How Was I Supposed to Know?

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. Sorry Folks.

Author's Note: This is a one shot about Harry Potter and his precious person. Though it came about through real life experience. This is dedicated to my precious person, who has done more damage than he can imagine.


How was I supposed to it would come to this? That I would give you this choice and make you choose.

I know you're wondering what brought this on. I guess it's always been there, a secret fear, worming through my heart, until I finally snapped.

I could want someone else, I could need someone else but I don't and I don't want to.

But it's up to you now. Your chance to follow heart. Do you want me? Need me? Or is it someone else on your mind?

I'm walking away for now, giving you space to think. Take as long as you need, even though I have no idea how I can take it.

In the end, you know where to find me. Call me when you've come to a decision, good or bad.

In the end, as long as I know for sure. I can't take the uncertainty any longer.

Until I see you again, know that I love you; I'm in love with you. I say it, not to influence your decision, but to let you know the truth.

Take all the time you need.

All of my love, forever and for always,


Harry stared down at the letter he had just finished. He squeezed his emerald eyes closed and took a deep shuttering breath.

Biting his lower lip, Harry folded the letter in half twice and smoothly wrote out who it was addressed to.

His emerald eyes focused on the sheet before he scowled and scrubbed away the tears that had begun to fall without him noticing.

Harry breathed on the parchment and whispered. "Go to him."

The parchment lifted from the Boy-Who-Lived's hands and disappeared with a silent pop.

"I'm sorry." Harry stared down at his left arm, where the sleeve was pushed up to his elbow. Engraved into his skin was the word LOVE. He delicately ran his long fingers over the old scars. With a deft movement he jerked the sleeve down to cover the arm.

"Whatever you choose." Harry rose from his desk and walked to his bedroom, he was exhausted, and he hadn't slept in days.

Severus Snape sat in a black leather arm chair, before a roaring fire, with a glass of blood red wine in one hand and a leather bound book in the other.

His eyebrows shot to his hairline when a parchment suddenly appeared in his lap. He closed his book with a snap and set both the book and the wine on the dark wooden table at his side.

With long pale fingers Severus unfolded the parchment. 'Harry?' He would recognize the young man's writing anywhere.

Onyx eyes widened with each word he read. "Harry?" His breath came out in a hoarse whisper.

By the time he had finished reading the parchment escaped from limp fingers and fluttered to the floor as Severus stared in to the fire, finding it hard to breath.

When the information from the letter finally sank in Severus lunged from his chair and raced from his chambers and through the halls of Hogwarts. He slid to a halt before the door to Harry's personal rooms.

"Harry!" Severus shouted and banged his fist against the thick wooden contraption.

At first there was no response and Severus began to panic. He lifted his fist to bang again but the door flew open.

With a cry of relief he lunged into the room and scooped Harry up into his arms. "Harry!"

"Severus?" Harry breathed softly.

"I'm so sorry, so sorry." Severus slid to the ground hitting his knees, taking Harry with him. "I never meant to make you feel that way."

"Severus." Harry hung limp in the Potions Master's arms. He was to afraid to hang on, knew if he did, he would never let go.

"I love you Harry."

Harry sucked in a breath. "Love?"

"Yes you idiot! I love you." Severus pulled back to look Harry in his beautiful emerald eyes.

Harry blinked and tears began to flow down his cheeks.

Onyx eyes widened. "Harry, what's wrong?"

Harry smiled a watery smile. "Nothing, nothing's wrong."

"But you're crying." Severus gently wiped the tears away with his calloused thumb.

"I'm happy." Harry leaned into Severus' touch.


"Yes." Harry halted Severus' next question with a tender, loving kiss. He drew back to look into onyx eyes filled with wonder.

Emerald eyes danced with life once again. "I love you too."


Alright the first half was based, mostly, on things that have happened, and the second was things I wish would happen.

Please read and review, I would appreciate it.

Oh and I will be updating my other story, Harry Potter and Sanity's Requiem as soon as I possibly can. Thank you all for the reviews and support on that story, I really appreciate it.