The Big Bed

Summary: Hermione Granger believed that every girl deserves some alone time, until she found that being between her two best friends had become routine, and she didn't quite want to break it. Involves more bickering than need be, a bra, and some normal day to day embarrassment.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or Hanes Her Way.

"Did you find anything?"


Ron sighed and looked out the tent flap. The campfire they built earlier in the evening was giving off all the light that Hermione needed. She had been reading the book about Rowena Ravenclaw the entire day, and it worried him just a little bit. She hadn't taken a break and she hadn't eaten anything, that's for sure. Hermione had actually been quite upset with herself for not finding anything about where the Hocruces could be hidden, even though she found the first one rather quickly.

"Enjoying the view?"

Ron tore his gaze from Hermione to look at Harry. "Sod off," Ron muttered, looking back at the book that was in his lap. He absentmindedly ran a hand through his hair and glanced out the tent at Hermione. She was still hunched over her book, reading.

"You hate it too? That's she working way too hard?" Harry asked.

Ron's ears turned pink at being caught staring at Hermione again. He chose to ignore the feeling and answer Harry. "Her schedule is bloody barmy! She doesn't take breaks at all." He closed his book and set it aside. "She should just go to bed. She'll ruin her eyesight with all the reading she does."

Harry just shrugged his shoulders. He loved his best friend's ferocity about reading and finding the Hocruces, but sometimes she over did it, and right now they were all worried about her. Her health was at stake and the Hocruces weren't that important to take that from her.

"What's today?" Ron asked, looking at Harry.

Harry gave Ron a bemused look. "Why?" Without waiting to hear his answer, he moved towards his bag. He had a small calendar with him with the days that they've been on the road crossed off. After sifting through all his things he found it. "It's the eighteenth of September."

"Oh," Ron said, looking out the tent again. Hermione now had her book resting on her legs, and she was stretching. When she was finished stretching she returned to her book, pulling a piece of parchment and quill towards her. She began writing furiously, having no idea that Ron was staring at her. After a moment his eyes grew wide and he looked at Harry again. "You can't be serious?"

Harry's brow furrowed. "Why would I lie? Do you want to see for your self?"

Ron pushed away the calendar that Harry was pushing under his nose. "Tomorrow's her birthday!"

"Who's?" Harry asked.

"Hermione's!" Ron hissed. "Who else is with us with a birthday in September?"


They were silent for a moment, both trying to decide which was easier to do. Make Hermione a somewhat special birthday gift, or forget about her birthday because they were too wrapped up in their Hocruxe search to notice the date. Personally, Ron believed that Hermione would know they knew but forgot, and she'd be royally pissed.

"What are you going to get her?" Harry asked quietly.

Ron shrugged his shoulders. "There's that little village down the mountain…I could get her something from there."

"Like a bra?"

Harry and Ron erupted into laughter at the prospect of getting Hermione a bra for her birthday. It had been rather embarrassing when Ron didn't know what it was, but thinking back on it now, Ron thought it was quite hilarious. Neither of the boys noticed when Hermione's body stiffened and she looked at them. When she realized they were laughing, an anger she hadn't really experienced broke inside her. She stood up and stomped towards the tent, her mind fixed on one thing.

"What are you two doing?"

Harry and Ron stopped laughing and looked at Hermione. Noticing how angry she looked, Ron swallowed audibly.

"How can you two have a good laugh when I'm out there--Studying!" Tears began to fill her eyes, she was so upset. "I've been out there the entire bloody effing day and you're in here laughing? What have you done?" She was screaming at them now, and her body was shaking with rage. Harry and Ron were left speechless. Hearing Hermione swear had taken their ability of speech away from them.

"Well?" Hermione shouted, her hands on her hips. Her bottom lip was beginning to tremble. The tears that were in her eyes were falling, staining her cheeks.

Harry swallowed and looked at Ron. He had no experience with rowing with Hermione and making her cry, but Ron on the other hand was very familiar with it. He watched as Ron stood in front of Hermione, but she turned away from him, storming out of the tent, her arms crossed over her chest. He followed though.

Ron caught Hermione by the arm and turned her around. She tried tearing out of his grasp but it wasn't working. "Hermione," Ron said calmly, looking at her in the eyes.

"What?" Hermione tried to sound angry, but she was failing miserably. All she sounded was hurt.

