mug of coffee and sipped it.

"KAKASHI?!" Shizune cried. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!"

"Drinking some of Anko's excellent coffee. It's tasty." He sipped some more.

Once before, this fiction had delved into the mind of Shizune, we now shall do so again.

Enjoy…

Alright Shizune get a hold of yourself. It just so happens you're in Anko's house wearing Anko's underwear. Anko is standing in front of you wearing stuff she probably wore to bed and Kakashi is behind her with only a pair of pants on…

Waitaminute…

If what I think happened, happened, then I had a three way with Anko and Kakashi and I had to see…to see…

"I SAW KAKASHI'S FACE BUT I WAS TOO DRUNK TO REMEMBER!"

Wait! If Anko and I had sex than…oh god! ALL NATURAL LUBE! My ass hurts! MY ASSHOLE HURTS! No…There's now way Anko could put something in my ass…but if she put something in my…and Kakashi was…KAKASHI SODOMIZED ME! Everything tastes like strawberry lube…WHY DOES IT TASTE LIKE STRAWBERRIES! I'm allergic to strawberries. And if they used strawberry lube on my ass…THERE ARE HIVES IN MY ASSHOLE!

Alright, that's enough of that.

Anko set Shizune's coffee down and slowly closed the bathroom door as said medic Nin began to run around in a circle with her arms waving around. The two jounin exited the bedroom and headed downstairs.

"You could have at least let her keep her clothes on," Kakashi said sighing.

Anko grinned at her masked friend, "Where would the fun be in that? I still say some mayonnaise on her top lip would have been hilarious."

Kakashi weighed it in his mind, "I wonder when she'll find that little surprise you slipped into her bra."

Anko smirked as they heard Shizune scream. "SWEET KAMI-SAMA! NOT VIBRATORS!"

The two jounin looked at each before Kakashi blinked, "You're evil."

"I learned from the best…" she grinned.

Kakashi realized that her grin was very much like Naruto's.

That's kinda creepy.

Xxxxxx.Lemon Begins.xxxxxX

Naruto yawned and stretched.

The only problem was…he was already stretching. Slightly confused he checked things. He hadn't had any beer so he wasn't drunk. He could move his arms and legs, but only slightly. He opened his eyes and examined his surroundings and realized several things that made him feel like screaming.

1. His arms and legs were chained to his bed.

2. He only had on his boxers.

3. He, once again, had a massive hard-on.

And Tenten was nowhere in sight.

This is not good…he thought and tried desperately to get free. He could not. He saw the chains flashed with each movement. Oh hell…chakra absorbing chains. FUCK!

"Good morning, Naruto-kun," he heard. His head snapped up and he saw Tenten grinning at him, sitting on the bed in what had to be a combination corset and Chinese slit skirt dress.

His eye twitched, "Tenten…"

"Yes?"

"WHY THE FUCK AM I CHAINED TO MY BED!"

"Well…I saw that you had that," she said poking his dick with her outstretched finger. "and I decided to help you."

"This isn't helping me! Don't help me! I NEED NO ASSISTANCE!" he cried.

"But Naruto-kun…" Tenten panted. "It smells so good…like something to eat…" she huffed as she pulled his boxers down over it. It flew up to attention and Naruto hated it.

I hate you Penis. I hate you so much.

Tenten stroked it subtly with her hand before cupping his balls and taking the head into her mouth. Naruto winced as she slowly took more and more of him in. she coughed when she went too deep and wiped her mouth. "It's too big for me…" she whined.

"Well then I guess you can LETMEGO!"

Tenten grinned. "I still have one more thing to try…" she smirked. She sat on his stomach with her back to him and slid down until her butt hovered over his face.

As Naruto saw this he remembered something Jiraya had told him long ago when he was drunk.

'Naruto'…the inebriated Sannin had said…'the deadliest move in any woman's sexual arsenal is the Sixty-Nine.'

'Sixty-nine?'

'YES! When used by a master, usually with your arms bound in some way, you are at the complete mercy of the woman! She can use her mouth or breasts on your penis and balls to her hearts content! Also if your hands are held off from her own private area then she can force you to pleasure her!

