AN: Thank you to my lovely beta, Marcy, who is very prompt and punctual. Some of you have commented on the purpose of condoms in this little story. I assure you I understand that the condoms are not necessary as a method of contraception. I am also aware that vampires' bodily fluids are replaced with venom. Hence the need for condoms because I'm thinking for Bella's first time maybe it wouldn't be a good idea that she changed into a vampire.
Disclaimer: All the characters appearing in this work are copyright Stephenie Meyer and they are not used with permission. No infringement of these copyrights is intended, and all original characters are the property of Stephenie Meyer. No financial gain is being made by this work.
This Might Hurt by ECABS
I clicked the automatic locks of the Volvo, breathing a sigh of relief. I was safe. It was more frightening to be involved in Jasper and Emmett's extracurriculars than to fight a rogue. Fighting another vampire was clear-cut—no surprises there. Fists, hands, feet, legs. Kill your opponent. Sling shots, water balloon launchers, super soakers and any other homemade weaponry made to launch long "water balloons" was something I just couldn't handle. Of course, anyone with one iota of shame and decency would pick bloodthirsty vampires, too.
Relieved to be safe within my silvery cocoon, I headed down my drive. But I really wasn't escaping disaster. I was potentially headed into a minefield of awkward conversation, embarrassing innuendo, and hormonal chaos. Tucked safely into the jacket pocket were the condoms I had snagged from Jasper's overflowing pile of ammo. I was heading to Bella's house with condoms in my pocket. I shook my head. What the hell was I thinking? But, I knew exactly what I was thinking: Bella standing on her bed, swaying above me. And Bella stripping off the layers of clothing she was wearing.
Of course Bella was not like the lecherous teenage girls that prowled high schools these days. Even small towns like Forks weren't safe from these lusty girls. Jessica Stanley's flushed face came to mind and the disturbing images I caught running through her head at the time. The lascivious girl was visualizing doing some very indecent things to my brothers, god help me – Carlisle and me. Not necessarily in that order—apparently her motto was 'the more the merrier.' I shuddered. But Bella was no Jessica, or any other girl at Forks High for that matter. It made me wonder at her motivation. It was obvious she hadn't intended to go all the way. Otherwise she wouldn't have added the socks to the already ridiculous outfit. And I liked the way her mind worked. The act of removing clothing was more seductive then baring skin. And even though she didn't reveal a patch of ivory skin I would be lying if I said I wasn't turned on. Clumsy awkward strip tease and all. Of course the greatest pleasure came from the blush at the end of her routine. Well, not the end of her routine, because she wasn't quite finished when she tripped. I smiled at the memory. It was still her blood that held the greatest allure—pain and joy. She was right, I was a masochist.
So Bella wanted to please me. Her little stunt was about doing something for me. Maybe that meant she wanted more from our relationship? At the very least she had thought about our lack of physical…connection. Not that I wasn't physically attracted to her. How could I not be? Primal instincts aside, everything about her drew me in. But there was something that shone through the curves and pale skin. It was like buttery summer sunshine that even when you tried to ignore it, it beckoned you with its warmth. She pulled me in to her light and I was hopelessly addicted. The physical relationship wasn't what I needed. It wasn't what I craved.
We would talk. About everything, and I would explain it all to her. I would let her know what I felt for her—physically and spiritually. She would know that I wanted her in every way, but that we could wait. Surely her expectations didn't differ too greatly from mine. I patted the pocket that held the little square foils. Those were for just in case. It wouldn't hurt to see her reaction if she thought I wanted to go all the way. Maybe then I would really know what she was thinking. My smile grew as I sped through Forks.
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"Bella, sweetheart, please, just stay still…I don't want to hurt you."
"Edward – it's hurting!"
"I know, but that's because you keep moving. I really need you to not move. I need to get a good grip. If you keep wiggling around like you are then it's going to hurt. Now just hold still for a second."
"Ow, ow, ow, owwww! Edward, stop!"
"I haven't done anything yet! Bella, just focus on a point somewhere in the room and let me just get this painful part out of the way. You'll feel so much better in a minute, I promise."
"How about I look in your eyes instead. They're gold today." She sighed and her body finally eased.
"Okay. See that's better. Now on the count of three okay?" She nodded back at me, her eyes solemn and focused on mine.
"One… Two…" I grabbed her leg, keeping the skin taut under my firm fingers and tore the bandage away from the almost healed scrapes on her knee.
She yelped in pain and I placed my cool hand over skin that was turning red quickly from where the band-aid had almost melded with her skin.
"You said on three." Bella pouted.
"It's better to catch you off guard. And I wouldn't have had to trick you if you had listened to me in the first place. I told you to remove that band-aid days ago! It only gets worse the longer you leave it on. You should know that by now." I frowned at her, trying to keep the scolding look in place. She was beautiful when she pouted and I almost cracked a smile.
"I'm going to pretend that you didn't just rip a layer of skin off and make fun of me." Bella got up and headed for the living room. We had the afternoon to ourselves. It was a perfect opportunity to discuss our relationship. I was going to get to the bottom of her feelings and find out what she really thought.
I gave Bella my best seductive grin, "Why don't we go upst-" I quickly moved to catch Bella as she swayed on her feet. Maybe that was too much dazzling. Toning it down, I continued, "Why don't we go talk upstairs Bella?"
