A/N: For the first time, I believe, this is not a oneshot! It'll have a few chapters, all I'm going to try to put up immediately. I've been receiving more comments lately. Let me say, thank you so much! I really appreciate the feedback from my readers!

Disclaimer: I do not own Lfn

Love through the Years

I've just arrived back at my office after having coffee with my material. With Nikita.

I should be home right now. Tucking Adam in to bed. Kissing Elena goodnight. Instead, I called the house and said work was keeping me over tonight. That it was impossible to make it home.

I can't go there. Not tonight, at least.

Everything about me aches. But most of all, my heart bleeds. Simone died three years ago.

She died again today.

This time, there was someone there to reach out and distract my guilty mind. Before, I was alone to wallow in my heart wrenching grief. Not this time. I don't deserve the patient, caring look she flashes me every time I fall silent. Or look away. Even if I take a sip of coffee.

She feels sorry for me. She cares. She shows it.

I never liked pity. But I didn't mind it today. It was heavily disguised.

She paid for the coffee before I had a chance to. She drove. She picked the place. She took care of everything. I didn't have to put thought to a single detail tonight. I just had to sit there. Listen to her soothing words.

I never had someone who paid so much attention to my silent messages. Most people can't understand me. I relish in that. But some how, she slips under the radar. She can see through my facade. Straight to the pain that lies underneath.

I don't know how she does it, but she does. She's under my skin.

And now I know.

If I'm not very careful, she'll find a way to my heart.

I can't let that happen. Not again. Never again.

I couldn't bare to lose another. I've had two days of pure hell from losing a loved one in my adult life. I'll never go through another day like today. Ever again.

I'll make sure of it.

If I keep thinking it, I'm sure my heart will follow through. There's not much left of it anyway.