This fanfic is a My Name is Earl/The Office crossover. Eventually, there will be a bit of JAM. Enjoy, and this is from Earl's point of view by the way.
Disclaimer: I do not own My Name is Earl or The Office.
I had done a lot of things on my list, but it was time to take care of #148: threw a water balloon at Dwight Shrute.
The incident had taken place at the 42nd annual Camden County Fair. It was a bright and sunny day – if we weren't at the fair, Randy and I probably would have been squirting each other (or other people) with water guns. Randy said he couldn't wait to see Smokey and the Bandit and The World's Shortest Giant.
That day at the fair, a company called Dunder Mifflin had a booth set up, and the employees of Dunder Mifflin were advertising their paper. Randy and I, as usual, were up to no good. The night before, we'd filled a whole bunch of water balloons, thinking it'd be funny to throw them at random people. It was Randy's idea, and he was kind of proud of it.
"Aww man Earl. Did you see the look on that fat guy on the Ferris Wheel's face when he got hit by my water balloon?" Randy asked me, laughing.
"Sure did Randy," I said, laughing pretty hard myself, "It was priceless. Hey! You see the weird looking guy? At that Dunder Mifflin booth?"
"Oh yeah. His name tag says," Randy paused and concentrated on reading the name tag, "Dwight Shrute."
"Dwight Shrute is about to get hit in the head with a water balloon," I said, and then
-SMACK- the water balloon burst as it hit Dwight's head. He screamed, and one of the other Dunder Mifflin people, a tall guy with brown hair and big ears, laughed.
And that's how #148 happened.
That morning, I looked Dunder Mifflin up in the hotel's telephone book, so I could talk to Dwight and make things right. Dunder Mifflin seemed to have a lot of branches, so I took a chance and called the Scranton one, hoping Dwight worked there.
"Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam."
"Hi Pam," I said, "I'm looking for Dwight Shrute, does he work at your branch?"
Pam tried not to laugh as she heard Dwight's name. Just that morning, Jim had put Dwight's stapler in Jell-O. As usual, Dwight had gone ballistic.
"Yes, he does work here," Pam had successfully stifled her laugh, "Hold on, I'll transfer your call."
A few seconds later, Dwight said, "Dwight Shrute, Assistant Regional Manager. To whom am I speaking?"
Nice going Earl, I thought, you threw a water balloon at the assistant regional manager of Dunden Muffler. "I'm Earl Hickey," I said. I explained about my list, and how I threw a water balloon at him.
"I'm just trying to be a better person," I ended.
Dwight was mad, "I can't believe you threw that water balloon at me, you're as bad as Jim Halpert!"
In the Dunder Mifflin office, Jim was sitting at his desk making a sales call. He looked up when Dwight said his name.
"Who's Jim Halpert?" I asked.
"An imbecile; he's tall and has really big ears," Dwight explained.
Oh, that's the guy that laughed when the water balloon hit Dwight.
"Hey!" Jim exclaimed. He knew that Dwight was talking about him. Dwight motioned for Jim to be quiet.
"But because of your stupid prank, we lost paper sales!" Dwight said, angry again.
"I'm really sorry, Dwight," I said, "What can I do to make it up to you?"
Dwight thought for a few minutes, "You and your brother - you mentioned a brother, didn't you? – can work as temporary sales workers at Dunder Mifflin Scranton."
Pam to camera:
"I don't know if I'd describe Jim as a tall imbecile with big ears, actually, um, he's pretty cu…well, he definitely isn't an imbecile." She stared down at her hands and blushed.