-LXRaito yaoi. (MALE-MALE situations. no flames excepted.)
-Summary: After complete exhaustion, Raito gets a fever. Since he is chained to the boy, Ryuuzaki feels it is his duty to get Raito better quickly in his…own way. four.
! i find myself wanting to finish this. the chapters are going to come quicker than i thought.
! three pepsis are necessary for each chapter since i write late—you're all making me broke.
! i'm being called '–sama'. if fluffy porn stories earn me respect then by all means i will write by heart. :)
-Disc: i do not own Death Note. there would SO be more sex.
"If I die, would you take over for me?" Ryuuzaki asked, not looking back at the brunette who stood behind him. If Raito was Kira and all of this was merely just an act, the younger man would definitely say yes—that, Ryuuzaki was sure of. Instead, the detective was merely replied to by the jingling of a chain.
"What are you talking about, Ryuuzaki?" he heard the man behind him say. "As long as we have this we die together, right?" The statement was so noble that it almost made Ryuuzaki frown. There was a long pause before Raito spoke again, his voice dabbed with a saddened tone.
"Oh, I get it."
This time Ryuuzaki frowned.
"Sorry Ryuuzaki, but I'm going to tell everyone what you were thinking," Raito continued. "If I am Kira, Ryuuzaki is assuming one of the two possibilities. First, that I'm putting on an act and faking that I'm not Kira, or that Kira's power has been passed to someone else and I have no memory that I was Kira." There was another light clanging of chain. "If it's the former and I'm acting…then these handcuffs will never come off. I cannot be allowed to be free again. Actually, he probably won't remove the handcuffs for the other theory either." Ryuuzaki could feel the questioning looks on the other's faces, but the detective still said nothing nor looked behind him.
"Ryuuzaki thinks I'm Kira and even if the power has been passed to someone else…," the brunette said as he looked down at the back of the man's head. "He's assumed that I have set things in a way that the power will eventually return to me. So I wasn't controlled, it was all a plan to pass the power to someone else and gain it back when I'm no longer a suspect."
The black-haired man was astonished despite everything, not knowing by any ounce of him how this man could so accurately describe what he was thinking. It was downright supernatural; if you believed in that kind of thing.
"Light Yagami could become Kira while also being L; that's what Ryuuzaki is thinking."
"Correct," Ryuuzaki replied.
"To gain the position of L and be able to freely control the police around the world while being Kira behind the scenes, that would be the ultimate position. You're saying that I could do it, no, that I'm trying to do it."
"Yes." Ryuuzaki didn't like short answers, but there was nothing else to say. It was only a matter of time before the statements of defense arose.
"But what about now? You should at least realize now that I'm not acting."
He knew it.
Really, saying plans out loud did not constitute as a reason to lessen suspicion. Suppressing a sigh, the detective finally spoke. "If you were planning on taking over the role of L, then you wouldn't be revealing it in front of everyone…is that what you're implying?"
"Yeah," Raito replied. "And if Ryuuzaki, well, if L were to die while I continued to live and Kira suddenly disappeared, you'd just need to have Watari or a third party determine that I was Kira. For the other possibility, say that it's true that I sent the power to someone else and plan to have it return in the future. If that's the case, the assumption is that I've lost my memories of being Kira, correct?"
It was getting awkward, hearing all this. "Yes, that's the only way it would make sense."
Raito gave a small sigh, his patience wearing thin. The detective was so inconsiderate that it almost disgusted the younger man, Ryuuzaki's earlier plan to let innocent people die to find Kira less than flattering. The mass murderer was running amuck in Yotsuba while Ryuuzaki instead tried to weasel his way into a confession from Raito. This wasn't right; a person couldn't be this heartless.
Ryuuzaki felt a hand on his shoulder, the grip pulling him around in his chair until it swiveled to face the brunette. Auburn eyes met surprised raven ones in a stare.
