Grounds keeper. I tell the guy who's running this stupid miniature golf course that I'm good with technology and he makes me groundskeeper.

I hate golf. I hate miniature golf, and I hate most of all that creepy clown on the course...

Wait...that's...oh God, that's not part of the attraction. The clown on the course was wearing green not purple

Oh God, oh God, oh God, oh God, oh-

The Joker wasn't much of a theme villain lately. He'd let his penchant for theme crimes slide over the past couple of years, preferring to cause mayhem and wreck havoc wherever he went...

The Bat was starting to expect that sort of thing from him as a result.

So of course, in order to keep old Batsy on his toes, Joker decided that a theme crime was in order.

His target?

Jester Jones' Miniature Golf Course.

His method?

Fifty pounds of high explosive.

He'd just finished stuffing the last of the bright purple bombs into the large mechanical clown's head when he spotted a muddy groundskeeper staring at him, one hand wrapped around a book and the other holding a pencil.

He took great pleasure in noticing that her knuckles were white.

Joker cackled, waved daintily at the groundskeeper in her grubby uniform and winked.

Wisely, she dropped the book and pencil, turned green and ran.

All Joker could think was that maybe, just maybe there were still a few intelligent people left in this town.

A shame he was about to off one of the few smart ones that he'd had the pleasure of encountering recently...

Then he departed, letting the loud BOOM that shook the entire surrounding area work as his exit music.

The devastation at Jester Jones' was absolutely shocking. The entire course was practically wiped off the map, from the concession stand to the groundskeeper shack, there wasn't a single structure that hadn't been affected in some way.

By the time the fire department arrived, the rubble of the concession stand was starting to stir, three different forms immerging from the pile, and looking quite the worse for wear.

"That. Is. IT!" Techie shouted as the Captain and Al clawed their way out of the remains of the small building. "I have HAD it with this legitimate lifestyle thing! I am going back to a life of crime and never looking back!"

The Captain and Al glanced at each other before looking back at Techie.

"You mean it?"

"Really, really mean it?"

"Yes!" Techie exclaimed, flailing her arms for effect.

Captain made a 'squee' noise and both she and Al descended on Techie with rib crushing hugs.

"It's about time!"

"Can we rob a bank? Please? Please, please, pleeeeeeeease?" Captain chirped excitedly.

Techie wriggled a little bit, just enough so that she could breathe properly. "I've got a better idea."


"You ever hear of the Sellers' Emerald?"

Wondering what happens next? Check out my story "Luck of the Irish" to find out!