A/N: Birthday giftfic for Puck Off who is no-longer-jailbait and thus has Genma after her. She knows she loves it, even if she denies it :P Happy birthday, Puck Off!
Disclaimer: K. Masashi gave them to me. I swear. There was no gun involved or anything, honest. (coughs)
Play With Me.
Uzumaki Naruto fell down onto his plush couch with a deep sigh, closing his eyes. The drummer of a newly popular band was exhausted, and tired of having to buy new shirts. Every time he went out in public, girls screamed and made a grab for him, which led to him having to escape, ripping his shirt in the process, since the girls had their greedy hands all over him.
He let out another sigh as he opened his eyes, seeing a magazine on the table in front of him. It had a picture of their band on it and he frowned as he noticed it said there was an interview.
Interview? I don't remember doing an interview recently. He leaned forward, picking it up, and flipping through the pages. Everyone was out right now, but he didn't think they would care if he was reading one of their magazines.
He liked living with his band, it made things easier when it came to writing new songs or rehearsals. It was hard sometimes, since they were all different, but they managed. Naruto and Inuzuka Kiba played video games, Sabaku Gaara locked himself in his room, and Hyuuga Neji and Uchiha Sasuke bitched and complained about how messy the house was. Whatever, it was still fun.
Naruto found the interview page and his eyebrows disappeared into his hairline. He held the magazine closer to his face, as if the distance was the reason he was reading the headline wrong. But he wasn't reading it wrong.
What the members of Kyuubi think of their band-leader.
Naruto practically hurled the magazine across the room before bringing his knees up to his chest. He stared at the glossy paper, his stomach rolling over. That was why he didn't recall this interview; he hadn't been there.
He wondered if he really wanted to know what the other four thought of him, but kept insisting it was a bad idea. If any of them had said something bad about him, there would be problems. But then... the magazine... it was just sitting there.
"No!" Naruto slapped both hands over his eyes to stop himself from looking at it, but then separated two fingers to peek through. The magazine was just sitting there innocently. Or maybe it's not sitting there innocently! Naruto accused it internally as he glared down at it. Maybe it wants me to think it's sitting there innocently when, in reality, it's beckoning me. Calling to me, and telling me to betray my friends by reading whatever juicy goodness may lie between its glossy pages.
Not that Naruto could tell, but he was slowly losing his mind. Because he so badly wanted to read that interview.
"God, just do it." Naruto snapped to himself as he stood and picked up the evil paper, staring at the cover. Taking a deep breath, he opened it to the right page and sat down on the small coffee table to read. The first thing he noticed was that they had gone for this interview the day they'd all said they were going to see The Grudge 2.
"Those bastards." He narrowed his eyes. "I was wondering why that chicken-shit Kiba had agreed to go."
He kept reading, scanning the questions and the answers given by his various friends. Sasuke only answered once or twice by the time the interview was coming to a close, even though there had been over twenty-five questions asked so far.
Haruno: You've been pretty quiet over there, Sasuke.
Uchiha: You haven't asked the right questions. Haruno: Oh? What kinds should I ask? Uchiha: You're the interviewer. Haruno: Haha, of course. Well, then, Sasuke: how do you like Naruto? Uchiha: On his back, moaning.
Uchiha: You haven't asked the right questions.
Haruno: Oh? What kinds should I ask?
Uchiha: You're the interviewer.
Haruno: Haha, of course. Well, then, Sasuke: how do you like Naruto?
Uchiha: On his back, moaning.
Naruto blinked, re-reading the last line a few times. He was sure his eyes were playing tricks on him, but every time he re-read it, the sentence said the same thing. Naruto felt a cold sweat make its way down his back. He spun around instinctively, scanning the area, but the apartment was silent and empty.
He turned back to the magazine, swallowing hard as he continued to read.
Haruno: What do you mean by that?
Uchiha: It's obvious, isn't it? I don't know how much clearer you want me to be. Inuzuka: Didn't you know? Sasuke is gay. So is Neji. Hyuuga: I don't recall giving you permission to disclose that information. Inuzuka: Oh, stop being such a damn lollipop.(1) Now all the other gay guys out there can have wet dreams about you—not that they didn't before, but you know... this time you'll be more actively involved. Haruno: So—wait. You two are gay, and you, Sasuke, love your band leader? Uchiha: That about sums it up. Inuzuka: He's trying to convert him. Naruto is bi-sexual, but he leans seventy-thirty towards women. Poor guy's got his work cut out for—
Uchiha: It's obvious, isn't it? I don't know how much clearer you want me to be.
Inuzuka: Didn't you know? Sasuke is gay. So is Neji.
Hyuuga: I don't recall giving you permission to disclose that information.
Inuzuka: Oh, stop being such a damn lollipop.(1) Now all the other gay guys out there can have wet dreams about you—not that they didn't before, but you know... this time you'll be more actively involved.
Haruno: So—wait. You two are gay, and you, Sasuke, love your band leader?
Uchiha: That about sums it up.
Inuzuka: He's trying to convert him. Naruto is bi-sexual, but he leans seventy-thirty towards women. Poor guy's got his work cut out for—
"What are you reading?"
Naruto shrieked like a girl as he flew off the table, throwing the magazine in the air before turning around. As if to mock him, the magazine landed face-up on the table. He was too busy hyperventilating to glare at it.
