My Valentine by Trekfan

Disclaimer: It's not mine, though I wish I could be as creative as Annie Proulx. I am only borrowing her wonderful characters so I can FIX what I couldn't stand.

rating: NC-17, with BBM fic it's safer.

Somewhere out there

Beneath the pale moonlight

Someone's thinking of me

And loving me tonight

Somewhere out there

Someone's saying a prayer

That we'll find one another

In that big somewhere out there

And even though I know how every far apart we are

It helps to think we might be wishing on the same bright star

And when the night wind starts to sing a lonesome lullaby

It helps to think we're sleeping underneath the same big sky

Somewhere out there

If love can see us through

Then we'll be together

Somewhere out there

Out where dreams come true

Somewhere out there by James Ingram

Ennis made the drive into town to pick up his mail about every two or three days. It had been a few months since he'd heard from Jack. They'd finally gotten together after his divorce and he still felt bad for letting him leave. He tried to make up for it by borrowing Don Wroe's cabin as a peace offering. Jack seemed pleased by that, but Ennis could tell he was still upset about their arrangements. He'd tried to tell him that two guys ranching up together wouldn't work. That it was too risky, but he could see the hope shining in those blue eyes of his. Their good-byes had been the same dreaded moment, a kiss neither wanted to end followed by a hug they reluctantly released. It always tore their hearts and as he drove away from Jack he felt his gut twist just like it did that first time when they left Brokeback.

He was feeling some apprehension when he noticed there wasn't a postcard among his pile of mail. He threw the collection of bills and catalogs onto the passenger seat and drove back to his small house. He opened the door, turned on the lamp in the living room and deposited his mail onto the small kitchen table, deciding he'd look at them later. He went to the refrigerator and took out a bottle of beer and sat in an old worn recliner that he'd found at a church rummage sale, which was where he came by most of his furniture.

He looked around this old house, the roof leaked, the heat didn't always work the way it should and it was drafty. But it was a roof over his head and it was a fringe benefit for working at Stoutamire's ranch. However this arrangement was soon to change, he'd just gotten word that Mr. Stoutamire had sold the ranch to some developers and not only was Ennis losing his job but his home as well. It was a good thing he'd seen an ad for a used trailer some fella was selling. It was located at a trailer park just a few miles outside of downtown Riverton. That was one of his errands he did on his one day off, find a new home for himself. He'd given the guy a down payment and was going to give him the rest when he got his next paycheck. This guy had a job waiting for him in California so he was in a hurry to move that was why he was selling him the trailer dirt-cheap. He still had child support for his girls so he couldn't be choosy about where he was going to live.

His next order of business was to find a job. Stoutamire said he would give him a good reference seeing as how he was his best worker and only had good things to say about him.

He got up to make something for supper even though he really was in no mood to eat, but he remembered how Junior had commented on how thin he was the last time she and Jenny visited so he promised to take better care of himself.

It was hard at a time like this to keep his spirits up, between losing his job and home all in one shot and then not hearing from Jack he was pretty down in the dumps. He made a light meal and then slid into bed.

Morning came quickly and Ennis got into his usual routine took piss, showered and made coffee and breakfast. In only a few more days he'd have to pack up and move into his new home. He hadn't gotten any attachment to this ranch, it was only a roof over his head. But he would miss living in a house, the trailer was a lot smaller than this place. More importantly he'd miss working at Stoutamire and having money in his pocket. Stoutamire said he was going to give him a generous severance pay because he liked Ennis and knew he was a hard worker. He already put out feelers at the feed store for work.

Ennis tried to keep his mind off his troubles for a few minutes by going through the mail. 'Bills, bills, junk mail, bills...what the?" he scratched his head when he came to a letter that had a postmark on it from Childress Texas. The address was written in Jack's chicken scratch. 'Jack never writes letters, we only pass postcards between us. What is that dumbass rodeo cowboy up to now?' he thought as he absently caressed the handwriting with his thumb.

He tore open the letter and had to squint to make out the missive.


I know it's been a while since our last fishing trip, but I've been doing a lot of thinking. Sometimes I miss you so much I can hardly stand it, so I wanna get together with you on the fourteen of next month. Write me back and say if ya can. You got us a place last time so it's my turn to get us a roof over our heads. We'll be meetin in Casper at this address 123 West E St.

