Things we would have loved to hear in Stargate Atlantis

Thank the lord it´s drabble time again :)
This is set up for 101 Things, I really hope I can come up with them.

Here are the first 16 ones.

1. Ford
"Um, good Wraith, very good Wraith, do you want, um, a power bar, just sit down, okay? Oh no, you´re not gonna kill me, oh no! Just because I´m a silly sidekick character, right?!"

2. McKay (sobbing)
"Elizabeeeeth, Johnny is sooo mean to me!"

3. Teyla (encountering a planet)

"Oh, yes, the xxxxx – a bunch of cadgers, dumb like shit and smelling worse than a herd of goats in mid july.We should just kill them and take whatever we need."

4. McKay "So, what was the name again? Zenpuka?"

Zelenka punches him

5. Weir
"It´s okay John, these villagers might not have machine guns or any weapons at all, but since their muckrakes look threatening, it´s okay to kill all of them."

6. Zelenka (to McKay)
"If ain´t broken, don´t fix it!"

7. Scientist chick one "Hey, look at my new uniform! Ain´t that one cool?"

Scientist chick two "Bitch! You wear the same one I do!"

8. McKay "And that´s my sister Jeannie."
Sheppard "Nice boobs."

9. Anybody "Um, Ronon, are those scars on your back from the Wraith?"

Ronon "Hell no dude. My wife just sometimes was a bit dominant in bed."

10. Teyla
"Booooooi, that´s sweet dude!"

11. McKay (to Cadman in his head)
"Oh just shut up or I tell Beckett all the things you wanna do with him once you finally got him strapped down on your bed – oh yes, one about whipped cream too!"

12. Beckett (using the control chair)
"Haha! Die you bloody bastards, DIEEEE!"

13. McKay
"Do I look fat in this HazMat suit?"

14. Weir (about Micheal) "So, what do we call him?"

Sheppard "I think I´ll name him Bambi."

15. Sumner (before dying)
"I´m … your … (rattle) father.. John"

16. Sheppard
"Ey, McKay – were´s my puddle jumper?"