"Ryuuzaki," Raito looked so serious all of the sudden. "If I capture the current Kira, after that do you really think I would become Kira, become a murderer? Do I really look like that kind of person?"
They continued to gaze at each other.
"Even now, in this kind of condition, you would still accuse a man of being a mass murderer? You are a heartless person."
"May I kiss you?"
"You're trying to force things out of me by way of emotion,"
"However, that does not mean that I am incapable of things like lust…or love."
"So you have the ability to trick people, Raito-kun. That is not a good thing."
"Raito-kun, why do you care? Why has your mood changed so suddenly?"
"Nothing has changed between us."
"Why not try again when you can care about another human being?"
"I love you."
There was a small shine in Raito's eyes that Ryuuzaki had never noticed before. Innocence?—No, it was hard to tell.
"That's what I think, and that's how you look."
The dark-haired man watched as their stare was broken by Raito's eyes sliding shut, face contorting into annoyance and disappointment. In an instant, Ryuuzaki felt the force of the younger man's fist in his face, the familiar pain running through his head. His foot had connected with Raito's face, he could feel it. However, in the end all he did was grin.
"Alright!" they heard Matsuda yell, neither one completely listening and instead assuming stances for another blow at each other. "Once is enough! Let's just end this at a draw."
Despite the reoccurring fatuity that Matsuda was usually known for, it did make sense to stop the brawl at that time; they could sort it out later. Raito turned away from Ryuuzaki, quickly submerging his rage and returning to a nonchalant state. He wiped the edge of his mouth. "Y-Yeah. Anyway, let's just capture the Kira that's in front of our eyes. You can't complain as long as I have the handcuffs on."
Ryuuzaki licked at the small amount of blood on his lip. "Yes, we only have one month."
Matsuda sighed of relief, Souichiro not saying a word.
Raito halted in his repetitious typing, looking out of the corner of his eye to the small plate that had been placed on the desk. It was a small slice of strawberry cake, the actual fruit resting on the top, held in place by white frosting.
"I take it that you are still angry with me?"
The younger man didn't respond, pausing before continuing to work his fingers on the keyboard. He felt black eyes bore into his skin as he ignored the other man and then the sound of a chair being brought over beside him. Peripheral vision allowed him to view Ryuuzaki sit in the seat in his odd way, climbing into it one foot at a time, the detective biting his thumb omce he was rested. "I am sorry that I am pulling Misa into all of this, but you do understand do you not?"
He was more upset with the fact that Misa had willingly shoved herself into the Yotsuba situation right after Ryuuzaki asked her; no thought at all. But still…
"You have no reverence for my opinions whatsoever," Raito replied, stopping his typing once again to move his right hand to the computer's mouse. "You don't care."
"But, I gave you cake. That is caring, Yagami-kun."
Raito rolled his eyes. "Ryuuzaki, my feelings are of no importance to you. Therefore, I don't need to understand."
Ryuuzaki continued to bite his thumb, obsidian eyes staring at the man even though the look was never returned. So Raito did want to talk about it…
"Raito-kun," The informality caused the younger man's gaze to shift away from the computer but not entirely toward the other man. Ryuuzaki was hesitant as he spoke. "I do not think that my statements to you earlier were completely dependable. You are Kira, this I know, but I do not wholly believe you are the kind of person who would become such a thing after capturing the Kira we deal with now. Then again, it is only a belief."
Raito finally looked at Ryuuzaki, completely expressionless. "Yet, I am still Kira."
"Yes, you are."
"So what does that mean?"
Ryuuzaki's thumb slid from his mouth, the man resting it back on his knee and leaning forward in his chair.
"It means that you mean nothing to me."
Ryuuzaki got the expression that he was expecting in reply. Auburn eyes widened slightly, the rage that they harbored turning the irises darker in shade. Ryuuzaki reached forward, sliding the plate he set on the desk closer toward Raito. "Now please, eat."
