Summary: My Seer powers are growing, I can tell. I've been learning from bitter experience what can happen if you're not careful. I have Seen far more than I wanted ...

Rating: T, subject to change

Warnings: Major Character Death, Other Sensitive Topic

Disclaimer: I don't own Lily, any of the Marauders, or Snape.

Author's Notes: Although this fic can be read on its own, it's a companion to the Chameleon series, the contents of Lily's diary (the one Albus gives Harry).

Lily's Secret

By Alexannah

Entry One

Dear Diary,

That seems a bit of an odd way to start. Even if this is going to be a diary. I guess I'm just not used to writing like this. I never used to write much outside schoolwork. Then over the holidays Petunia was set the task of writing a diary by her English teacher and I suppose the idea grew on me.

Not that I have any idea what to say. Maybe I should just write what I did today. That's what everyone else seems to do.

Right: what I did today.

Started off as normal. Breakfast in the Great Hall, then Transfiguration. Professor McGonagall seemed to be in a funny mood this morning. Come to think of it, so did Professor Dumbledore at breakfast. Hmm …

The lesson was hard (even for me). We have piles of homework. It's only the fourth day of term, but (as every teacher reminds us daily) we are now in our OWL year. James Potter and his band of jokers seem to be the only ones who haven't started today's. Minus Remus, of course. He's so unlike them I keep forgetting he's one of them. Honestly, he could do much better. I have tried to befriend him but those stupid 'friends' of his got in the way. It's all the Marauders or none of them, and in the end it turned out to be none.

Um, anyway. I seem to be getting off-track here. After Transfiguration was Charms. I love that subject. The lesson was normal, I suppose. Potter let off five Dungbombs in the classroom and has detention this weekend. I was sorely tempted to gloat when he realised the teachers would give out detentions in the first week, but I resisted. It was hard, though.

Maybe I should just skip the rest. It was an ordinary day, really. Hm. I don't know how I'm going to keep this up if I only write down the things that don't usually happen -

I am stupid.

The whole reason I began this diary was because of something that happened the day before yesterday, and when I started writing I got so caught up in today's events (or lack thereof) I forgot why I'd decided to start it in the first place.

Maybe I should start at the beginning. Over the summer I had a few funny dreams. The first was pretty vague and I couldn't remember anything when I woke up, but it felt so different to my normal dreams. After a couple of days I forgot about it.

Then two weeks later I had another dream. It felt like the first, but this time I could remember it. Petunia was getting married, but I didn't recognise the groom. She looked a lot older as well. Mum and Dad were missing from the reception. So was I.

My third dream came merely two nights afterwards. It wasn't long – there was a long period of blackness and tension; I knew something was going to happen. Then a voice I didn't know cried a spell I didn't know and a bright flash of green light appeared as I woke shaking.

I looked up the spell. I hunted for hours in every magic book I owned (and that's a lot). I was trying to find one that had green light and sounded like "Abra Kadabra" but wasn't. Eventually I found it: Avada Kedavra. The Killing Curse.

Of course I'd heard of the Killing Curse, it's hard not to with Lord Whatsit around, but I hadn't actually heard it called by its proper name.

I tried to kid myself that I must have heard it called that before and just forgotten and it came out in a nightmare, but I wasn't convinced and I was shaken.

Then, three days before the start of term, something weird happened. Not a dream this time.

We were sitting playing cards in the living-room as a family. Muggle cards, of course. Petunia's jealousy of me stretches as far as to refuse to be in a room with a magical object. (Sometimes I seem to be an exception to the rule, but only sometimes. Sisters.) Anyway, Petunia was winning and I was losing desperately.

It was my turn and I was trying to choose which card to lay, but as Petunia was next after me I didn't want to give her an advantage. I wished suddenly that I knew what cards she had and before I knew it, an image of a hand of cards appeared in my vision.

I think I lost it for a few seconds, but my head stopped spinning and the cards vanished from my vision, but I could still remember what they were. Deciding I didn't have anything to lose, I pretended the cards I'd seen were Petunia's and chose my card to put down.

Guess what? The cards were hers.

I said I needed a drink and headed for the kitchen as my parents packed the cards away, marvelling over my luck. (Petunia had stomped upstairs in a sulk.)

Of course I've heard of Seers – I am taking Divination – but I always thought they only came from pureblood families. I know there are Muggles who claim to See stuff, but to be honest I think that's all fraud and trickery.

I'm confused. What I saw then and possibly in the dreams as well is definitely not normal. Maybe I should talk to my Divination teacher … Yes, I will.

Wow, this diary is helping. I have to think through everything logically to be able to write it down. Maybe I will keep it up.