Chapter 15: The Wedding
The wedding didn't start until three o'clock, but Taylor had thought it safer to get ready as soon as possible in case Summer needed her for moral support. Hence, Taylor had gotten up at five am to shower and here she was, six hours later, still getting ready. Ben was picking her up at two, and she felt as if time was running out because she still had her hair to fix. Right now, she was putting on eyeliner for the hundredth time, and she still couldn't get it right. Every time it started to look rather well, she would start crying, and the eyeliner would run out all over her face again and mess everything up.
She knew she needed to be there for Summer today as she was the maid of honor, but she also knew it was going to be extremely difficult since her mind was elsewhere. Her thoughts were with the baby and the upcoming abortion, and it scared her to think that she was going to have to go through with it alone. When Summer had heard about the inconvenient date, she'd offered to postpone the wedding or honeymoon, but Taylor felt she couldn't do that, and pretended like everything was going to be fine, even if she and Summer both knew better.
She assumed that she could've asked Kaitlin to come with her on the dark day, because she trusted her enough to know that Kaitlin would never reveal her secret, but she just didn't feel like explaining it all to someone again. She was glad that she had told Summer, because without her, she would probably be a complete wreck right now, but she didn't think she had enough strength to tell Kaitlin everything, to drag up all of the wounds again before they'd even been healed. She couldn't do that.
No, she was going to have to suck it up and do it alone. She was a strong, independent woman and she could do it. Couldn't she?
As doubt overcame her again, she felt tears pressing behind her eyelids. She closed her eyes hard, and with all the willpower that she possessed she forced herself not to cry. She couldn't, not again. She needed to get ready, to fix things. Maybe what she needed was to move. Ryan's presence still lingered everywhere in her apartment, even though he hadn't been there for almost two weeks, and it was a painful reminder of what would never be. She told herself that if she could just get through this day without crying, things would be okay. Tomorrow she would start looking for a new apartment. Tomorrow it would all be over.
If Ryan had thought that he was nervous yesterday, it was nowhere close to how nervous he was right now. Today was going to be the day that he was going to tell Taylor how that he wanted her back and he had no idea how things were going to go. At this point, Taylor most likely hated him and Ryan felt that she was certainly entitled to, seeing how he'd acted towards her and how much he'd hurt her. There was also the fact she had a new boyfriend, and that Taylor, from what Summer had told him, seemed quite happy with him.
The odds were defiantly not in his favor, but he knew he had to try. At least things were defiantly over with Sarah and right now she was on a plane to New York. Throughout their entire relationship, things hadn't exactly been smooth with her. It sometimes scared him to think how much he'd hurt her as well, but today he didn't waste a single moment thinking about her, because his mind was occupied with Taylor through and through.
He regretted screwing things up with Taylor more than he regretted anything else in his entire life. If he ever had the chance to change things, he knew he would do it in a heartbeat, no matter how much it would break Sarah's heart. Because Taylor was certainly worth it. She was the most amazing person he'd ever met. He loved her more than he ever thought that he could love anyone, and he couldn't imagine spending life without her.
These were the things he knew that he had to tell her today, and his hands trembled with a strange mixture of anticipation and fear as he was trying to get his tie right. It scared him out of his mind to think that this was the day that would determine his entire future: living life with Taylor, or without her. A quick glance at his watch made him realize that it was time to make it over to Taylor's if he was going to be able to talk to her before the wedding. He really wanted it over with as soon as possible since the wait was getting to him, and all he could do now was hope.
When Ryan finally made it over to the apartment building where Taylor lived, the first thing he saw was Taylor. As in slow-motion, he watched her walking down the stairs with her shimmering auburn hair pulled back in some sort of loose knot, and wearing a knee-long pink dress, she was so stunning that the sight of her nearly caught Ryan to loose his breath. Not seeing her for all this time, he'd almost forgotten how incredibly beautiful she really was, and it made him wonder how he could ever have spent a day of his life without her in it. This was it. She was it- the one.
