Disclaimer: Oh, honestly, would I be posting this here if I legally owned it in print?
"Sirius? Sirius!" James half-shouted, closing his book exasperatedly.
"Hmm, Prongs, is that you?" Sirius mumbled.
"Yes, now would you stop snogging your girlfriend already? Wormtail here is about to go in his pants. Would you do it somewhere more private already?" James hissed irritably in an undertone. "I'm getting really annoyed."
Sirius resurfaced from the depths of the couch, smiling mischievously. "If you'd go and snog Evans right now I bet you wouldn't be the one talking." He whispered, and James flushed.
Sirius' girlfriend giggled, and with one last kiss on her mouth, she departed blushingly, traipsing up the stairs to the dormitories. She turned around halfway there and winked seductively toward Sirius' eyes, a small hopeful smoldering look attempting to shine off of her eyes. Remus almost snorted.
Sirius gave a small doubtful laugh as her last footstep vanished. "Yeah, she won't last."
Remus slammed his book shut this time, a small page wrinkling on the impact. He winced slightly, but glared over at Sirius anyway. "That's so cruel, Sirius!" He scolded, almost playful. "If you looked at her at all you could tell that she wanted you."
"I think she kept her mouth parted and her tongue curled the entire time she walked up the stairs. Is seduction a temptation on you, Padfoot?" James observed slyly, making a disgusted face. "Eeh."
"No, of course not," Sirius said smoothly, flicking his hair back. "But I might have trouble staying off myself, personally…"
Remus did snort this time, quietly into his hand. "Couldn't you just lay off of the girls?" He said rather wearily.
"You want me to lay on the boys?"
"You're being incredibly smug and cocky, you know that?" Remus shot at him rather vigorously.
"Remus has a point," James said interestedly. "You can never stay off of the girls. It's like they are attracted to you like a magnet, or vice versa–"
"Hey!" Sirius said hotly, and his voice lowered defensively. "The girls come to me, Prongs, I never go crawling to them–"
"Then you'll participate in my experiment 'Can-Padfoot-Keep-His-Hands-Off-Of-A-Girl-For-A-Week." James interrupted, smirking.
There was a slight silence where Sirius was looking rather destructively from James to Remus to Peter.
"Er." Sirius said shortly.
"Exactly!" James said triumphantly, grinning at Peter and Remus wildly.
"I at least need one girl, James." Sirius explained coolly.
"Then 'Can-Padfoot-Keep-His-Hands-On-Only-One-Girl-For-A-Week'? Hmm, Sirius?" James asked, tilting his head suggestively.
"Uh – perhaps–"
"You won't back down from a challenge, will you, Padfoot?" Remus added in slyly from the other armchair, his book close to him.
Sirius looked positively livid now as his nostrils flared. "Oh, damn you, Potter." He said venomously, eyeing James narrowly. James smiled.
"Are you agreeing?"
"I can't do that–"
"Ten galleons, Sirius." James shot out randomly. Sirius' head snapped toward his.
"What?" He asked disbelievingly. His eyes flickered. "I – fine."
"This is just the beginning, Sirius. Find yourself a bird."
It was Tuesday morning when Remus and James heard mad thundering footsteps from the Great Hall entrance, seeing Sirius roughly steer a short and skinny looking Gryffindor into the Hall. He forced her into the chair, sitting opposite from her at the wooden table.
There was a small silence as Remus looked blankly to James, who looked blankly at the girl. Sirius snarled expectantly at them, waiting for feedback, but they weren't looking at Sirius at all at the moment.
"Good morning." He said stiffly and clearly, and James and Remus turned to face him.
"Oh – er, hi." James said in a forced casualness of a voice. Blindly reaching out into the table to the syrup bottle he knocked over the sugar bowl.
Remus turned to the girl, who was smiling rather toothily over at all of them.
"Aren't you a sixth year?" He asked her wisely, his brow furrowed.
James shoveled the sugar grains off of the table and they scattered onto the floor pathetically.
"No, I'm a fifth year." She said in a very girly voice, and James dropped the syrup bottle, pouring the gew over his plate and onto his lap. Sirius scowled at him, flashing a fake apologetic grin over to the fifth-year.
"Oh, crap, Scourgify – Scourgify!" James hissed, getting up from his seat, where a fair amount of syrup had dribbled onto his pants.
Still swearing, he ran out of the hall, muttering: "I'm changing my pants, I'm not going to Herbology like this." James told Remus.
Remus, horrified, turned to the girl.
"So," He said politely, holding out his hand. She giggled. "Sirius, would you introduce us?"
Her hand slipped into his, smiling. Sirius stopped grinning. Remus flashed a beam over to him, his hand still in hers. This was the perfect situation, for James, at least. Obviously Sirius had not thought about this much – either he hadn't even asked this girl what her name was yet, or he had simply forgotten. Remus coughed.
Sirius smirked at the other end of the table, looking at her almost perfect form. Remus' stomach lurched for no reason. He dropped his napkin.
"I – er, I… I think I'll go help James – with, er… his pants–" He said before Sirius could come up with a witty excuse, and his hand jerked out of hers roughly.
Sirius had no trouble adjusting to his new girlfriend, who was quite an annoyance. James was soon regretting his 'bet' with Sirius. Remus was actually rather surprised that Sirius had chosen his girl so poorly.
"You've never had a better deal, James." Remus said logically, talking to him in an undertone while Sirius and his 'friend' were kissing on the couch. James snorted.
"Look!" He pointed toward Sirius. "He won't be having to switch to another girl anytime soon…"
"She is extremely annoying, James," The werewolf continued reasonably.
"Sirius doesn't have much patience. He'll get annoyed by her just as everybody else – and Sirius needs to have a girl by his side, so he'll automatically look for another girl, hence–"
"I will win." James finished for him, a slight smile tugging at his lips.
Remus grinned slightly, flipping a page of his book. "It's only the girls that are tempted, James… it's not Sirius that is actually tempted."
James laughed a little before giving Remus a friendly pat on his shoulder and stretching. "I'm headed to bed… I still need to fantasize about what I'm gonna do with my ten galleons."
Remus' eyes flickered back to his book, but it wasn't before long where his eyes were back upon Sirius. His stomach sizzled with a small amount of anger before he diverted his gaze back to his book.
Maybe it wasn't only the girls who were tempted.
AN: Hullo! Not much to say! Except for... well, anybody who was in the Kansas/Missouri area got a handful yesterday during the storm. We had a major blackout and I lost my update of 'More Than Just Chronicles'. So I was dispirited and now I'm writing this THREESHOT I've been writing for some time. :D R&R!
JULIA :D ;O :P