'Truly it is a dangerous move! The only way to counter it is to…blah, blah, blah, not about ramen. No new techniques…yada, yada, yada.'

FUCK! Why didn't I listen to him! Why do I always DO that?! First the chakra concentration thing with Iruka-sensei! Now trying to figure out how to get a hot and bothered weapons mistress off my cock! DAMN YOU JIRAYA! DAMN YOU!

"OH! Naruto-sama! It's getting bigger!"

FUCK-DIDDLES!

Tenten sucked it harder, now with her throat in line with the natural curve of his rising she could slide it all the way down as if it was a banana. He heard her moan and also he heard his own purring (you damn traitorous vocal chords!) as she slowly began to knead his balls with one hand, while the other kept his dick straight for her.

"Naruto-sama it's so big."

Who the hell taught her ventriloquism?! Do I really wanna know that? WHY AM I THINKING ABOUT VENTRILOQUISM?! I'm currently getting my dick sucked by TENTEN who I agreed…wait a minute…what if Lee finds out…OH GOD! What if Gai finds out?! SOMEONE HELP MEEEE!

Xxxxxx.xxxxx.xxxxxX

But, as we all know, no one will.

Xxxxxx.xxxxx.xxxxxX

Naruto groaned as he felt himself reach his limit, until Tenten removed his penis from her mouth. She took a large and loud gulp of air before twisting to look at him. "Ready Naruto-sama?"

"If by 'ready' you mean 'ready for you to get the fuck off of me and let me go from your damn chains' then yes. Yes I am," he grunted in response.

Tenten grinned before swinging around so she was crouching just beyond his dick on the bed. She picked up a small jar and unscrewed the lid before scooping four fingers into it and took a large lump of soft cream, which she then began to rub excessively into Naruto's dick.

Oh god…not…not…LUBE!

He watched as Tenten finished coating him then slid her hand, still covered in a moderate amount of cream, between her legs and saturated her own genitals. Naruto gulped when she pulled her hand back and licked her fingers.

Tenten crawled on top of him like a cat and kissed him again. He tasted the cream and her juices, causing his body to react. She reached back and flipped the skirt of her dress so it fell over his member. She slid her hand along the curve of her ass and pressed the tip against her lips. With a double movement of pushing him and sitting up Naruto felt his dick slide effortlessly into her.

The two of them groaned. Naruto from the simultaneous warmth (of her uterus) and cold (of the cream). Tenten from his oppressive size.

"Tenten…"

She put two fingers to his mouth and laid against him again. He grunted as she shifted on top of him. She didn't weigh as much as Tsunade, but her legs and abdomen were stronger. Naruto, if he had had enough focus to think about it, would guess that Tsunade felt weaker when they had sex because her chakra control was off due to his powerful pheromones.

But he was more concerned about how tight Tenten's pussy was and it didn't even graze his mind.

She kissed his neck and scratched at his chest as she lifted her lower body and set it down, trying to get the feel for her limits of movement. When she found that even with Naruto's penis primarily bent in half she could move her body up and down, while being bent herself, she did it. Naruto growled into her ear as he struggled against the chains to move.

Even in the throws of her lust Tenten noticed some of the weaker links in the chain were bending. She grinned and nibbled lightly on his earlobe. "Those chains should be draining you of any extra chakra in your system," she whispered as she squeezed her thighs.

He felt her inner muscles constrict and nearly strangle him. Growling deeper in his throat he showed her a toothy grin, "You should remember I have extra stamina on back up."

Her eyes glinted in the limited light of the morning sun so they were almost bright orange. She kissed him forcefully. He concentrated and broke the chain of his left hand and grabbed her left ass cheek. She gasped into his mouth, especially when he dug his fingers into her meat and scratched her with his nails. She dug her nails into his chest and grunted as she sat up right.

His free hand went to her chest and palmed her small perky breast. He squeezed it before ripping the bodice of her dress off. He did it with such force it shook her and caused one of her buns to come undone. The hair fell and obscured a large part of the small fleshy peak, but it didn't stop him from pulling her back down to sample her nipple. He bit it, not taking the care she showed to his ear and relished the small moans and squeaks of surprise she was making.

"You're too rough Naruto-sama!" she cried running her hands through her hair.

