This is the first of hopefully many one-shots based on funny things that happen 2 me in my buddies in P.E. class staring the Twilight cast. We all worked really hard on it so I hope you like it.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters or Twilight.
My name is Isabella Marie Cullen. Yep that's right Cullen. It's been three years since Edward and I got married and the whole gang decided to move to our new home. We were all posing as teenagers at our new high school, and we always looked forward to one thing everyday, P.E. class.
Believe it or not it just so happens that all six of us had gotten put in this class together, right after lunch (which we didn't need). Can you imagine how hard it must have been for all those humans to spend an hour every day being outdone by six extremely graceful vampires (Ok five. Vampire or not I'm still clumsy).
Today didn't start very different than any other day. At exactly 6:30 our alarm clock went off, warning us that we had half and hour before school started. I hated that alarm clock with a passion. Edward had bought us the damn thing after we had been late to school three times because we had been, well…busy. I reached over and grabbed the stupid thing and was about to chuck it at the wall (While still lip locked with Edward mind you), but he caught me.
"Bella dear, I would love to call in sick, and stay here with you all day…"
"Then why don't you," I asked, pouting.
"Because we need to go to school."
"Five more minutes," I said, pulling him back down for another kiss. He welcomed it, and kissed me back until we heard a loud knock on the door.
"Edward we're going to be late again," Emmett yelled, "get off Bella, and the two of you put some clothes on in the next five minutes or I'll come in there and get you. I'm not kidding!" I growled in protest, but got up.
"We will continue this later," I said.
"I have no problem with that," Edward said, smiling his crooked smile and growling playfully, then jumping at me, and throwing me onto the bed. After about ten more minutes, and another threat from Emmett, we finally made it out of our room and out to the car.
School started just like it normally did. We got there just in time thanks to my husband's insane driving. As a vampire I got accustomed to driving fast, but he was just reckless (His eyes were constantly on me instead of the road). We went off to class, English for me and Edward, and followed the rest of the day like normal, until lunch.
We walked into the lunchroom expecting Alice and Jasper to be there waiting but there was no Alice.
"Hey Jasper. Where's Alice?" I asked.
"She meet this girl, Michelle, in her math class, she said she's going to sit with her today to help her with some project."
"Oh," that was weird. I'd never heard of this Michelle. She sounded like trouble.
We sat quietly at lunch. It was strangely silent without Alice's constant chatter, but I wasn't complaining. Edward spent the extra quiet time nuzzling my neck and lightly kissing me, until the bell rang.
I was making my way to the locker room when someone quickly came up behind me and flung its arms around me. It was Alice.
"Run by hugging," she yelled, then ran up to Rosalie and did the same thing, before running into the locker room.
"What was that all about?" I asked Rosalie.
"I haven't the slightest," she said.
We went into the locker room to find Alice sitting on the bench, nearly bouncing off the walls. I walked to my locker and began to dress out. I turned to speak to her but she wasn't there. I turned back to my locker and let out a small scream. There she was, about a centimeter away from my face, staring at me intently with her big caramel eyes.
"What kind of underwear dose Edward wear?" she asked.
"What?" I just stared at her. Did she just ask me what I thought she did?
"I said what kind of underwear dose Edward wear?" she said slowly, "Jasper wears froggy boxers, until I take them off," she said I smile spreading across he face.
"Oh! TMI Alice. TMI!!!!!!!!" I screamed, "Are you HIGH? What have you been smoking?"
"Silly Bella! Vampires don't get high! All I did was have some lemonade with Michelle," she said then skipped off to class. There was something very wrong with her.
I walked out of the locker room and went to stand for roll call. It was only a minute before two strong, cold arms wrapped around my waste.
"Hey baby," Edward said, leaning down to kiss behind my ear.
"Hi," I said, not sounding very happy. Alice's behavior was really getting to me. I had to know what was going on with her.
"What's wrong," he asked me.
"It's Alice. Have you noticed that she's been acting really weird since lunch?"
"Weird? How so?"
"She asked me what kind of underwear you wear."
"Ok that is weird."
"Just a little."
"Okay everyone come on in, huddle up," said our coach, Mr. Rice, "today you're gonna run going to run two laps and then play basketball in the gym."
Edward and I started to walk out to the track and suddenly Emmett, Rosalie and Jasper came up beside us.
"Hey do you guys know what's wrong with Alice?" Jasper asked.
"You noticed too?" I asked.