I really hope you can join me cowboy.

Yours Jack.

Ennis was excited like he always was when he heard from Jack. But he was curious as to why he wanted to meet him in Casper. They always met out in the middle of no where. Casper was a city. Maybe Jack was going up to see his folks and wanted to see him before he had to go back to Texas and Casper was on the way back. He'd only been to Casper a few times, once for Jenny when she was having problems with her asthma and the docs in Riverton recommended some treatment she could only get in Casper. Then again when one of the foremen at a ranch he was working for needed him to come along to pick up some equipment.

Ennis didn't think on it too much, there was nothing that got him out of his funk than hearing from Jack or even better knowing they were getting together. He quickly finished getting ready for work but before he left he took out a postcard from small desk in the living room and wrote.


Ennis Del Mar

Addressed it and he would mail it during his lunch hour.

Jack felt like he was sitting on pins and needles every day the mailman came. 'Would Ennis see his letter, would he write back.'

He's already made his arrangements for his surprise for Ennis. He knew that Ennis would never agree to go away with him for Valentine's day so he didn't tell him any details. He just told Lureen that he had to go see his folks for a week. She was not happy he would be gone for Valentine's day but with the way their marriage was these days, if you could call it a marriage, what difference did it make if he were here or not.

He was pulled out of his anxious reverie when he heard the mail truck pull up, he didn't even give the guy a chance to come up the walk he met him halfway.

"So Mark, anything for me?" he stood in front of the postal worker, moving around like he had ants in his pants.

"Hi Mr. Twist, well now let's see." He looked at the bundle of letters and catalogs and checked the address and then handed the appropriate pile to Jack. "Here ya go. You have a nice day."

"You too Mark," he said absently. He went back inside the house and began flipping through each letter. Then he saw something fall out and lo and behold it was a postcard from Wyoming. He quickly picked it up and smiled and jumped up and down. Kissed the postcard. "Woo WEE!!!!!!" he danced around the living room. Good thing he was alone or Lureen would surely call the guys with the straitjacket for him.

Jack drove into town to pick up some things for Valentine's day. He felt like he was flying as he pulled out of the driveway and headed North to Casper.

He got to his destination before Ennis and got inside and made some special changes to their surroundings.

Ennis had to stop for gas just outside of Casper and got directions on how to find E Street. As he drove up the block looking at addresses he stopped the car when he saw what stood at the 123 address. It was the Parkway Plaza Hotel and Convention center. must have the wrong address.' He thought, then he drove into the lobby and went inside and asked at the front desk if he'd gotten the right address.

"Yes sir you this is 123 West E Street."

Ennis thought this had to be some kind of mistake, the only time he and Jack spent time in a motel was the Siesta and that place was a shit hole. But he was a stranger in Casper so he decided 'what the hell.'

"Um you wouldn't happen to have a Jack Twist registered here?"

"Hold on a moment, please and I will check." The woman at the desk went through the guest registration book and then said "Oh yes there is a Mr. Jack Twist listed, he's in room B 63." She directed him how to get there.

Ennis went to park his truck then went back inside the hotel and found the room. He stood outside the door, hesitant to knock. 'What if this is some kind of joke? What if this is a different Jack Twist.' But Ennis knew there was only one Jack Twist in this world only one that lived in his heart and well 'hell he'd already left his comfort zone the minute he left his truck and came into the lobby. Might as well see what kind of trouble that dumbass cooked up for them.'

He took gritted his teeth and knocked on the door. Didn't take long for it to open and his breath got knocked out of him. Jack was standing there dressed in a dark blue shirt and jeans they both looked new. His heart was racing and his eyes unconsciously ran up and down Jack's torso.

"So are you going to come in or decorate the hallway, cowboy?" Jack turned around and walked back into the room and Ennis followed like a bee to honey.

"Jack what is this all about?"

"I think this is called a hotel room, and if I gotta explain why we're here you better show me some ID cause you're NOT Ennis Del Mar."

"I mean how could you afford a fancy place like this?"

"Well sales were pretty good lately and I received an incredible commission and I couldn't think of a better way to spend it than on US. I wanted to do something special. Especially today."

"Today? What is so special about today?"