You're the one who put me chains while I was unconscious dammit…he wanted to reply, but her strong fingers dug into his scalp and demanded he continue the abuse of her tit. Naruto wriggled his head free and took as much as her small breast as he could into his mouth, and like he had done with Tsunade, began to show that even chained he was in control. He sank his fangs, which in his highly aroused state had transformed into that of a normal tailed state, into her skin, breaking it just enough for blood to bubble up.

She cried out, either in pain or pleasure he couldn't tell.

She had slowly begun to pick up the pace of her riding, but now, as she heard the creaking of the chains around his legs, she hurried herself, tightening the muscles of her vagina and her insides and squeezed her thighs as hard as she could. Naruto roared and grabbed the back of her neck forcing her mouth to his.

She screamed into it as she felt his nails, now more applicable as claws; dig once more into the meat of her butt. She felt his teeth snatch at the skin of her lips and drove her mad on the smell and taste of her own blood. She broke the kiss and pushed him back down to the edge of the bed.

He tried to get up, but she drew a new chain and wrapped it securely around his arm and threw the kunai into opposite corners of the wall, keeping his limbs down. She grinned madly as she bounced on him, making him feel as if his dick would be pulled off.

"God!" he bellowed.

"Soon, hold on Naruto-sama," she breathed taking his face in her hands and showering it with kisses as her body began to heat up. She felt the gathering of her climax and the tensing of the muscles in his dick.

And when he came (to her it felt like some kind of eruption) she did as well arching her back and all but screaming.

It was a short release, but it had been hot and hard into her, as when she climbed off of him she felt some slide down the inside of her thigh. I'm not as tight as I though ne?…she said mentally as she sat at the edge of Naruto's bed.

The blonde himself sighed. Once again he had been forced to have sex, but he had at least enjoyed it. The chains were a little freaky, and he did not want to repeat this ever again.

Having sex by force two times was enough.

"So Tenten…are we done? Can I get up now?" he asked looking at her.

she laughed, her shoulders gigging with each sound of mirth. "sorry Naru-chan…we still have a long, long way to go," she said as she stood and turned around.

Naruto realized, once again something was wrong.

1. He was now looking at Tenten between two large mounds.

2. Tenten was pulling something on.

3. He suddenly could not feel his penis.

Oh…God…Naruto thought suddenly understanding why Tenten had just called him Naru-chan,

Somehow, someway, he had changed form from his normal self into his Oiroke-No-Jutsu form. And Tenten had revealed the largest, blackest, bumpiest most terrifying strap-on dildo Naruto had ever heard of.

It also appeared to have an on board motor.

"Uh…Ten…ten…what is that?"

"The long way to go!"

Naruto managed to scream: "BUDDHA'S DOUGHNUTS AND COFFEE!" Just as Tenten leapt at him, the motor on her hideous friend billowing exhaust.

Xxxxxx.Lemon Ends.xxxxxX

Naruto sat up and panted hard. He quickly tested his limbs and found not one of them was bound by chain. He slapped his chest to find hard muscle instead of soft breast fat. And as a last precaution he flipped up the sheets and his pants and boxers and looked dead at his penis, which thankfully, was limp.

He sighed contentedly and shook. Quickly looking to his left he saw that Tenten was right where she had been when he had fallen asleep. Slowly his bodily functions went back to normal, but distantly he could hear someone laughing.

Naruto stood up and went to his bathroom and splashed cold water into his face. the slightly purple iris' and slit pupils told him all he needed to know.

He growled, "Don't ever do that again Baka-ko (1),"

Another round of laughing went off in his head and he waited for the last of the fox's mental influence to fade before going downstairs. As he descended he realized that he had not seen Shikamaru leave.

That coupled with the smoke coming from under his guestroom door, and the sounds of mumbling made him hope it was a fire spirit with a swollen tongue. That he could deal with.

"Shikamaru?" he asked knocking on the door. it cracked a little and one beady black eye glanced at him. "What are you doing in there?"

"Hiding."

"From?"

Shikamaru looked from the left to the right. it then focused on Naruto to such an extent it actually shrank in size. "Trouble."

Naruto smacked himself in the forehead. "Why are you doing it in my guestroom?"

