Uncle Ianto and Aunty Jack

Based on an insane idea Faramirlover and I came up with playing squash ... that explains why it's so insane, as I just said. Enjoy! Set nowhere in particular (it's hard to judge), as there are certain people who are together and you know how complicated the relationships are on Torchwood ... The pairings are Gwen/Owen and Jack/Ianto.

(The strange thing about this story is I don't like Torchwood. Oh well!)

Disclaimer: Don't own Torchwood or any of its characters. I do, however, own baby Bob.

Gwen yawned widely and stretched, sliding out of her and Owen's bed. She checked the clock on the bedside table - it was half two in the morning. Just quarter of an hour since she'd seen to Bob.

"Owen?"she whispered, "Owen, are you awake?"

There was no reply. Apart from a deep, grunting snore.

Gwen sighed, rubbing her eyes. When she'd married Owen, and when she'd had his baby, he'd agreed to help her out. After all, he loved her.

So far, he'd tried to change baby Bob's nappy once, and ended up with his face covered in -


Oops. Bob'd be waking the city if she didn't shut him up.

Gwen stood up and made her way over to her tiny son's cot. His eyes were shut and his mouth wide open, screaming for something she'd probably never know. He was a beautiful baby, apart from when he was keeping Gwen from a decent night's sleep. She picked him up and rocked him gently, singing tunelessly in the best voice she could muster when she was only partially awake.

Bob cried and cried ...

"Morning," Owen yawned, getting up out of his bed. He looked over at Gwen's side - it was Gwenless.


Where could she have gone? She usually made such a fuss getting up he was pretty much awake too by the time she was out of bed.

He yawned again, rubbed his eyes, and noticed a young woman with dark hair slumped against Bob's cot, asleep, with a squirming, whimpering Bob in her arms.

"Gwen, wake up," Owen said gently, taking Bob off her and placing him on the floor. He'd be fine there for a minute.

Gwen's eyes flickered open, and she murmered something impossible to hear as she slowly woke up.

"Where's the baby?" she muttered.

"He's on the floor."

"WHAT?" Gwen was wide awake as she quickly found Bob and scooped him up into her arms, "Owen, you idiot! Now I know why I'm the one who does everything for him!"

"I know, I know. I'm sorry. You deserve a break, really."

"Too right I do! Does this mean you're going to help out more?"

Bob made a sweet little noise, which unfortunately meant his nappy was about to get a bit wetter.

"No, I was thinking more of dumping him on Jack for a bit or something?"

Gwen sighed, but only half angrily.

"You know, that's not such a bad idea. For an afternoon, anyway ... we could do with some quality time together which doesn't involve someone having to shut up a howling baby. When was the last time we did something ... wasn't it when I was pregnant?"

"No, the other day we went for a walk in the park and Bob was asleep all the way through!" Owen reminded her.

"If you recall, I said 'which doesn't involve someone having to shut up a howling baby'!"

"Oh, yeah ..."

Owen shuddered at the memory of the slimy pond weed and frogs all over him.

"Erm Anyway, I'm sure Jack'll love to take Bobby for a bit. He's not doing much today, is he? Unless of course there's an emergency - which I'm sure there won't be."

"Yeah ... actually I think he's spending the day with Ianto."

"Oh, well ... they'll have fun bonding with Bob. And who knows, maybe he'll help them to bond with each other ..." Gwen stroked Bob's fluffy wisps of hair, "He's certianly helped us, hasn't he?"

"If you say so." Owen stood up, "Now, I'm going for a shower."

"Do you want me to call him, then?" Gwen called after her husband.

Owen turned slowly, a stupid grin on his face.

"Not just a pretty face, are you?" he joked, "Come on, Gwen, I was kidding..."

He set off again for his shower. Gwen watched him leave, thinking. For a joke, it hadn't been that bad. Soothing Bob as he started whimpering, she stood up and picked up her mobile.

A short scene-setter, more ASAP. Which tends to be a long time these days. Well, please say what you thought, as it was my first Torchwood fic!