"Oh Ennis, okay I know you don't wear a watch but I thought at least you looked at a calendar every once in a while." Jack went over to the desk against the wall and showed him a hotel calendar and pointed to today's date. February 14th.

Ennis' eyes widened and then he looked into Jack's eyes. Jack came over to him and locked lips with him. Jack's lips parted briefly from Ennis' and he whispered softly "Happy Valentine's day cowboy." Then resumed his kisses, wrapping his arms around Ennis' neck. He felt Ennis' arms wrap around his back.

"Mmm, Jack." Ennis began unbuttoning Jack's shirt and Jack mirrored his actions. Ennis kissed his lips, his hands framing Jack's face, then he licked his way down his neck. He nibbled the taut skin on the exposed throat leaving marks. He pulled the shirt aside till the nipples showed and he bent and licked each one and blew on them.

"Ennis," he hissed feeling his cock spring into action. He felt Ennis' hands resting on his hips, thumbs rubbing around his belly button. Ennis kissed the center of his chest then slowly sank to his knees in front of Jack. He wrapped his arms around his hips, hands squeezing his denim encased ass cheeks and pulled him closer. Lips kissing and licking navel, fingers unbuttoned his jeans.

Jack's hands combing Ennis' dark blond curls as his shirt fell on the floor. Ennis opened the zipper and pulled Jack's pants down off his hips and he helped him step out of them and threw them aside to join the shirt. Then he looked back at Jack's groin.

"What the...?!" he stared at Jack's groin then up at Jack, who flashed his pearly whites at him.

Jack was wearing a red G-string that accentuated his cock and the words 'BE MINE' written in black across the front. "Like it? I wanted this day to be special and full of surprises."

Ennis chuckled, shook his head, "Jack Fuckin Twist." He took hold of Jack's cock and kissed the cotton-covered tip, Jack's fingers tightened in his hair.

"C'mere," he took Jack by the hand and they walked to the bed. Ennis took off the G-String and kissed Jack, his tongue seeking entrance and was granted access. Their eyes met and Ennis picked Jack up in his arms and gently deposited him on the bed. Jack smiled up at him and captured Ennis' lips.

"Close your eyes, Ennis." Ennis hesitated for a moment as he sat back on his knees then closed his eyes. "Open your mouth." Ennis did, he felt Jack feed him something, he chewed then he recognized what Jack gave him.

"I know how much you like peanuts." He had a canister of Mr. Peanut honey roasted nuts that he knew were Ennis' favorite.

Jack smiled and fed more nuts to Ennis and kissed him. He stole a nut out of Ennis' mouth. He ran his fingers through Ennis' hair, cupped his cheeks, and kissed his lips. He ran his hands down the side of Ennis' neck then to his shoulder and he pulled his shirt off his shoulders and threw it onto the growing pile on the floor.

He pushed Ennis back onto his butt and unzipped his pants and pulled them off and onto the floor. He scooted up between his legs and reclaimed Ennis' lips. "I want you cowboy." He cupped his cock. "Do you want me?" he kissed him again, rolled his balls in the palm of his hand.

"Yeah want ya real bad, rodeo."

Jack pulled his foreskin back "real nice," the head poked out of it's hiding spot and Jack licked the slit. He was rewarded with a pearly drop, which he licked at eagerly. He stuck his tongue out and flicked the tip out and swirled around the head and Ennis watched his cock slowly disappear into Jack's mouth.

"Oh gawd!" he threw his head back and thrust helplessly into Jack's mouth. Jack released him just before he was going to cum. And Ennis took the lead and flipped him over. Jack handed Ennis some oil and Ennis coated his fingers and poked his finger into Jack's tight opening, loosening him up. Then he coated his own cock.

"Ya want me to ride ya rodeo, huh?"

"Oh yeah, Ennis ride me. Ride me hard cowboy." Ennis pulled his fingers out and just as the head of his cock touched Jack's hole Jack turned over onto his back so they were face to face.

"Jack?" they'd never done this before and it made Ennis nervous.

Jack took Ennis in hand again to get his motor running. "Come on cowboy I want to watch you mount up. Wanna see your face."

Ennis was too far-gone to back out now, not that he'd ever do that.

Jack pulled his legs up and exposed himself, his opening spasm in anticipation, like an invitation that Ennis immediately accepted and they both watched as the tip of his cock slowly slid into Jack.