Shikamaru took a puff of his unseen cigarette. "Because you cause so much trouble. It's always darkest at the base of the lighthouse."

Naruto's eye twitched. "Look Shikamaru. I had a really weird dream and you becoming a hobo in my new house is not helping things!"

Shikamaru took another puff. "I'm sorry Naruto. But I can't trust you or what you say. The Trouble may have already gotten to you." And he closed the door. Naruto heard the sound of locks being turned and realized that Shikamaru was not going to leave his guestroom anytime soon.

Naruto took a few seconds to calm himself and went to his kitchen.

He ran back and began to beat on the door. "THIS ISN'T INVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERS YOU LAZY BUM! GET OUT HERE BEFORE I TAN YOUR ASS BETTER THAN THE SUNA SUN!"

"It's too early for this," Tenten said walking down and past the ranting Naruto.

Naruto grumbled and followed her into the kitchen to get some breakfast.

Meanwhile in his new Smoke Room Shikamaru pulled a small spoon from his back pocket. It flashed in the limited light and he glanced at the hardwood floor. I must do it…to avoid the Trouble…it's coming…I can feel it. It has made its move. So I must counter.

Shikamaru looked around. Come Watson! The game is afoot!

And he began to dig.

Xxxxxx.xxxxx.xxxxxX

Ino sat up in bed and had the smell of tea hit her nose. She looked at her nightstand and saw the steaming cup sitting there next to a small biscuit. She drank the tea and finished the biscuit quickly before heading downstairs to see Yui reading the morning paper.

She snickered at Garfield comic and looked up. "Hello Ino-chan!"

For a girl that tried to turn my sexual preference on its ear she doesn't seem too tired. "Okay Yui. You and me have to talk."

Yui looked up from her comics and blinked. "What?"

Ino sat down across from Yui and motioned for her to close the paper and put it down. Yui complied and set it on the far side of the table. "Let me tell you straight: I don't like girls." Yui nodded as if that was the end of it. The nod was also the kind you give old people who keep talking. "Listen to me Yui!" Ino decided she would have to talk to her as she did Naruto. Which meant, basically, not being nice.

"I don't like what you did yesterday." Yui seemed to take notice. "I was not only drunk but feeling like shit. I'm sorry if this is blunt but I don't want or need that kind of help. So listen up and listen good: Sex doesn't help everything. In fact, for situations like last night it makes some things worse."

Yui had lowered her head and looked like a dog that had peed the carpet.

"I'm sorry…" she said, her voice small.

"Yui you don't have to be sorry," Ino said sighing loudly. "Just remember that alright? And don't try and kiss me again."

Yui looked at her with a tilted head, "it didn't help?"

Ino glared at her, "No."

"But it always helped Joya-sensei."

"The woman who is three-times your age kisses you to feel better?"

"Well not like the way I kissed you Ino-chan," her perkiness restored.

Ino furrowed her brow…this girl is more screwed up than Naruto!…"Alright Yui, tell me, why did you kiss me?"

Yui blushed and looked at her hands again, "I like you Ino-chan. I was trying to show you. And I was hoping it would make you feel better."

"You could have just given me a hug and patted me on the back saying 'It's fine Ino-chan.'"

"But I wanted to kiss you!"

Ino's eye twitched. She sighed. "Yui…" the face of the girl across from her told Ino there was no hope of explaining how…wrong? Unneeded? Not proper?…she had been in kissing her. "I'm very thankful that you wanted to help…but like I said. Sex doesn't help everything. Say it Yui."

"Sex doesn't help everything," The fact Yui changed her voice to match Ino's made it seem as if she was mocking her.

"Say it like you mean it." Ino felt as if she was trying to instruct a child how to behave in public.

Which, coincidentally, she was.

"Sex doesn't help everything," Yui repeated, this time in her normal, 'I'm really, REALLY sorry I peed on the carpet' voice.

"That's better…"

"So…" Yui asked looking at Ino, "…what do we do now?"