A wave of pain washed over the detective as he felt Raito's foot connect with the side of his face, Ryuuzaki and the chair tumbling onto the floor. The distance the older man went with the blow caused Raito to be pulled roughly to the ground also, his fall landing mere inches from the dark-haired man. The brunette scrambled quickly onto his hands and knees, crawling to where Ryuuzaki lay sprawled on the floor and climbing over top of him. Straddling his hips, Raito grasped handfuls of the cloth of the detective's collar and pulled him up, closer to his face.
"How the fuck do you keep lying to yourself?! This is all just a great façade—clinging onto these notions that I'm Kira even though clearly I'm not! You are a heartless man that is incapable of affection and that's all you'll ever be!" Raito felt like he was on the verge of tears and his throat began to hurt as he held them back.
"That is untrue," Ryuuzaki murmured, grasping Raito's hands on his shirt, loosening them until his head rested back on the floor. His chest felt so heavy. "You mean nothing…"
"It's all a lie—a lie so elaborate, that you have no choice but to go along with it."
"This Kira case…"
It hurt. His throat was swollen with a lump.
"You won't focus on the things in front of you, just whatever puts me under suspicion."
His nose began to tingle.
"What the hell has made you be so cold towards me?!"
He snapped. Ryuuzaki raised himself on his elbows, glaring straight into brown eyes.
"Because you care Raito!"
Raito halted all argument, all speech stopping to leave just silence. Rage slipped instantly away from his being as he looked into the older man's eyes, watching as pools slowly formed in the corners.
Ryuuzaki was crying.
He watched as the man under him slowly realized this also, the detective lying back down onto the floor. Shaking hands made their way up to his face, covering obsidian orbs from the brunette's view while halting trails of tears that were beginning to stream down his cheeks. Raito was still frozen into place, completely shocked by the display.
"You care. I want to…my life, their lives," Ryuuzaki's speech was broken and shaky, the man obviously struggling to calm himself down. Raito still hovered above the man, brows furrowed and trying to understand what he was saying.
Suddenly, it all clicked.
Ryuuzaki did care about Raito. However, there was always going to be the threat that the power of Kira could be passed around and could, in some instance, be given to Raito. It wasn't that Raito was Kira, it was Raito might become Kira.If that were the case, if Raito would become the new Kira, there would be nothing to stop the younger man from removing every obstacle in his path and continue killing people. Ryuuzaki feared for this almost every day, there was no telling when something like that could happen. In the end, if the detective L were to get involved with someone who could eventually become Kira, Ryuuzaki was afraid that he would not be able to stop the new Kira because of this affection. Therefore, Ryuuzaki might be in the mood for pleasure, but love was what he would push away.
It was perfectly reasonable.
And the younger man felt absolutely horrible.
Shifting himself down a little on Ryuuzaki's lithe body, Raito lowered himself slowly until he lied lightly on the other man, resting his head on the detective's chest. He brought his hand up to play with the cloth of the man's collar that he had stretched out, Ryuuzaki's heart beating loud and fast against his ear. They lay there in silence, the younger man relieved that the other hadn't shoved him away as he waited for Ryuuzaki to accept his offer of comfort. It was a long while before the brunette felt a skinny arm wrap around him, but he was wholly content at the gesture of forgiveness.
Raito mustered up as much courage as he could to speak, his tone tentative. "Ryuuzaki," he started. "I'm…sorry. I didn't understand until I thought about the information that we talked about and—"
"Raito-kun, do not talk," Ryuuzaki interrupted. The brunette looked up to see that the man was rubbing his temples, pale skin moving in circles under bony fingers. "It actually hurts very much—you need to stop overreacting. You are too dramatic, like a girl," Ryuuzaki paused before adding: "A girl who can kick."
The brunette said nothing at first. Smiling lightly, Raito raised himself from Ryuuzaki's chest, retaking his position hovering over the man under him. He leaned down slowly once again, pushing the older man's lips into a kiss that lasted for no more than a few seconds.
"You really are a bastard."
beginning scene is volume six.