"Oh yeah, keep it comin." Inch by inch the thick cock pushed in and Jack's channel expanded and contracted to accommodate this welcome invader.

"Yer ready Jack?" Ennis' heart skipped a beat when their eyes met and he saw the wanton passion in those heavenly blue eyes.

"Oh yeah, cowboy, let er rip."

Ennis began to thrust. Jack wrapped his legs around his hips.

"Faster, oh please go faster." Ennis had his hands on Jack's chest he pistoned his hips faster. The pressure building in his balls, sweat ran off his chin and onto Jack's neck and chest.

The new position face to face made their lovemaking more intense.

Jack's eyes met Ennis' again and his hips met Ennis' hard thrusts. He grabbed his cock and stroked, running his thumb across the head.

His breath hissed when Ennis' hand joined his, two thumbs rolling across the tip of his cock.

"Uh," Jack threw his head back, "Ennis, oh this. I'm gonna, gonna."

"Cum lil darlin." And Jack did, squirting pearly white stream over his hands and his stomach.

His anal muscles contracted and Ennis growled, captured his lips, thrust his tongue into Jack's mouth and shot his load into Jack.

They stayed coupled up, Ennis lying on top of him. Jack felt Ennis' cock slowly pull out. They rolled over, their bodies still tangled together. Ennis was kissing his cheek, he heard his heavy breathing in his ear. Then he heard it, not more than a sound in a puff of air brushing his ear. "I love you."

More kisses followed, chin, Jack's nose, eyes meeting.

"Me too, cowboy." Jack whispered back. Jack covered them with the thick comforter and they fell asleep in each other's arms.

Jack slowly opened his eyes, he could see the early morning light coming in through the opening in the drapes. He looked to his left and was dismayed by the empty space greeting him. He looked again and saw something sitting on the pillow. He turned on the lamp on the nightstand and picked up the object. It was a small carving of a cowboy on a horse. Back on Brokeback Ennis would past the time at camp doing carvings. Jack was always amazed at the workmanship. His heart was filled with so much joy at this gift from Ennis. His way of letting Jack keep him close when they were not together. 'But where is that cowboy?' he looked around and spotted his hat sitting on the couch. He got out of bed, went to the bathroom then came out and put his clothes on. He found Ennis outside smoking a cigarette.

"Can I join you?" he asked. Ennis turned around and smiled at him.

"Mornin," he offered Jack a cigarette and lit it for him.

"Thanks for the carving, it's real nice."

Ennis nodded at him and focussed his gaze on the mountain.

"How about I order us some room service?"

"Jack," he was worried about being spotted together.

Jack picked up on it. "Don't worry I'll tell them to leave it outside the door." He went back inside and ordered up something special.

A short while later they heard a knock on the door and he wheeled in the cart. Ennis joined him and Jack pulled open the covers. Revealing eggs, bacon, sausage and coffee. And some strawberries and bananas.

They sat at a table near the window and ate. "Good?" Jack asked.

"Yep, love it."

"Stay here," he kissed Ennis then went into the bathroom. Jack had another surprise for him. He came back and put his hands on Ennis' shoulders.

"C'mere I got something to show you." Jack took his hand and led him into the bathroom. Ennis' mouth dropped when he saw Jack had filled the hot tub with water, there were several tea candles lit around the room. Jack took his clothes off and got into the tub. He had brought the strawberries and a banana with him and some champagne.

"Come on cowboy the water is fine."

Ennis undressed and joined Jack. The tub sat next to a big window that faced the mountains, they sat side by side. Their bodies touching. Jack leaned back and took a strawberry and bit off the end and fed the read to Ennis. He poured some champagne and offered some to Ennis. "I know we usually drink whiskey or beer but I figured this was a special occasion."

They clinked the fluted glasses and drank up. Ennis grabbed a strawberry and bit off the end and rubbed it on Jack's lips, then leaned forward and licked off the juices off his lips. He popped the strawberry into his mouth and then kissed Jack and his tongue went inside and stole the strawberry back. "Hey!" Jack giggled when their lips part. Ennis chewed on the berry and smiled, "you stole my nut." Jack laughed at the unintentional joke and for emphasis he put his hand on Ennis' warm sac. "No they sure feel like they're still there." He moved over to sit on Ennis' lap and grabbed Ennis' hair and they did some major lip locking.