"Believe it or not, my parents never told me about this when they told me about 'kissing and private areas'"

Xxxxxx.xxxxx.xxxxxX

Uzumaki Naruto wasn't too surprised when Yui walked into their kitchen. He had made a bowl of instant ramen and was eating it slowly. Tenten had left after another kiss, this time she hadn't tried to give any tongue much to his approval, and had agreed to his idea. He planned to talk to Yui about it

Yui went straight to the fridge to pull out a bottle of water and drink, before heating up what was left to make ramen. She sat down and ate her instant cup slowly.

"So…?" Naruto asked as he finished his own.

"I kissed Ino-chan."

"I kissed Tenten."

Yui slurped some noodles, "I shared a bed with her."

Naruto clicked his chopsticks together, "I spooned with her, and she has some muscular thighs (2). Which can be very sexy, by the way."

"Ino-chan told me she loved you in a very touching fit of drunken passion before kissing me while thinking I was you."

Naruto blinked.

"And we spooned."

He pouted, "You win."

Xxxxxx.xxxxx.xxxxxX

Shikamaru finally broke through the hard wood floor. He realized that if he had a shovel or even a kunai he would be able to dig much faster…but that also meant going outside.

Where the Trouble was.

He would have to risk it. As pawns were sacrificed in Shougi to potentially get more pieces so would he venture out to obtain better digging implements.

As soon as he felt Yui and Naruto's chakra signatures leave.

Then his sub-plan would begin.

Xxxxxx.xxxxx.xxxxxX

Tenten, who had just finished showering and dressing, flopped down on her bed. She groaned slightly. Last night had to be, in effect, the weirdest and most eye opening she had ever experienced.

First she realizes Naruto didn't respond to any advances because he wasn't interested, but because he didn't trust them enough to be that close. He had after all (Naruto had told her over breakfast), been subdued by not only a genjutsu but also by the fact Tsunade is a very imposing presence.

The breasts alone, my god…Tenten thought.

Tenten herself was feeling a little bit mischievous. Naruto, who was far more observant than Tenten had given the boy credit for, had realized that getting close to Tenten would make Ino feel bad, and he had acted accordingly, with Yui.

Although Tenten doubted that Yui would help Ino in the way Naruto was hoping.

And the reason Tenten was feeling like a trickster was mostly with Naruto's little plan. As with all of things that he had learned in his life he added a little twist that was totally Naruto. The Oiroke-No-Jutsu as a prime example.

And this plan, which turned the main focus of having sex with all the girls to merely becoming closer (and potentially finding a good girlfriend), was almost exactly like Jiraya's plan.

With far less lube.

The chocolate haired kunoichi grinned as she wondered if the girls would follow Naruto's plan. Because, in all honestly, they were bred, born, and raised to fight. And Shinobi pride is much thicker than blood.

Plus Naruto's plans usually ending with something blowing up anyway.

Xxxxxx.xxxxx.xxxxxX

Kakashi and Anko bowed as low as they could and still be standing. "We're really sorry," they said in perfect tandem.

Tsunade was currently sitting in her chair (with her extra comfy cushion for just such occasions) and letting her eye twitch and her veins bulge. Long ago she had found a scroll in the Third's desk detailing how to cause these reactions consciously. There was a note saying: only to be used against Naruto-esque Antics.

Tsunade now realized why he had put that.

Xxxxxx.xxxxx.xxxxxX

The only woman in the Sannin had been sleeping contently with Joya. The two had gone to bed earlier that night than normal because they had nothing better to do and had both agreed lesbian sex had gotten too boring when done just to do it.

So, when Konohagakure No Sato's special Shinobi Equipped and Run Hospital called and said that there was a hysterical Shizune screaming about her asshole and hives, Tsunade had not been happy to be the one chosen to dig around her paranoid assistant's butt first thing in the morning.

And when she found out why Shizune was yelling about her ass Tsunade, a cranky, sake-less Tsunade, had called Hatake Kakashi and Mitarashi Anko in for an early morning meeting.

Xxxxxx.xxxxx.xxxxxX

Tsunade sighed, "Do you two understand that Shizune could have been mentally traumatized? AND I WOULD HAVE HAD TO DEAL WITH IT!" she slammed her hand down on her recently repaired desk. "How am I supposed to direct the actions of a village full of trained killers with magical powers when my assistant is COMPLAINING ABOUT A SWOLLEN ASSHOLE?!"

