Title: Shimmer in the darkness

It's been years' since Elliot's death. Years since I resigned from SVU, now Im in Connecticut. I changed my hair again, shorter now. Brought a nice house as well, no longer that small apartment, it's pretty big. Im not the richest of them all but im getting by–

Her thoughts were cut off by a boy's squeaky voice.

"Mommy come pway with me!"

Olivia turned around to see a little boy with shaggy brown hair. "Is that the way you ask?"

The little boy pondered for a moment, his nose wrinkled in thought. "Mommy can you pway wit me pwease?" He replied grinning a wide semi toothless grin.

Olivia smiled, closing her laptop. "Of course, what would you like to do Miklos."

"Bake cake."

"You want to bake a cake, for who?"

Miklos smile widen. "Somebody."

"It's a secret huh, ok then well I guess we can bake a cake. Say, can you go wash your hands and take out all the things we will need."

"Yes." He replied quickly heading in the kitchen.

"Wash them with soap Mickey." Olivia called out.

"YES MA'AM." Miklos called back.

Olivia smiled, picking up the phone and dialing a number. No answer. She hung up the phone and headed down stairs towards the kitchen.

"Ok are you ready?" Olivia asked.

"Yes ma'am." He replied. "Are we going to make chocolate cake?"

"Duh." Olivia said smiling, as she went in the refrigerator and took out the eggs.

They spent what could of took 45 minutes and extended it to an hour and a half. Leaving the two covered with frosting.

"Are you ever going to tell me who the cake is for?" Olivia asked a grinning Miklos.

"You!." He squealed. "For ya birthday."

Olivia gave a small laugh. "You remembered."

"Duh." He said laughing.

"I guess I'm getting old huh?"

"You're a pretty mom." He said smiling.

"Aw that's sweet." She said as she wrapped her arms around her son.

"Just like the fosting?"

"Sweeter than the frosting."

"Mom your hurting me." He said in gasps.

"Oh sorry Mickey." She responded letting him go.

"Mom can I eat cake now?"

"Why don't you wash up first."

"Mmm ok, don't eat any yet pwease."

"I'll try." Olivia responded, watching her son go upstairs.

10 minutes pass, within that time Miklos had forgotten about any cake and was dosing off. Olivia smiled taking him to his bedroom.

"Sweet dreams Miklos."

Olivia walked down stairs to the kitchen, figuring she would clean what was left from making the cake. She turned towards the door as she heard it open. There walked in a certain blonde rambling on her cell phone. Olivia shook her head, going back to her 'duty'.

She's always like that, every time she comes in she's on her phone. 'Taking care of business' that's what she says. It doesn't bother me much but I know Miklos would want to spend more time with her–

Arms around her broke her thoughts. She felt warm lips on her skin.

"Hey sexy, how you been?"

"Good." Olivia simply said.

"Can I make it better."

"You sure you have time for that?" Olivia asked pulling away from Alex.

"What's up with you?" Alex asked confused.

"When was the last time you actually spent time with me?"

"How about last night."

"Please Alex, you weren't there it was like your mind was far from me."

"I told you it was work, its stressing liv'."

"It's always work with you!" Olivia said, her voice full of hurt.

"Well im sorry liv' but Im not only supporting the two of us I have to support an extra weight!"

"How dare you bring our son into this?!" Olivia shouted.

"Not my son liv', your's you drag me into this–." She shouted back.

"What the hell is your problem, you've been bitching for the past week!"

"This is my problem, this whole situation–."

"Your situation, I gave up everything for you." Olivia replied walking in the living room.

"You're not the only one liv'!" She shouted, walking toward Olivia.

"So what now it's my fault!" She asked looking out the window.

"I didn't ask you to come here!"

Olivia turned towards Alex in disbelief. Was this the end? All of their hopes and dreams they shared and this was what it came down to.

"Are you two fighting?" Came a small voice behind them.

They both looked around, seeing Miklos with tears in his eyes.

"No honey, we are just having a disagreement." Olivia said, her voice calmer. "Go back to bed."

Miklos nodded going back up the steps.

"I can't believe your saying this Alex." Olivia started when she new Miklos was out of earshot.

"I just—." She stopped as she heard her cell phone rang.

Olivia rolled her eyes, walking back in the kitchen. She sighs before cutting a piece of chocolate cake and putting it in a small container. She wiped away the tears that zig-zag down her face, putting the container inside a blue and white lunch box, sliding it in the refrigerator. Olivia ran her fingers threw her hair, closing her eyes.

She felt Alex arms around her. "Look Liv im sorry ok, I know Im not myself lately."

"Its ok." Olivia simply said.

Alex gently turns Olivia around to face her. "Why don't we go upstairs liv'." She stated as she kissed the other.

Olivia pulled away avoiding Alex eyes. "Don't you have somewhere to go?"

"Work can wait."

Olivia shook her head. "No, it can't, just go–."

Alex ran her hands threw her blonde hair. "I don't get you liv, you say I don't spend time with you and yet when I try, you just push me away."

"I want you to want to spend time with me."

"I do."

"No, Alex you don't, I just want things to go back like they use to be." Olivia said getting a bottled water out of the refrigerator and opening it.

"I know you do, we all do—." She was yet again cut off by the tone of her cell phone.

"Just go Alex." Olivia said, with hurt in her voice.

"Im not leaving liv', I told you work can wait we still need to finish–."

"No, we don't, im done for tonight I just need sleep and you need to go back to work." Olivia replied as she began walking toward the steps that led to their bedroom.

"Liv'..." Alex began, but she was unable to find the right words.

"Just go, we will talk later ok." Olivia said before walking to Alex and giving her a gentle kiss.

Alex sighs, too tired to continue this feud., she simply said. "Ok."

Olivia gave a weak smile and began walking upstairs, hearing Alex getting her briefcase and leaving. Olivia ran her hands threw her own hair while walking into Miklos room.

Without warning she felt arms around her leg. She looked down seeing Miklos face filled with fear, tears covering his face.

"Oh Mickey What's wrong, tell mommy What's wrong." She said picking him up and setting him on his bed, as she kneeled in front of him. She wiped his face, taking his hand in her's.

"Honey tell me What's wrong."

Miklos sniffed, "You two were fighting."

"Oh Mickey im so sorry you had to hear that."

"You two were fighting because of me, its my fault!" Miklos responded looking away.

"No, its not your fault, we were just disagreeing on something that's all. Miklos we both love you, its just that sometimes grown ups have these disagreements." Olivia's eyes met Miklos. "Do you understand."

In between sniffs and small hiccups he nodded.

Olivia smiled, although her heart was breaking as she still saw the fear in her son's eyes. She embraced him in a hug.

"You know we both love you Mickey, you know that right?"

"I know you love me."

Olivia felt tears coming down. "We both love you ok."

"If you say so."

"No, I know so, Mickey Alex loves you, you are her son as well." She said hugging him again, this time when they broke bonds Miklos smiled.

"Thanks mom."

"Remember that ok."

He nodded. "Tell Lexxi I said goodnight pwease." Miklos said getting up and yawning.

Olivia smiled at so quickly he bounced back to his normal self. "Of course, goodnight honey."

"Goodnight mom." He ran over to Olivia and hugged her.

Olivia smiled, "Come on ill read ya a story."

"What kind?"


Olivia went back nearly five years ago, going back to the night her world changed...