Dear Chikan,

Honest questions my foot. You don't ask honest questions... or, rather, innocent ones. You knew I wouldn't answer, baka! Why take the time to ask??? Gah, whatever.

Mou, you are so mean to Orochi-kun. Even if it is true...

So how is little Anko-chan? You ARE watching out for her, right? Just for precaution... No need to be suspicious of our Orochi-kun. She's so small... and at that age, they're just too damned trusting.

I read your manga. The story is terrible, but the manga itself is brilliant. But, stop drawing me, you pervert!

So you were able to summon a frog- big whoop. Koshite-sensei has taught me the summoning jutsu as well, and I'm able to summon a giant slug! ... Okay, that didn't sound as cool as it really is, but, trust me, it's the best thing, and I'm so proud! And... Yes, I am proud of you as well, Jiraiya.

This coming week, Koshite-sensei and I are to go on a retrieval mission by orders of the daimyo; she says that we don't do seduction missions yet. Though I suppose you didn't need to have that information...

Things have been very slow around here. Apparently, Wave is much calmer than Konoha expected. Sad, really. I'm so bored... And that was NOT a suggestion for you to give me something to do. I don't need nor want to know.

Say hello to the others for me!

-Tsunade

P.S.- If Orochimaru is in still in pain after his little snake incident, please tell Sarutobi-sensei that he has my permission to use that potion I made back in that last winter when we were Genin. He knows where it is- just tell him to use the green one. Arigatou!

Tsunade bit the end of her pen distractedly. Things seemed to be much more entertaining over there than here, and she felt rather envious. Poor Orochimaru, though! She allowed herself a giggle. Ah, well. Those things happened, she supposed.

"Not often, though," she said, also allowing herself a Jiraiya moment. Then, it felt weird, and she stopped.

"Koshite-sensei!" she called, hopping out of her room. "Would you send this off while I pack?"

-+-+-+-+- Three Weeks, Two Days Later -+-+-+-+-

"Ha! He responded!" Tsunade laughed, lobbing her pack onto her bed, and settling herself on it as well. "Let's see what you're up to..."

--

Dear Mune-chan,

I am insulted, I've never asked a dishonest question in my life. Nor have I asked any less-than-perfectly-innocent questions either. I was thinking to get Koshite-chan some clothing for White Day, along with the package I usually send you. It was done with only the most generous of intentions.

Remember, I'm only as mean to Orochi-teme as he deserves. And I must say, if anything positive has come of you going to Wave, it's that my cost for headache medication has gone down drastically. And too damn trusting is definately a proper statement. She's dogging him like you were. And he's even paying attention to her! You should come back soon. Hey, I know all the genin groups were set up as three man cells, but Orochi-teme's got Anko all to himself... I don't know. I'm gonna send Gamakichi to check up on them, while I check out my team.

Oh yeah, about that, I don't even get to have a normal team, they've got me paired up with this kid to watch my team. His name's Arashi, and has he got a mouth. But damn if that kid ain't fast. Regardless, my team is Obito Uchia, Kakashi Hatake, and Rin. Yeah, it's weird, but she won't tell me her last name (from the way she's acting, I'll bet she wants it to be Hatake). But yeah, so the council won't even trust me to watch a bunch of brats by myself, it's humiliating! (picture of Jiraya pouting, with what appears to be Arashi pointing at him)

Horrible story! What's up with that? That's a prime-grade masterpiece! That's it! If you don't like my story, I'm gonna write until you do! Next month, I'm gonna give you a big, long, thick, sturdy, hard, painful chapter to read! How do you like that! (picture of Jiraya ranting. You know, chibi-rant face)

Slugs? Those acidic, limp, masses of flesh that eat flowers? Wow, at least snakes look menacing. I guess I'm lucky that my summons have arms. But slugs? What can they do, leave slippery slime trails? (picture of Tsunade pouting with Jiraya pointing at her)

A retrival mission, eh? If I remember, you were always the best at those. I hope to hear all the details when you get back. It should at least pass the time. Also, if I send in for a seduction mission, do I have to ask for you by name? I'd really like to know.

I told Professor-sensei about that bottle, but your ink was smeard and I thought it said green. But oh well, either way, Orochi-teme now is nearly unable to use his chakra. I don't know what you did to that stuff, but it was an ooooooold bottle, and mixing the blue and yellow ones together to get more probably wasn't the best idea. I guess it's too late to change that. Too bad. (picture of Jiraya laughing his ass off as Orochimaru is unable to use any jutsus except henge)

But besides that, nothing much going on here, though. But if you really don't want any suggestions for something to do, I guess I'll have to hold on to there pictures of Orochimaru washing his pants in the river. I was going to give them to you, but since you don't want my suggestion, I can always give them to Anko, or use them as blackmail.

Signed.

-the man whose genin team can crumble a villiage, he whose stealth is unmatched, the perfect photographer, The Jounin Sensei, Jiraya of Konoha.