"We're sorry, we didn't mean to upset you--"

"Well you did Ronald," Hermione said, glaring at him.

"Hey," Ron said, looking at her seriously. "We were just talking and--"

"I don't care!" Hermione said, and Ron could see in her eyes that this went well past them laughing. "I--I--I don't know," she sobbed, staring at Ron. She could see over his shoulder that Harry was inching towards them. She quickly began wiping at her eyes. She couldn't fall apart in front of Harry, she needed to be strong for them…for him.

"I think we need a break," Harry said, walking to Ron.

"But I have so much to do," Hermione said. She wiped the last of her tears from her eyes and pointed to the books by the fire. "I have to finish reading those and--"

"We can help you do that," Ron said, interrupting her.

"But we're not going to do it tonight, or tomorrow for that matter," Harry added. "We're going down to that village and we're going to get cleaned up and sleep in real beds." At the prospect of taking a shower, Hermione brightened up, but she realized that they really couldn't do that. They weren't supposed to spend a lot of money, and staying in an inn would be a lot of money, even for one night. Harry seemed to sense Hermione's uneasiness and smiled. "We'll managed Hermione. Now pack up your things and get some rest, yeah? You need it."

"She needs to eat something first," Ron said, pulling her towards the campfire. "I'll make you something quick. You're going to get stuffed on Mores."

Harry laughed as Hermione tried to explain to Ron that they were S'Mores, and they didn't have any chocolate or marshmallows. But Ron wouldn't hear any of it, and conjured up all the things they needed, surprising both Harry and Hermione.


"How much farther do we have to go?" Hermione asked, reaching out for Ron to help her off a rather large boulder. Ron easily grabbed her around the waist, totally ignoring her hand, and put her on the ground. She flushed slightly and looked away from him, instead looking at the village that was below them. "That's a few hours walk from here."

"Then we better be on our way," Harry said, smiling.

She huffed slightly. "I didn't know I had to work so hard to get on a vacation."

"Vacation?" Ron asked. "I'd call this the most insane luxury, watch your step," He watched as Hermione climbed down loose rocks. "Goodness, vacation isn't even close to what we're about to have-"

"We'll be in heaven," Harry said, following Hermione's lead. Ron was at the end, but he didn't quite mind. His was just surprised that they were actually taking a break from doing the Hocruces, and they were going to be able to take a shower for the first time in ages. He wasn't afraid to admit it, he smelled.



"In order to get to the village, you're going to have to move," Hermione said, staring up at him. Ron just smiled, making Hermione weak in the knees, and climbed down the rocks.

"Let's go then."


"Are you sure you're going to be okay?"

Harry was sitting on a bench in the village, looking at his knee. "It's only a skinned knee Hermione."

"Well, you have a nasty bruise forming."

"I'll be fine. Let's just find the inn."

"I have to go to the post office," Hermione said, moving away from Harry and looking around. "My mum said she'd send a package when it got colder out, and I just want to know if it's come in yet."

"When it gets colder out? That's a heck of a timetable," Ron said, following Hermione as she looked for the post office.

"I'll just find that inn then," Harry muttered, standing up. He winced slightly and began his own search for the inn. It didn't take him long to find it, even though it was in the exact opposite direction of the post office, which was by the bench they had been sitting on.

When he found it, he booked two rooms, a single and a double, but he requested that the single room have the biggest bed and a fireplace. He paid a lot of money for the room because it ended up being like a honeymoon suit. But after checking it out, he was relieved to see that it wasn't a heart shaped bed with silky sheets and a disco ball.

After putting his things in the double, he walked out of the inn and saw Hermione and Ron walking towards him, Ron carrying a large box. It seemed like her parents sent her the package.

"Were you able to get rooms? I know this must have been short notice," Hermione said, following Harry inside.

"Actually Hermione, Harry just stole a key and we're good. They're only Muggles you know."

Harry burst out laughing, sending Ron a side glance. Hermione rolled her eyes at Ron, but her lips twitched just slightly. They continued on their way to the rooms, Hermione becoming slightly giddy. She was talking about the prospect of taking a shower with hot water and washing her hair. When they reached the first room, Ron dropped his things off.

"Where am I sleeping?" Hermione asked, seeing that both beds had Harry and Ron's things on them and there were only two beds. She frowned slightly, thinking she was going to have to sleep on the floor. "Why didn't you get a room with three beds?"