Ennis grabbed a banana and peeled it. Then he looked at their cocks then smiled up at Jack as he put the banana next to Jack's lips. Jack parted his lips and started to lick and suck on it like it was a cock. Ennis had one end in his mouth and Jack took the other and they were biting the banana until their lips met and they kissed.

"Now I want the real thing," Ennis said as he reached between them and brought their cocks together and started stroking them. Jack decided to do some exploring of his own and he put some liquid soap on his right hand and skirted down Ennis' back, rubbed downwards until he was at his cleft between his cheeks. Then his finger found his hole and while Ennis was rubbing their cocks Jack stuck his finger into Ennis' clenched entrance.

"Oh shit, Jack!" he yelled out. They set a rhythm, they were both huffing and puffing and both guns went off. Ennis leaned his head on Jack's shoulder and bit down hard, leaving his mark.

Jack got off Ennis and sat beside him again. They rested for a few minutes then got out of the tub. They put on matching robes that had Jack had placed on a warmer. They went back into the main room and sat on the couch.

"What's wrong cowboy?" Jack could tell something was on Ennis' mind.

"I don't wanna spoil this special day for us, Jack."

"You know you can tell me anything, now what's bothering you?"

Ennis told him about losing his job and his home and moving into a trailer. Stoutamire gave him a very generous severance that would keep him going and help pay the child support but he needed to get work soon.

"Don't worry I'm sure you'll get a job, you're a good worker." Jack patted his back and then leaned his head on Ennis' shoulder. "Thanks again for this." He picked up the carving he's left on the end table near the couch. "No matter where I am you'll be with me."

"I wish it could be different rodeo, you know I do." They never did talk much about ranching up together. Not since Ennis had told him about Earl and Rich. And Jack didn't want to pressure him.

They spent a few days together before Jack had to head back to Texas and Ennis had to go back to Riverton.

Ennis arrived back at his trailer in the late afternoon. He noticed a note on the door. Someone named William Thomas at Walden Farms wanted him to contact him right away and he left him his address and phone number. Since Ennis hadn't gotten a phone yet he decided to pay the man a visit.

"Mr. Thomas?" Ennis had stuck his head into the office of the farm.

"Yes, I'm William Thomas,"

"I'm Ennis Del Mar, you left a note on my door."

"Oh yes please come in. I hear that you need a job, and I happen to need a new foreman. My current foreman, Hank, is retiring and I need someone with plenty of ranch experience." He told Ennis how much pay he was going to get and Ennis almost fell on the floor. It was double what he was making at Stoutamire. The job also came with medical benefits, which was a rare thing. And if things worked out he would also get paid vacation after six months.

"You come highly recommended, Mr. Del mar."

"Call me Ennis, please. So you been talking to Mr. Stoutamire?"

"Stoutamire? Well I know that was where you were working, and he is a good man, but I got a call this morning from Jack Twist, said he remembered I told him about my situation and needed someone to take over for Hank. I've been dealing with Jack for years, I get all my farm equipment from Newsome. I trust his judgement implicitly. If he says you're a good worker, well that's good enough for me. So when can you start?"

Ennis managed to clear his head enough to say "Is tomorrow soon enough?"

"Sure thing, see ya tomorrow morning at 7."

The shock finally wore off by the time he got back to his trailer. He had dinner and sat outside on the little step staring up at the stars. A song was playing on the portable radio he left on. (Somewhere out there)

Maybe there might be some way they could be together, maybe someday. There always is hope.

Meanwhile in Texas.

Jack had managed to get back to Childress just after 10. Lureen and Bobby were fast asleep. He got a beer but he was too excited to sleep so he went outside and sat outside and looked up at the stars. He held the carving Ennis had given him in his hands. He remembered all the times they would sit out at night looking up at the stars on Brokeback and later at Pine Creek. Now it was almost like Ennis was here with him. He remembered the song he had playing in his truck just before he pulled his car up the driveway. It played in his mind as he stared up at the twinkling lights. (Somewhere Out There)

He dreamed of a life with Ennis, that maybe someday they'd both be looking up at the stars together in their own home. There was always hope.