First Published: June 19, 2006
"Dallas" and its characters belong to Warner Bros.
Wild Is The Wind, Part 1
me more than one caress
Satisfy this hungriness
Let the wind blow through your heart
And wild is the wind
A low roll of thunder echoed across the Southfork pastures, threatening a storm, enhancing the touch of melancholy Sue Ellen was experiencing. She stood alone in what was once her bedroom at Southfork, unintentionally abandoned by the ladies attending Cally who were now accompanying the bride to the ceremony downstairs. So much like those days sixteen years ago … seven years ago … when it had been her turn to walk down the aisle to J.R.
Sue Ellen quickly banished the thought, wanting no recollection of those days, nothing that would remind her of her life with J.R. Yet from where she stood, banishing memories was impossible. She was surrounded by them.
Taking one last lingering look around her old room, she wandered out into the hall that led to the other bedrooms … to the bedroom across the hall. His bedroom. So many emotions suddenly twisted inside of her, surprising her at how strong they still were. She was supposed to be free of J.R. What the hell was she doing outside his bedroom on the day of his wedding to another woman?
Perhaps coercing an invitation out of his bride had been too much. She thought herself so brave, so clever for wanting to attend the wedding. The scathing confrontation with her ex-husband when she arrived had been deliciously devious, making her feel like there was nowhere else she would rather be. Plus giving Cally the bracelet J.R. had once bestowed on her seemed fitting. It had been his first present of many and she had always cherished the bracelet. Now it was Cally's. Sue Ellen sighed. Perhaps that had also been a bit much.
Giving away the bracelet was supposed to be just another step in exorcising J.R. out of her life completely. Sue Ellen wanted no lingering tokens from him. Yet why did she suddenly feel so hollow? She was proving she could play his game just as well as he could. But standing in the empty hall with the wedding ceremony about to start, the victory didn't seem as sweet as she imagined it would. Probably because his new bride had been the innocent pawn that advanced the wicked game of revenge.
Yes, she has used Cally. J.R. was marrying her because Sue Ellen had coaxed the naïve girl into faking a pregnancy. The plan worked just as expected and J.R. fell for it even though Sue Ellen knew he wasn't serious about her. Cally was like so many others … just another pretty thing he craved until he captured her. But the news of her pregnancy had changed his mind, just as Sue Ellen knew it would. After so many years together, J.R. had become so predictable. What was that old saying … familiarity breeds contempt? Contempt seemed a fitting definition for their marriages. Contempt also refocused her resolve.
It was too late to regret any decision she had made. What was done was done. Besides, it would be better for Cally to learn now how cruel marriage to J.R. could be instead of lingering in the quiet, inebriated pain she had endured for so many years. So much for the joys of being a trophy wife. Wherever Patricia Shepard was at that moment, Sue Ellen hoped her mother would fry in hell for the way she had raised her two daughters.
The sudden viciousness of that thought made Sue Ellen pause, astounded by the bitterness welling up inside her. Did she really wish harm on her mother? Or Cally? Was she so consumed with revenge on J.R. that it was changing her into someone she didn't like? Was it making her too much like him?
That notion was terrifying.
She had accomplished so much the past few years. She had used her brains to generate her own fortune. She was in complete control of her own life now. Yes … she was in control and no longer needed approval from her mother or J.R. or anyone else. Maybe it was time to drop the vendetta against him and finally release the ghosts of the past once and for all.
She looked over at his door. What better place to start than where it had all started.
Checking the hallway, making sure she was alone, Sue Ellen went to the door and turned the handle, knowing it wouldn't be locked. It silently opened, beckoning her inside. After a few steps, she stopped to absorb the atmosphere, overwhelmed by it even now. She had been the one to redecorate the room after the fire at Southfork, knew every inch of it so well. Yet it still had an aura of its own … so masculine and dominating, just like the occupant.
Her gaze fell on the bed and a bittersweet feeling cascaded through her. It was a combination of passion and pain, echoing ecstatic memories when she was the center of his attention and the tortured loneliness she had endured while he was out with his whores. Never again would she share his bed … she was sure of that. Nothing J.R. could do or say would soften what a lying, cheating, murderous bastard he had become. But as much as she despised him now, she couldn't deny what an exceptional lover he had been. She had first experienced what passion truly was in this room with him. It was where John Ross was conceived. A faint trace of a smile curved her lips at the thought of her son. He was the one truly beautiful thing that had come from her marriage to J.R.
Needing to distance herself from the bed, Sue Ellen walked further into the room, looking everywhere as if to commit the rest to memory. Not that she would ever forget. On the dresser, a small collection of his ties formed a muted display of color that caught her attention. In a strange way, it pleased her to see he still retained some she had bought for him.
Sitting her purse down, she picked up one of the sleek strips, allowing it to slide through her fingers one last time. The symbolic irony was too delicious to resist. Her ties to J.R. were nearly severed and it felt wonderful. Just like the fabric. The silky texture generated a delicate friction between her fingers, taking her back in time, reminding her of when she would slip his ties off him at the end of the day. During those rare moments when business no longer mattered. Moments when he was hers completely.
Another clap of thunder sounded, much closer than the previous one, jolting her out of the memory. A tingle of unexplained anticipation swelled inside of her. It felt electric … dangerous … as if he were there with her.
A blue shadow slowly formed in the mirror image behind her. When she refocused on the glass, her gaze locked with the blue eyes she knew so well and a cold chill ran through her, prickling her skin.
He was there. She had been caught.