"Because," Harry said, pulling Hermione into the corridor. "It was Ron who actually initiated the thought, since today's your birthday-"

"Today's not my birthday," Hermione argued.

"Today's September 19th," Ron interjected.


"Anyway," Harry said. "We thought you deserved a little something, so we booked you the biggest room with the biggest bed, bath, and beyond."

"You know that's a store," Hermione said, not getting excited.

"Bed, bath and beyond?" Ron asked. "Who would give a store such a silly name?"

"It's actually a large franchise in-Oh my goodness!"

Hermione's mouth dropped open when Harry opened the door. The first thing she saw was a fireplace and a bed. When she stepped in she saw the bathroom because the door was wide open and she nearly screamed. She ran to the bathroom, admiring the large tub and the separate shower. Then she ran out and back into the actual room. She stared at the bed and then she looked at Harry and Ron.

"Get out! I'm taking a shower."

"Can't even say thank you?" Ron asked playfully as Hermione pushed them out of the room.

"Later. That bathtub is screaming my name."


Hermione walked out of the bathroom, grinning to herself. 'I have not been this clean in absolute ages.' She walked to her bed and laid on it, her legs still on the floor. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. After a moment though, she frowned slightly. She opened her eyes and looked around. 'This bed is so large it could fit five Umbridge's and squeeze in Harry's cousin.' She stretched and then sat up. 'I wonder what the boys are doing.' At the thought of not sharing a small space with them, she frowned deeper. She had gotten so used to sleeping between Harry and Ron that it almost seemed unnatural to not sleep between them, and the bed was absolutely enormous.

After thinking about it a moment, Hermione stood up. She walked out of her room and towards Harry and Ron's. She was thinking about the package her parents sent, she hadn't opened it yet, when she walked into Harry and Ron's room.

The color drained from Hermione's face as she walked in on Harry getting dressed. She had been so into her package that she forgot to knock.

"ACK! HERMIONE!" Harry quickly covered himself up. Hermione's mouth fell open and she couldn't move or speak. The bathroom door flew open and Ron walked out of the bathroom with pajamas on, and his wand out and ready.

Hermione couldn't help it. She burst out laughing. She tried to cover her mouth and stifle her laughter, but nothing was working. Once Ron realized that Harry was starkers and Hermione was laughing at him, he shook his head and lowered his wand. Hermione shook her head and walked out of the room, shutting the door behind her.

Harry quickly got dressed, his cheeks turning a bright red color. A moment later Hermione walked back in the room, aware of the fact that she should have knocked.

"You didn't knock again?" Harry mumbled, looking at Hermione.

Hermione bit her lip. Tears were pouring down her face. After a moment she managed to choke out, "Harry, you need a bit of sun," before laughter consumed her again. Ron laughed along with her.

"Ha. Funny Hermione," Harry mumbled, walking to his bed and sitting down. He picked up a t-shirt and then he tossed it over his shoulder.

"I'm sorry Harry," Hermione attempted to be apologetic, but she just laughed it off.

"At least she's not making fun of you mate," Ron said, slapping Harry on the shoulder. "She's only suggesting that you get a bit of sun."

"Yeah!" Hermione added. "Just a bit of sun is all I said." She wiped the tears from her eyes and sat down on the edge of Ron's bed. She could barely make eye contact with Harry in fear of laughing.

Ron shook his head again and sat down beside Harry.

"It's not funny! You saw me starkers!" Harry said.

Hermione shrugged her shoulders. "It was bound to happen at least once on this journey."

"How are you taking this so lightly? What if I walked in on you dressing?" Harry asked, his brows furrowing. His cheeks turned a light shade of pink.

"I'd never expect that from you Harry, but Ron on the other hand…" Hermione looked at Ron. "I always expected it from you, that's why I get dressed quickly and not dilly dally starkers." Ron's ears turned red.

They were quiet for a few minutes, and then Harry said, "At least it's not awkward."

"Yeah…" Hermione said.

It was quiet. An awkward silence had fallen. Hermione cleared her throat and then she looked at Harry. "What did you want anyway?" Harry asked. "Barging in here without knocking, it must have been important."

"Oh!" Hermione said, forgetting the reason why she had come in the first place. "I was just thinking that my room's really big."