The nervousness he'd felt previously ran off him at the sight of her, and was replaced with a sense of confidence he never knew he possessed. He was going to do whatever it took to make her realize that they were meant to be: He had to, because he knew now with certainty that living was merely being alive if it meant being without her. He had nothing to lose anymore. Without her, everything else lost it's meaning, and if he didn't have her, he would never feel alive again.
But as he noticed that both Taylor and Ben spotted him, he suddenly realized that it wasn't going to be as easy as he'd hoped.
Taylor glared at him as she neared Ben's car, parked only a few feet away from where Ryan's was standing. She thought it rather obvious what Ryan wanted and giving him a look that could've killed, she hissed: "Ryan, I'm not going to do this…"
"Taylor, I need to talk to you", was Ryan's only response. He wasn't going to give up.
"Well, I'm kinda busy here," she said in a angry high-pitched voice, barely facing him. "Ben's driving me to the wedding."
Ben had since long realized why Ryan was here, and he didn't like him too much. Taylor had told him everything about how Ryan had slept with Taylor, while still being together with his girlfriend, and since, Ben had considered Ryan an ass."And we're already late, so will you please step over, so we can go", Ben demanded.
Ryan knew by the look on Ben's face that he was probably about to get punched in the face real soon, but he wouldn't move. "No, you can't go," he said foolishly, and turning to Taylor, he continued: "I want to be with you."
Taylor stared at him with what seemed like a mixture of surprise and disbelief. "You do?"
"I do", Ryan nodded calmly.
"Then why didn't you fight for me?" Taylor demanded. Everything she'd been feeling just came out of her and she raised her voice as she said: "You had me, you had me right there, but when I told you Ben had asked me out, you just let me go…I wanted you, Ryan. You. And I wanted you to want me back, to tell me that you loved, or that you'd fight for me…anything!"
She was clearly frustrated and had a very sad, tortured tone in her voice as she yelled at him. She seemed to have completely forgotten that Ben was standing just a few feet away, as she continued a little more calm: "I've always believed that if you really want something, you go after it, you fight for it, and you do whatever it takes to get it. But you didn't fight for me, you just let me go…So how am I supposed to know that I mean anything to you?"
If she only knew just how much she really did mean to him…In reply, he began rambling uncontrollably in a very un-Ryan matter, but he just had to get it all out there, and tell her how he felt. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I didn't fight for you, I'm sorry I didn't tell you how much I love you, but that doesn't change the fact that I do. 'Cause Taylor, I really do love you. I have for a long time and nothing's ever gonna change that. You are insane, babbly, crazy, eccentric, neurotic and everything I never thought I would never appreciate, but I do, and I am completely in love with you." At these words Taylor gave a little giggle, and he could see her almost tearing up, as he looked right at her and continued:
"You make me laugh, and you're special and amazing and beautiful and…everything I need. I can't imagine being without you, and I don't want to either. You mean everything to me and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. And I'm here now, and I'll fight for you, and I'm going to do whatever it takes to make you realize that you're it. You're the one. You're my soul mate. And whatever may come our way, we'll figure it out. And now that I have probably said more words than I have my whole life…will you please say something?"
At this point Taylor was crying again, but smiling at the same time. This was what she had wanted to hear all along, and no matter how much Ryan had screwed up, it was pointless to deny that she felt the same way, because she did. Of course she did, she always had and she always would. Now completely unaware of Ben's presence, in response to Ryan's words, she just walked right up to him and kissed him. Eagerly, softly and passionately at the same time as their lips met each other, he responded to the kiss that they had both been waiting for all this time, and nothing could've been more amazing. This was what love was all about, and neither of them knew how long they stood there, tasting each other, never wanting to let go.
Ben didn't even object. He hadn't developed any real feelings for Taylor during these few weeks even if he liked her a lot, and he couldn't very well argue, because he had never seen two people more in love. He knew he'd been beaten and just stood there for a long time, watching them kiss. Finally, he felt it was time to speak up. "So…I'm gonna take off…Since I guess you won't be needing the ride."
Forcing their eyes and lips away from each other, they just waved good-bye and watched him as he got in the car and drove away.
"Did you really mean all those things you said?" Taylor still had her arms around Ryan's neck when she asked the question, already knowing the answer.
"Of course I did", he replied smiling.
