Aspersion
Fandom:
Kingdom Heart II
Pairing: AkuRoku
Rating: PG13
Summary: "You can't feel. I can't feel. To us, without a heart, there is no such thing as love." AkuRoku.

"It's true."

Axel words remained firm despite the situation. It was true, he had no need to lie. His eyes locked with Roxas back, waiting for the younger man to say something.

Silence passed over the nobodies, leaving Axel with an empty feeling inside. (Aren't I always empty? After all, I have no heart.)

"Don't lie." Was Roxas soft reply, edged with bitterness. "We both know it cannot be true. A nobody has no heart. A nobody can't feel. We can't feel." Axel bit his lip, knowing that Roxas was right. The facts proved what he said. He didn't have a heart yet how could he still feel this ?

"...what am I feeling then?" (What is this warm feeling of happiness I experience whenever I'm around you? Why can I feel this around you?)

Roxas gaze wandered to stars that hung brightly in the sky, "Nothing." (Because that's all you and I can feel.)

Axel's anger grew, he knew what he was feeling. Roxas had no right to say what he felt and what he didn't feel. "I know how I feel about you damnit!" (I've known. I've always known. You don't know.)

(We both can only know so much. After all, we both don't have a heart.)

Roxas turned swiftly, his eyes hard. "No. You think you feel something for me. But you don't because you can't. You make yourself think you love me when we both know the truth. You can't feel. I can't feel. To us, without a heart, there is no such thing as love." (Only emptiness.)

Axel felt a hard lump in his throat, knowing the facts were on Roxas' side but he knew he was right. He did love Roxas. And it didn't matter that Roxas disagreed with that statement because he still knew how he felt. "Maybe.." Axel started slowly, trying piece together something; anything that would make sense to explain how he felt, "Maybe you don't need a heart to love." (Maybe. Maybe.)

Roxas gazed didn't waver, he stared intensity at Axel, as if urging him to go on. Roxas wanted it to be so, he wanted Axel to find a reason to make it all make sense. Though, he his heart (No, in my head. I don't have a heart.), he knew; no such reason existed.

Axel racked his brain for something, he needed to make Roxas understand. He just needed too. And then, suddenly, the answer hit him.

"Maybe all you need to love is that person."

Roxas gaze moved towards the ground; it wasn't a good enough reason. Roxas opened his eyes; they seemed harder than before. (Why do your eyes go harder every time I say 'I love you?')

(Because it's a lie.)

(I've never lied to you.)

"You're fooling yourself." That was all he said before he walked away silently.

(You may not lie to me, but you lie to yourself.)

Axel watched Roxas back fade into the distance, like he was slowly fading into the darkness. Even if he was fooling himself, he didn't mind. Because if fooling yourself; lying to yourself, made you happy; made you feel, then Axel would fool himself any day.

Though, as he continued to watch Roxas walk away and be swallowed by the darkness. He wished he didn't fool himself. Because, maybe, if he couldn't feel, then the pain that tugged at his heart wouldn't be there. And maybe the bliss of ignorance could save Axel. Though, he had no such luck. (Feel. Feel. I feel something for you.)