Ron arched an eyebrow at Hermione, and Harry mimicked the look. Hermione tried to fight the smile that was itching to burst out. She returned their look and rolled her eyes as Ron said, "I thought girls like having alone time."

Hermione was quick to retort. "Well, most girls don't spend weeks at a time without bathing and sleeping in close quarters with two boys. I've just gotten used to the circumstances we were in." She pursed her lips and stared at Ron.

Ron raised his hands. "You don't have to get defensive Hermione."

"I wasn't getting defensive," Hermione retorted.

"What are you fighting about?" Harry asked. Both Ron and Hermione looked at Harry. Harry smirked when neither answered. "Did you know that you two do that a lot? You fight for no apparent reason. Just like a married couple."

"Anyway," Hermione said, trying to ignore Harry's last comment. "Why don't you two stay in my room? It's too big. Not that I don't like big rooms," she added, seeing Harry's look that she gave him. "But it's strange to have a big room. Like I said earlier, I'm used to sleeping between you two and not alone."

"We're your bad habit," Ron said. "And you can't break us."

"What does that mean?" Hermione asked, turning and looking at Ron. Ron shrugged his shoulders and smiled. He didn't say anything else, and Harry rolled his eyes. If they continued to outrageously flirt like this, he'd have to kill them both. He stood up and gathered up his things, carelessly throwing them into his bag. If they were going to stay in Hermione's room, he'd better cancel this room before they charged him for it.

Ron seemed to realize what Harry was doing because he broke eye contact with Hermione and began to gather his things as well. Harry gathered their dirty clothes from the bathroom and charmed them clean before tossing them into Ron's bag. They could sort through it later. Hermione watched them go about the room. They had been there for nearly an hour and they had already scattered their things all about.

When they gathered everything up, Harry used the telephone to cancel the room. It didn't take long and then they were off, going to Hermione's room.

Hermione opened the door and walked to her bed, plopping down. Ron was next and he sat down on the floor, crossing his legs. Harry walked in and shut the door behind him. He plopped down beside Hermione on the bed and they sat quietly for a few seconds. Then Ron stretched and grabbed the big box that Hermione's parents sent her. Harry slid to the floor and sat beside Ron as Hermione dragged the box onto her bed. She used her wand to open the box, and then she peeked inside. She carefully took out a piece of folded paper, which had her mothers neat handwriting written on the inside.


I'm not sure when you'll get this, but hopefully by your birthday.

Happy Birthday.

Your father sends his love, and hopefully you'll pop in soon. Come for dinner at least once.

There's some things for you in there, and your father and I, along with Molly Weasley bought some things for Harry and Ron. It's all in there, distribute it correctly. I'm sure you'll be able to figure out who's is who's without much trouble. Molly had made that quite clear.

Be careful and try to write.



Hermione smiled and pulled out the first thing she could feel. It was a package of boxers with a pair of bright orange ones. Hermione tossed that to Ron and he caught it without trying. "I think those are yours."

"Thanks. I need some," Ron said, laughing. He set them aside and watched as Hermione pulled more things out. Another package of dark colored boxers for Harry, and a package of knickers for Hermione, which Ron tried to wrestled from her, complaining that she was able to see his boxers and it would be fair for him to see hers. She obviously won, and Ron was sitting on the floor, pouting.

Harry shook his head slowly. If he ever flirted outrageously with Ginny like that, he'd have to kill himself. He watched as Hermione continued to sift through the contents of the box, passing out shirts and pants. He was relieved that someone had remembered about them, because his clothes were getting the usual wear and tear and were falling apart.

Hermione passed out new toothbrushes and toothpaste. There was also dental floss and mouthwash.

"Aren't your parents dentists?" Harry asked, peering at his new yellow toothbrush. He was in need of a new one actually.

"Yeah," Hermione said, wrinkling her nose. She held up what Ron and Harry assumed to be the worst brand of mouthwash. "This burns my mouth so much." Hermione tossed it aside, deciding to ignore it. She looked through the box as if she wasn't interrupted. There wasn't much left, two bras and some little snacks and comfort food. Molly must've found charms that kept food unspoiled because there was muffins and her mother's cinnamon loaves. Muffins and cinnamon loaves were the best comfort food a girl needed.

"Are there any biscuits?" Ron asked, getting on his knees and trying to peer into the box. Hermione pushed the box away from him.

