-Just Like Me-
Kingdom Hearts 2 One-shot by Digitaldreamer
all! I highly doubt any of you know me. I used to haunt this section
way back when it began, back when I was an egotistical brat of
thirteen, when the section only had about ten pages and my writing
sucked to no end. ..Granted, the last bit hadn't changed much, but
overall...yeah, it's been a long time. For those of you who
may remember me, behold, here's proof that I did in fact still
purchase KH2 the day it came out and nearly choked in my own drool
over it's awesomeness. For those of you who have no idea who I
am...be glad. Ignore that little link to my profile up there,
seriously. Unless you are a fan of Psychonauts or One Piece, only
horrors await you. Trust me, you do not want to read any of my old KH
fics. I encourage that the way I encourage an adorable puppy to run
in front of a speeding train; DON'T.
For those of you who may remember me, behold, here's proof that I did in fact still purchase KH2 the day it came out and nearly choked in my own drool over it's awesomeness. For those of you who have no idea who I am...be glad. Ignore that little link to my profile up there, seriously. Unless you are a fan of Psychonauts or One Piece, only horrors await you. Trust me, you do not want to read any of my old KH fics. I encourage that the way I encourage an adorable puppy to run in front of a speeding train; DON'T.
Right, now that that's out of the way...this really isn't that great. It's just a drabble that I suppose is meant to show Roxas' thoughts when he finally saw Sora in that pod at the end of the prologue. I'm sure it's been done before. I just started way back when I first got the game last year, and came upon it in my files earlier this week. I decided "Okay, you know what? I'm going to finish this, seriously." And so I did.
Is it anything special? No, it's not. Do I expect you to review? No, I don't. If this goes completely unnoticed...well, that's okay. Reviews are nice however, so if you want to, feel free to. Overall though, this is just a small tribute to the fandom that really started the path to who I am today. Hats off to Square, and everything else.
Right, on with the fic.
Floating in that shimmering pod, the crystalline petals peeled back to reveal him there. He's like those little fairies in those pictures Olette likes so much. You know, the ones with the tiny creatures floating around the different flowers under the starlight with those serene looks on their little faces? She always squealed over how cute or pretty or whatever they were, heck, she wouldn't shut up about them for the longest time.
Well, I don't really think this is cute. It's rather eerie, really.
"He looks a lot like you."
This is my first time really seeing him…and the Superior was right…he looks a lot like me. Too much like me.
Just like me.
That's my face, the same one I see in the mirror every day. Those are my lips, the ones Hayner would always tease me about and say how girly they look. That's my nose, the one that Olette always liked to flick when I ignored her nagging to do homework. Those are my ears that Pence would always abuse whenever he attempted to sing.
I'm sure if those eyes were open, they would be mine too. Those same sapphire eyes that Axel always said were so damn pretty, far too pretty for a boy…
But they're also his, I guess. Everything I have is also his, should be his. His Keyblade, his fighting style, his power…everything that should be his, I have. They belong to Sora the hero, Sora the Keyblade Master. Not Roxas, the quiet kid in Twilight Town. Not Roxas, the thirteenth member of the Organization. Those things already belong to somebody, and it's not my place to take them.
I'm just a nobody, after all.
"You were never meant to exist, Roxas."
I'm not entirely sure if I should consider that cruel or not. It's true, after all. A Nobody is just that, a nobody. It has no heart; it's only half a person. Any emotions it may have are only memories of what emotions may have been like, they aren't true feelings.
That's why I was in the Organization, right? To find a way to stop being a nobody and become a somebody.
But now…I'm not so sure if I'm still a nobody. I'm not entirely sure how long I was in that Twilight Town, but for however long I was there, for however how long I was just Roxas the kid, it felt like I was somebody. I had friends, people who cared about me, I felt…but were they true feelings? Or were they just simulations?
I'm not entirely sure what to make of all this anymore.
Were those feelings I felt…the feeling of being cared for, of people actually liking me, of having friends, were they all just programmed? Like having a simulated heart? Was that as close as I can get to having friends? As close as I can get to having feelings?
…I kind of wish I never found out it none of it was real.
Today was supposed to be the second to last day of summer vacation. I guess it really is the last day now…quite literally. Well, at least I won't have school tomorrow, right? Good thing, we never did really finish that report…
Ha, that's a laugh. Thinking about school at a time like this.
…It's not fair. Shouldn't I be allowed to have my own life? Shouldn't I be allowed to worry about things like school and friends like normal kids? Shouldn't I be allowed to have my own emotions, my own feelings, my own memories?
I guess not.
The only way I can have those things is by becoming a somebody, becoming whole.
But then...I guess he doesn't really have a normal life either. I should know, I relived it all. I know what he struggled though. I've slain every heartless, saved every world, crossed swords with heroes and villains alike. I've made dozens of friends, cared and was loyal to people whom I have never truly met. I know the life of Sora the hero.
I know all that...and I know that little island that he misses so much as well as if I lived there myself. I know the feel of the warm sun beating down on him and Riku as they splashed through the surf, racing yet again. I know how the sand, still warm from the day, felt between his toes as he listened to ghost stories late into the night, the stars in the sky so far and unattainable. I can remember all the times he fished with them, shared ice cream, laughed and goofed off and only remembered his homework long after dark...
I've felt how much he misses it. How much he longs for it, that every day simplicity, contentment, normalcy. How he wishes his only trouble was still homework and somehow getting an A so he'd be better than Riku at something.
He's Sora the Keyblade Master. Sora the Hero. But he just wants to be Sora the Kid.
...Just like me.
...But he can't have that if he's up there in that pod, can he? He can't continue his journey as the Keyblade Master. He can't go on being the savior of worlds, known everywhere for his courage and kindness. He can't go on fighting, he can't go on being the hero.
And if he can't do that, then that tiny chance that he can someday go back to being Sora the kid...he'll never have that.
Is it really fair...for me to keep him from that out of spite, just because I can't have it?
...No. No it's not.
My name is Roxas. Roxas, the thirteenth member of Organization XIII. Roxas, the Key of Destiny. Roxas, the Struggle Champion from a Twilight Town that never was. Roxas...the kid.
I'm nobody. But Sora...Sora needs to be somebody. So I'll do it. I'll give back these borrowed lips, this borrowed nose, borrowed ears, borrowed eyes...everything. I'll stop being a nobody so he can be who he needs to be.
Sora cannot sleep anymore. He's still got a long, long road ahead of him. He needs to be the hero. He needs to be the Keyblade Master. But above all...he needs to be able to be a kid, once this is all done.
Just like me.