Kakashi held up his hand, "What is it Kakashi?!" she snarled.

"We didn't put anything in her ass. Just for reference." He lowered her hand.

Tsunade considered breaking his arm. Then grunted. "Alright you two are suspended! NO SHINOBI ACTIONS OR MISSIONS FOR MR. AND MRS. FUCK WITH TSUNADE'S HELP!"

Kakashi raised his hand again.

"WHAT?! WHAT FOR FUCK SAKE!"

"So Naruto and Yui have no missions either?"

Tsunade's eye twitched, this time without her making it, "…I guess not…" she rubbed her temples. How could this day get any worse?!

Xxxxxx.xxxxx.xxxxxX

Tsume walked up her stoop humming to herself. She took out her key ring and jingled it a little before opening her front door and walking in. she looked around and then sniffed. Kiba's not home…?

"Hey Tsume," she heard from the kitchen. Following the sound of the voice she saw Kuromaru, in his human form, reading the paper while Akamaru lapped some water at the table. "Where were you last night?"

Tsume grinned, "That's for me to know…"

"And me to sniff out yeah I get it…hmm? Kiba isn't with you?" he asked. Akamaru stopped and looked at his master's mother.

She furrowed her brow, "No. I smelled he wasn't home. Didn't he come back last night?"

The two dogs shook their heads. "We got in early from visiting the Triplets (3). We thought he would be back after us, but he never came in."

Tsume frowned, her lip curled revealing a set of sharp canines. "I don't like this…something has happened…"

There came a weak, soft knock at the door. Tsume whirled around and hurried to it. When she opened the door she screamed.

"BY INU-KAMI'S WATER DISH! KIBA WHAT HAPPENED?!"

Xxxxxx.xxxxx.xxxxxX

Joya was peeling an apple, as Tsunade's berate-ment of Kakashi and Anko had yet to finish so she had nothing to do when the ANBU charged into the hallway leading to Tsunade's office.

"What is it? She's busy," Joya said sternly. The ANBU stopped, turned, and bowed.

"The hospital is requesting Tsunade-sama's services right away!" he said.

"Is it Shizune's ass again?"

"NO! Inuzuka Kiba has come under some sort of intense attack! They need her expertise to judge the type of enemy and weapon."

"Well we better hurry in and get Muni-hime going," Joya said standing and throwing the apple into her mouth, lifting the she veil wore, and crunched it happily. Opening the door she called Tsunade and quickly explained what had happened.

Sighing the Sannin rose, "Alright I'm coming. YOU TWO!" she said snapping her head to the two trickster Jounin who had tried to sneak out, "Remember what I said…" she hissed.

They nodded furiously and dashed out of the office, by secret ninja pathway as Tsunade and Joya and the ANBU hurried to the hospital.

As they arrived doctor Akabane Kuroudo briskly walked up to them. He grinned with a grave glint in his eyes. Tsunade remembered that he had been an enemy ninja who had come from some faraway island Nation. Supposedly he had a jutsu that transformed his blood into a weapon.

Ignoring this she shook his hand as briskly as he had approached her. "Hello Tsunade-sama. I'm happy that you came so quickly."

"It doesn't matter, give me the situation," she ordered following him to Kiba's room.

"Of course. Late last night Inuzuka Kiba was attacked. Because he was either hit so fast he doesn't know what hit him or his mind has temporarily subdued it from his memory he has no recollection what-so-ever."

"Where and when was he found?"

"Late this morning. He dragged himself to his mother's home where she found him and brought him here immediately. We checked him and deduced that he should-…Tsunade-sama it is this way," he said pointing.

Tsunade saw the sign above the door and hallway. "But…this is…"

He struck a doctor pose, "Yes…THE SER! The Sexual Emergency Room!"

Tsunade's eye twitched.

Joya started to laugh.

And all of us have died a little on the inside.

Xxxxxx.xxxxx.xxxxxX

Kiba was unconscious. He laid on the bed as his mother sobbed uncontrollably to the nurse who was checking his vitals. When Tsunade and Joya and Akabane entered she leapt at the Sannin and buried her face in her breasts. If Tsunade wasn't used to this by now (as most people showering her with emotion somehow managed to fall in there) she would have been a little angrier.