"Oh, Christ, finally." Kiba rolled his eyes as he headed for the stairs. "We've only left that sitting there for two weeks."
Neji came around the couch and snatched up the magazine, frowning at the cover. "I hate this picture. They did it to spite me."
"You did yell at the photographer." Kiba laughed as he continued up to the second floor of their Penthouse suite.
"Does Sasuke know you left that there?" Naruto asked, unnaturally pale.
"Are you kidding me?" Neji smirked. "He's the one who offered to buy the magazine."
Whatever colour remained in Naruto's face was quickly drained, and it didn't help that the front door opened just then to admit Sasuke and Gaara. The blond bolted for the stairs at top speed, climbing them two at a time before disappearing into his room. After having locked his door, the sound of drumming exploded throughout the apartment.
The two who'd just entered cocked an eyebrow, and Neji's only answer was holding up the magazine so both could see.
"Oh Naruto." Sasuke grinned as he looked towards the stairs. "Never before have you been so close to being mine."
He let out a low, evil laugh.
It was close to three in the morning when a lock was heard and a door opened, a blond head poking out and looking up and down the corridor. All the doors were shut and no light could be seen coming out from under them. Heaving a relieved sigh, he snuck out into the corridor and descended the stairs, his stomach growling.
Naruto hadn't left his room since Sasuke had come home. He'd been all right bathroom-wise, but he was starving. Which was why he was currently sneaking down the stairs to get food. He had to sneak, because Sasuke was a light sleeper. He didn't know what the raven had planned for him, but he'd rather not find out until he was sure he could handle it.
He entered the kitchen and wandered over to the fridge, opening it and using the dim light to see around the room. He couldn't think of anything to eat that would be decently quiet and easy to make, so he huffed, standing in front of the fridge with his arms crossed, and tapping one foot on the ground.
"I know! Cereal!" he whispered to himself as he headed for the pantry, squinting to see the cereal names, since the light barely made it that far. He finally gave up and grabbed a random box, smiling as he noticed they were Lucky Charms. He loved those little marshmallow things.
He grabbed a bowl, filling it with cereal before replacing it in the pantry. He then went to the fridge, grabbing the milk, and turning around.
Naruto had a heart attack as he dropped the milk, clutched his chest, and leaned against the open fridge door. It was easy to scare Naruto because of his wild imagination, but when someone snuck up behind him looking frighteningly similar to the Grudge girl only with shorter hair—well, suffice it to say Sasuke was lucky Naruto hadn't died, or he'd have been charged with murder.
"Christ, don't do that to me!" Naruto hissed as he struggled to calm his heart.
Sasuke just smirked as he headed for the pantry, pulling out the mop. Naruto bent down, grabbing the fallen milk carton and pouting. It was practically empty, now.
"Be more careful, idiot." Sasuke handed him the mop. Naruto stared at it before hesitantly reaching out to grab it. The second his hand closed around the handle, Sasuke's other hand grabbed Naruto's wrist and yanked him forward. The blond once again dropped the milk as he found his face dangerously close to Sasuke's. He was standing in the puddle of milk, breathing hard.
"Do I scare you or something?" Naruto could feel Sasuke's hot breath against his face. It sent shivers down his spine.
"A little." It hurt Naruto's pride to admit it, but based on his reaction, he really couldn't lie.
"Mm. And why's that?" Sasuke bent his head slightly, nibbling his way along Naruto's jaw-line before dipping down to his neck and sucking on his pulse.
Naruto inhaled sharply as his free hand grabbed Sasuke's shoulder, helping him stay standing. He could feel the other's tongue pushing against his skin, and his teeth biting harshly before letting up and sucking. Naruto's knees were shaking as the words "oh God" escaped his lips in a steady mantra.
Sasuke chuckled as he pulled away, licking the hickey he'd just made. "Forty."
"Wh-what?" Naruto asked before he moaned, Sasuke's free hand massaging his groin.
The milk and mop were forgotten on the floor as Sasuke pushed Naruto backwards, the raven also walking through the milk before holding the blond against the counter. He forced his knee between the blond's shaky legs to give him more access to what he was rubbing.
Naruto started panting, moaning, and shifting his hips in order to gain more friction. Sasuke chuckled.
"Why do you keep saying that?" Naruto panted.
Sasuke just smiled before leaning in and pressing his lips against Naruto's, forcing his tongue into the blond's mouth. Naruto, himself, moved the hand on Sasuke's shoulder into the raven's hair, pulling him closer as their tongues rolled over one another.
They continued kissing for a while before Sasuke pulled back, panting and grinning. "Seventy. Good enough."
He pulled away from Naruto and yanked him towards the door with the hand still holding his wrist. The blond stumbled, confused, the two of them leaving small footprints of milk behind them as they walked.
"G-good enough?" Naruto stuttered as Sasuke pulled him up the stairs. "For that?"
"To make you lean one-hundred percent towards men." Sasuke grinned over his shoulder as he opened his door. He practically threw Naruto onto the bed before closing his door and rubbing his hands together. "Shall we get started?"
Gaara, Neji, and Kiba spent the night with their pillows over their heads, trying in vain to block out the groans and cries of pleasure.
"What will the neighbours say?" Kiba sobbed into his pillow.
(1) I say this XD Well, I used to. It's been a while since I've had to. This is basically a roundabout way of saying to someone that they have a stick shoved up their ass. Get it? Lollipop?