"Good, 'cause there's something I have to tell you", she said, hoping that he wouldn't freak out. "I'm pregnant."
"You are?" he asked in a surprised joyful tone, until he realized that there was something else he needed to know first. "Is it…Is it mine?"
Taylor just smiled. She wasn't sure that she would ever have been able to be with another man after Ryan, and the answer just seemed too obvious. "Come one…Who else's would it be?"
"We're having a baby?" he asked again, still somewhat shocked. Taylor smiled as she nodded happily. That's when it suddenly dawned on him. In a few months time, they would have a little miniature son or daughter. It seemed so surreal, but he couldn't imagine it any other way, and he was suddenly overwhelmed with happiness. "We're having a baby!"
He lifted his pregnant girlfriend up in the air, and they kissed again. They were having a baby, and suddenly even Seth and Summer's wedding seemed insignificant.
When they arrived together, it was just five minutes before the wedding was about to start. Ryan quickly took place at the alter next to Seth, and Taylor rushed into the Cohen house, into Sandy and Kirsten's bedroom where Summer an Kaitlin were getting ready.
"Thank god you're here!" Summer cried in relief as Taylor came through the door. "I told Kirsten I wasn't getting married without you or Ryan present."
"Well, Ryan just came. He drove me here", Taylor said smiling with a look that gave away all too much.
"You arrived here with Atwood?" Summer asked, smiling surprised.
"You guys together again?" Kaitlin wondered. Taylor just nodded, as she just couldn't' stop smiling.
"Oh, my god! Did you tell him about the baby?"
"The baby?" Kaitlin was getting more and more confused by the second. Was Taylor pregnant? She must've missed a lot of thing back at Williams.Again, Taylor just nodded in reply.
"Well...? Give me something, anything!" Summer demanded.
"Summer, you're about to be married in like 5 minutes", Taylor said rationalizing. She would've love to tell both Summer and Kaitlin all about it, but she didn't want to make Summer's wedding day about her.
"So? Just tell me what he said. It's not like they can start the ceremony without me."
"Okay…He said that he loved me, and that he was going to fight for me. That I was his soul mate, the one..." Taylor said, just throwing out some of the random things she remembered. "And he was so happy about the baby…"
"Oh my gosh! Ryan said that?" Kaitlin asked, surprised, but thrilled. She'd always thought that Ryan and Taylor made an excellent couple, even if they were quite a strange match. Taylor just nodded again, this time with a satisfied smile on her face. The girls just kept on talking about it, until Kirsten finally came up in the room and asked them if they were ready to start the wedding now.
They all went downstairs, and walked out in the backyard where Taylor and Kaitlin took place at the end of the altar as Summer's bridesmaids, where Ryan was already standing with a kipa on his head, and the sight made both of the girls smile. Finally they were ready to start the ceremony, and all heads turned as Summer started walking down the aisle, sticking her tongue out as she went, and Seth rolled his eyes at this, smiling just like everyone else. As Summer made it to the alter, she handed her bouquet of white roses to Taylor, and Ryan watched his beautiful girlfriend take them in hand.
And has his eyes searched for hers and when she met them, he gave her a look that clearly indicated: next time, it's our turn. Their eyes locked for a few seconds and she just smiled and nodded, 'cause she knew he was right. They might not have had their entire future laid out in front of them, and they didn't know where they were going to live, or how they would handle having this baby, yet both of them were serene. Everything was going to be just fine, with the baby, with them, with everything. They had each other now, and no matter what the future had in store for them, that was enough.
Author's Note: As we've reached the end of this story, I'd just like to say thank you sooo much for reading this, and thanks to all the reviewers out there. If you haven't reiewed this story, now is the time! Even if it is complete, I'd stil like to know what you think of it.
If you liked his one, you should know that there is a sort of sequel to this story up and running called "Life in Berkeley". Although it features Summer, Seth and Kaitlin as well, it is primarely Rylor and it is the follow-up to this story, picking up just a few days after this ending. If you're an SS fan, you should also know that I have started a SS through the college years story called "True Love Waits". You can check either of them out through my view profile if you can't find them on the site.
Thanks again for reading this story!