She patted the dog woman's back, "It's fine Tsume…uh Joya…"

Joya stepped up and hugged Tsume. She whirled and started crying into Joya's kimono. The things I do for love…or is it her ass…I'm sure it's one of the two…The oldest ninja in the room mused.

"All right. Give me the rundown of his symptoms," she said as the nurse and Akabane took their places at Tsunade's side.

"Of course. First we noticed these," Akabane said taking out a pointer and indicating the red marks on Kiba's ankles and wrists. "he was bound by what we have deduced to be 'fuzzy handcuffs.' The fur left a deadly chaffing completely around each limb. Itchy…"

Tsunade grunted. "Forgive me. Moving on. A similar mark is around his neck, but that came from this," he said lifting a leather collar with a dog tag and the kanji for 'spot' on said dog tag. "After removing his clothing we found his underwear had been cut off by some sort of sharp weapon, as there were light, but non threatening scars, on both outer thighs. Following that," the nurse removed the sheet, "we saw bruises forming from belt buckles. We believe that the perpetrator bound his pelvis with them, along with, nurse," the nurse reached down and lifted Kiba's penis, "as you can see."

"Why there?" Tsunade asked.

"Well, it appears that in a state of arousal when the penis is restricted at the base there is no way for ejaculate to escape. The pressure from base causes the head and length to become infinitely sensitive. In short, the more pressure the more pleasure," Akabane explained.

Tsunade filed that information away, "How do you know that?"

Akabane gave a knowing smile, "I have a few Kunoichi friends who believed that sex and torture was a matter of how many pillows are in the room."

Leaving that image to shiver away Tsunade checked Kiba herself. She noticed he had bite marks along the edge of his penis, which the nurse was still holding, and his neck. As she noticed how tightly both penis and pelvis had been bound she looked at Akabane.

"Did they…uh…"

"Hmmm?" he asked.

Joya decided tact was out the window, "Did they sodomize the bitch?"

This caused Tsume to howl and sob, a truly pathetic and aggravating thing to listen to.

Akabane laughed slightly, "No. the nurse made sure as soon as we saw everything else. It is standard SER procedure."

"Well…that's good. What did you need me for then?" asked the Sannin as she tried to ignore Tsume.

Akabane snapped his fingers, "Oh, there were marks we had a hard time identifying and I was hoping you had an Idea as to what they were. Nurse help me," he said as the nurse let Little Kiba go and helped Akabane roll Kiba onto his side.

As Tsunade saw what he meant her eye began to twitch again. She looked up and glared at her lover. "Joya…would you mind explaining this?" she growled pointing to Kiba's ass.

Both Tsume and Joya, curious, went and examined it. Embedded in Kiba's ass-meat were large welts, circles or holes, by the shape of them. Under the circles was something that made Joya's face blanch. She stood straight and felt her lover's chakra skyrocket.

Tsume looked from them and then looked back at what was on her son's ass. She blinked and then squinted and then looked at Tsunade. "You two know why there's a chibi Hinata on my son's ass?"

Tsunade, whose fists were shaking and begging to be unleashed on Joya rumbled out, "Yes. Yes we do. And Joya is going to explain in excruciating detail why this happened at all!"

Joya chuckled nervously. "Let me say this before I begin: my hypnosis would have worked much, much better if Hinata wasn't so screwed up…"

Xxxxxx.xxxxx.xxxxxX

End of Part 1

Xxxxxx.xxxxx.xxxxxX


A/N: Yep. These past 13 Chapters were all the first part of Entwined Tails. After looking at where I wanted to go with this story I realized that it will take a while. So, when this section of the story is over I'll start on Defiled by Her Blood.

Dictionary:

1 (Baka-ko): Stupid Fox. Because it thought it sounded much better as this.

2 (Tenten's body): The Lemon was an image Kyuubi sent to Naruto in his sleep. Kyuubi could only show Naruto what it had seen itself. so because Tenten had worn dresses like that before Kyuubi knew how to make her body appear to Naruto to screw him up.

3 (The Triplets): Inuzuka Hana's trio of dogs.