"Of course I did. She's my wife. Don't you think I'd notice if something was extremely wrong with her?" Just as he was saying this Alice came up behind him, grabbed his hand, and pulled him around to meet her. She pulled him down so their lips were almost touching.
"Spicket!" she screamed just as he was about to kiss her. Then turned, and pulled him away. "Come on Jazz lets go find a closet."
"This isn't good. What the hell is wrong with her?" Rosalie asked.
"I don't know. She's acting like she's high," I said.
"We can't get high Bella," Edward said, "nothing effects us like that, except…"
"Except what?" I asked.
"…Lemonade." I couldn't help it, I just started laughing.
"Lemonade? Are you serious?" he looked serious, but it sounded so funny.
"It's not funny Bella. It's actually really serious. Did she mention anything about it?"
" Well actually she did. She said she had some at lunch. Why? What's the big deal?"
"Bella the acid from the lemons mixes with the venom in our bodies and makes us high. We can't think straight. Alice could do something stupid and reveal our secret without even realizing it. If we were at home it wouldn't be a big deal, but here, it could be a major problem." Who knew lemonade could be so dangerous.
Just then Alice ran up to us, Jasper in tow, his hair messy, his shirt askew, and missing his belt. She ran straight into Emmett, nearly knocking him down. Luckily Edward caught her before she could fall and leave a dent in the concrete.
"Emmett have I ever told you how strangely attractive you are?" she said. Rosalie's eyes turned deep black, Emmett just laughed.
"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU ALICE!!!!!!!!!!!! HOW DARE YOU MAKE A MOVE ON MY HUSBAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"Rose leave it she can't help it," Emmett said, still laughing.
"I really think we should take her home before she does something else stupid." I said.
"Your right," Edward said, "You Rose and Jasper take her home in the convertible, Emmett and I will distract coach so you guys can sneak out and meet you back at the house." He gave me a small kiss and a crooked little smile then he and Emmett were off to do their evil deed.
"Senior Arroz!" Emmett yelled waving his arms in the air.
"Emmett I thought I told you to stop translating my name into other languages. I'm Mr. Rice and that's final."
"Lo siento senior," Emmett said. I couldn't help laughing.
"What do you want Emmett?" Coach asked.
"Well first I'd like to tell you a little story," At this statement Coach Rice put his head in his hands. Edward gave us the signal to go as Emmett went on about some girl named Alyssa who married a spoon. We hurried out of the room, dragging Alice to the convertible.
When we were almost to the house Shake Your Money Maker came on the radio and Alice took this as an invitation to stand up in the car and dance.
"Seat belt check!" Rosalie yelled, ramming her foot down on the break and sending Alice flying through the air. "That's for hitting on my husband!"
"I can fly," she yelled. Then she saw the tree, "No I can't". She hit it with such force it knocked it over. Jasper ran to pick her up and we all ran into the house. Carlisle looked her over and determined that she would be all right in a few hours. When Emmett and Edward got home we decided it would be best if we all sat quietly and watched a movie. It had been one of the craziest days I had ever spent with the Cullens and I was glad it was finally over.
Or so I thought.
2 hours later Alice's POV
I got up from the couch quietly. Edward and Bella were supposed to be "keeping an eye on me" while everyone else was out hunting, but they were to busy auguring. We were watching Van Helsing, and Edward insisted on making it as hard as hell for us to enjoy because he hated fake vampire movies.
"Remind me again why we are watching this movie," Edward said.
"Because Hugh Jackman is hot!"
" How can you say that while I'm sitting right here next to you? Did you forget me completely? Hi I'm Edward Cullen I'm your HUSBAND! "
"He's still hot, and I love him in this movie."
"How can you say that? He's a warewolf!"
" Ha. Van Helsing is nicer to me."
"That's not funny Bella."
"Oh come on. Stop being such a baby. You know you're the only mythical creature I could ever and will ever love."
That's when they decided to start making out. Now was my chance. While they were busy eating each other's faces, I made my escape.
I snuck as quietly as possible out off the room. I ran into the back yard and climbed into the window of my top-secret door less room. I ran to my dresser, pulled it from the wall revealing my safe. I put in the code and opened it revealing what treasures were inside. There was my beauty. My darling. My precious.
A six pack of lemonade.
Lesson: do not under any circumstances give vampires lemonade!!!!!!!
So how'd yall like it? If you did, press that lil button and review. Tell me if you think I should add some more one shots like this one. Believe me there are many more fun P.E. stories where this one came from. Thanks you so much.