Yes, it is a lovely ring, isn't it?

No, there are none others like it. There are rings held by the elves and dwarves and men, but all exist merely to be inferior to my One Ring. My...precious...

Yes, I like it. I wear it, do I not?

I made it with my own hands. Flame and molten gold and the pounding of metal...I was taught my skills of the forge by Aulë countless millenia ago...skills I later perfected and improved while in the service of beloved Melkor and later, as the new dark lord of Middle-Earth after He was sent into the Void. Aulë pounds metal—I craft metal. My ring was my greatest masterpiece. I refuse to improve (if such a thing were possible!) and make obsolete my ring—

I am not stroking it. Merely cleaning it of dust so that it shines properly.

I put much of my power into the ring. When I wear it my powers are increased, and I have dominion over the others. Yes, the Elves discovered my intentions. But they do not matter. I still have my precious...

I do not mean "precious" literally, of course! 'Tis merely hyperbole.

See how it shines? Behold—the writing on it's curved surface. It is very beautiful, is it not?

No, I do not think wearing it in sleep or at bath is strange. I might lose it if I take it off. That would be terrible, no? Besides, I need it to be complete. I put most of my power in it after all.

No, I do not think that was a power-mad, reckless decision.

Yes, if I lost the ring I would be quite displeased.

No. Of course I would not go that far to get it back! That would be very reactive. It's only a ring, after all.

Why? Is someone planning to take it from me?