"No, there are no biscuits."

"Why can't I look in there then?"

"She must have something we're not allowed to see. Girly things," Harry's face scrunched up as if he were disgusted. Hermione rolled her eyes at him and Ron laughed. Ron sat back on his legs and looked at Hermione.

"As a matter of fact, they're not girly things," Hermione said, deciding to turn the tables on Harry. If he wanted to make fun of her, she could make the conversation uncomfortable. "If I had girly things, as you nicely put it, then I'd be blushing scarlet. If I had girly things, that would mean my time of the month is near, which technically," Hermione paused, counting up numbers in her head. She could see Harry looking a bit nervous, and Ron looking a bit bemused. He was unsure as to why she felt the need to share this information. "It's in four days, which means that my girly things will eventually come in handy, which means I'm going to have lots of hormonal problems, and I will then only direct them at you, Mr. Potter, for you have made me discuss this out loud." She smirked as Harry paled. Ron looked a bit uneasy now. "But then again," Hermione said, drawing out the conversation longer than need be. "A brassiere could be considered a girly thing, what do you think Ron?"

At the mention of the word brassiere, Ron's ears turned red and he looked away from Hermione, mumbling something. Hermione got a lot of satisfaction of shocking them. The conversations she had to endure while the two boys talked was enough to make any girl go insane, so a little revenge was acceptable at times.

Harry cleared his throat. "Sorry Hermione."

"Thank you."

Ron laid flat out on his back and stared at the ceiling. "Why do we always have to end our days on the bra?"


"What would my mother think of this?"

Ron was laying on his back on Hermione's bed, staring at the ceiling. Hermione was next to him and Harry was on the other side of her. It wasn't as awkward as Ron thought it would be, maybe it was because they had been sharing a tent for most the summer, but it was strange to actually lay beside Hermione and not blush.

"We'd be in so much trouble," Hermione said. She put her hands beneath her head and looked at the ceiling. She was pretty sure that she wasn't going to be able to fall asleep on her back, but she wasn't tired yet anyway.

"Pretty much," Harry added. He rolled to his side and looked at the wall. "This bed is massive."


"I'm going to light the fire," Ron said suddenly, sitting up. "It's a bit chilly." He pulled out his wand from his pyjama pocket and pointed it at the wood in the fireplace. With a quick flick of his wrist flames burst from his wand and into the fireplace. He sat back comfortably and grinned to himself.

"Only you would be proud of yourself for doing that Ron," Harry said, trying not to laugh.

"Oh hush Harry," Hermione said, shaking her head. "You're just jealous because if you would've done that, you'd catch the room on fire."

Harry huffed quietly. Then he rolled to his back. "Move over Hermione! You're taking all the room. You don't need to sleep spread eagled." Ron laughed and inched closer towards Hermione, pushing her closer to Harry. Hermione tried grabbing for something, but soon she was kneeing him in the back. "That's really unnecessary," Harry said. He rolled over to look at Hermione. "I know I made you mad earlier, but honestly!"

"It's not my fault. If Ron weren't pushing me over."

"Ron, you're not supposed to push your girl onto other blokes!"

Now surely, Harry knew, that the next few moments should have been awkward, but what resulted from his impromptu comment shocked him more than it shocked Ron. Hermione rolled over and kissed Ron.

After a few seconds Ron whispered, "What was that for?"

Harry pulled his pillow over his head. "Don't talk about it until I'm sleeping! Just fancy the idea and don't do anything else!" Ron laughed a little nervously, his mind absolutely blank from the kiss. Hermione just smiled at him and Ron smiled back. They didn't really need to talk about it. "And don't you dare try to unsnap her bra either!"

Hermione swiftly rolled over and kicked Harry out of the bed, listening as he fell and hit the floor. Hermione laughed and tossed a pillow to the floor, saying, "You can't honestly say you didn't deserve that."

"I'd much rather sleep on the floor anyway, with you two snogging in bed…"

"Told you," Ron said, laying back on his back. He saw Harry peek over the edge of the bed and Hermione rolled over and looked at him. "We always end our day with the bra."


BB/N: The second part to this! Yay! It's almost as random as the Muggle Contraption…except…this was a bit longer:)

Thanks for the reviews for Muggle Contraption, and onwards to the next bit of this fanfic: The Squirrel King.

Thanks again!

Bob Bennit