Take French Conversation, they'd said. You'll have fun, they'd told her. We'll all be in the same class, they'd pointed out, and we can hang out together, they'd added. So she'd caved in and signed up. What a grand mistake that had been. Haruhi slammed her book shut and let her head fall forward on the table with a thump and muffled growl of frustration.
"Is something wrong?" a quiet voice inquired. Haruhi looked up– and up– to see Mori looking down at her with a concerned expression.
"Oh, nothing, it's just…" she sat up with an aggravated sigh and stared at the door of the third music room. "Well, Hikaru and Kaoru told me to sign up for French Conversation this semester so we could all have a class together." Mori tilted his head at her, as if to ask why that was a problem. "It's just that now they keep sneaking French phrases into conversations just to test me, and most of the time they're either so obscure they're not in the book or…well, obscene…" she sighed again and sunk deeper into the sofa in defeat.
Mori raised his eyebrows at this, but didn't comment. Honey, who was mostly asleep on his back, muttered something into Mori's ear before snuggling closer.
"Tamaki," Mori translated, nodding toward the blonde.
"Ah, right!" Haruhi said, snapping her fingers. "Thanks, Mori-senpai!"
She got up and went over to the table where Tamaki and Kyouya were talking. "Excuse me, Tamaki-senpai? I have a question."
Tamaki looked up at her and donned his most dazzling smile. "Ask me anything, my angel," he exclaimed, standing politely.
"Well, it's for my French class." She took a step back, as Tamaki was a little too close for comfort (and breathing room). "I just need to know what a phrase means."
"I would be honored to lend my assistance!" Tamaki announced, bowing low (and pointedly ignoring the amused scoff from Kyouya.) "What is it?"
Haruhi shifted awkwardly; she was out of her element, asking questions. And besides, knowing the twins…but this might be the only way, short of asking Kyouya to look it up for her, and he charged exorbitant amounts for doing so.
"Ménage à trois," she told him.
The color promptly drained from Tamaki's face. Across the table, Haruhi noticed the way Kyouya discreetly adjusted his glasses in order to cover his mouth. "Why ever would you need to know such a thing, Haruhi?" the blonde inquired, voice polite as could be but with an obvious quaver.
"Well, I was talking to the twins," Haruhi began warily, noting the way this provoked a choked cough from Kyouya, "and Hikaru mentioned that we should have one the next time they come over to my house. Is it some kind of food? It wasn't in my study book– Senpai? Where are you going?"
Tamaki was stomping, about as angrily and melodramatically as it was possible for one to stomp, over to the corner where the twins were lurking (and snickering). He was about ten feet away and rolling up his sleeves when they finally jumped up and ran for the door. Tamaki tore after them like a man after his daughter's delinquent boyfriend, which in a sense was true enough.
"The offer stands, Haruhi!" Kaoru called back cheerfully as Hikaru yanked open the door, and then both twins were out and running down the hall, cackling madly and with an enraged Tamaki at their heels.
"What on earth was that all about?" Haruhi asked, turning first to Mori and Honey (both of whom looked an interesting cross between horrified and bemused) and then to Kyouya (who was valiantly disguising his laughter in the crook of his arm).
It wasn't until several hours later and an impromptu study session with Renge that Haruhi learned the unfortunate truth and hoped that Tamaki had not murdered either or both of the twins. In all honesty, this hope only partly resulted from her desire to kill them herself.