She simply nodded. When she didn't move I scooped her up in my arms and headed for the stairs. I held back the grin threatening to spread on my face as she gazed starry eyed up at me. I chuckled softly. "Keep breathing Bella."
I set her down carefully on the bed and focused on not consciously dazzling her. I wasn't sure how to broach the subject. Should I bring up her alter ego – Candy – the stripper? Or maybe I could start with something simple, like how long we've been 'dating'. Obviously our relationship couldn't exactly be defined by the word 'dating'. For one thing we were much more than just girlfriend and boyfriend; and such a normal term couldn't possibly apply to a century old vampire and his teenaged human fiancée. Human boys had never been a source of my wisdom, but perhaps, just this once I could use a little human experience. I tried to remember the thoughts teenaged boys had on the topic and how they addressed the issue. I was suddenly sorry I tried to recall what a hormone crazed human boy thought about sex. I recalled with vivid clarity why I had suppressed such memories in the first place. My mind was suddenly contaminated with Mike's thoughts on the topic in regards to Jessica. His strategy was show first talk later. How that boy played sports was a miracle, he obviously didn't possess any hand eye coordination. I shook my head and pinched the bridge of my nose.
"Edward, are you okay?"
"Are you sure? It looks like you're thinking about something really hard." She watched me as I paced. I stopped in front of her and stared.
"I'm just going come out and say it. It's about us…making love." Bella's mouth dropped.
"Bella, close your mouth. Knowing your luck something is going to fly in there."
She pressed her lips together dumfounded. A rosy blush crept from her cheeks towards her ears and down her jaw. It was almost too much to keep myself from trailing kisses down the curve of her neck. But I was pretending that I wanted to go all the way. Considering the topic of conversation and Bella's tantalizing smell if my lips touched her skin I could easily lose my focus. Not to mention Bella might just go into cardiac arrest if after that admission I follow up with seductive action.
I retreated towards the rocking chair to put some distance between us. I could dazzle her from there if she wasn't forthcoming with her thoughts about our intimacy.
I could almost hear the thoughts churning in that lovely head of hers. It was like being on the very edge of your cell phone network. If you took one-step forward your phone worked, an inch the other way and there was nothing but the annoying blinking words 'NO RECEPTION'. Only as I got closer to her, I could more easily guess what she was thinking, but there never was the echo of her beautiful soprano in my head. So I had to settle with watching her expression. Some of the faces she made almost made the torture of not knowing her every thought worth it. Especially in moments like these. I loved the concentrated look that came over her face when she was trying to slow her heart rate and ease the blood from her face.
"I love you Bella."
She licked her lips and swallowed. Along with the heady rose in her cheeks her mouth had gone dry. "I love you too, Edward." She gulped.
"I've been thinking a lot about us, Bella. Our relationship. What you mean to me. You being my fiancée and all." I grinned at that last comment. I knew she hated to be called that, but I'd like to think she was softening to the idea.
"Wait Edward, I never said ye-"
"It's okay Bella, I know. But we're not talking about my proposal right now. This is really about what we both want. Physically." I looked at her meaningfully.
She blinked a few times and said, "I...us…physically?" She cleared her throat.
I stopped and listened to the voices in my head. It was Rosalie and Alice. They were three minutes from Bella's house.
"Did you have plans with Alice and Rosalie today?" Alice hadn't said anything making plans with Bella. I wondered if she had a vision of Jasper and I in front of the convenience store.
She seemed thankful for the change in topic and instantly perked up, "Yes! Why? Is she here?" She stood up to go to the window, frowning as she pulled the curtain back. "Rosalie is with her?"
"Yes Rosalie is with her. What are you guys doing?"
"I'm not sure. She called right before you got here and said something about a girl's night. I didn't know Rosalie was coming." Her frown deepened.
"Bella, if Rosalie is coming, it's of her own accord. Oddly enough she really is trying." I went over to the window and put my arms around her, finally giving in and dropping feather light kisses down the curve of her neck. "It'll be fine. I'm sure it will. I'll miss you though. If you want I can tell them to come back another time and we can finish our discussion?"
"No. No. It's fine." She said a little too quickly and I rubbed my nose against the nape of her neck. "I'm sure you're right. Spending some time with Rosalie might be nice." She squirmed as my breath tickled her skin and she tried to sound cheerful at the prospect of spending the evening with Rosalie.
I turned her in my arms and kissed her gently, pausing long enough to savor every inch of her soft lips. She put her hand against my chest, inches from the condoms and I hoped she wouldn't feel them through the light fabric of my jacket.
I pulled away and grabbed her hand, towing her behind me as I went to get the door. I opened the door just as Alice and Rosalie climbed the steps, small carry-on luggage in tow.
I turned back to look at Bella's face. She recognized Alice's make up kit rolling to a stop behind the peppy looking Alice. "Did you change your mind about our talk?"
She ignored me and said, "Hey Alice!" And a little more shyly, "Hi Rosalie. How are you guys?"
"I guess not." I whispered to her.
"Okay buddy, playtime is over. This is a girl's only party. You're going to have to go." Alice pushed me out the door.
"Plus you really should get home Edward." Rosalie added.
Alice snickered, "Maybe the frozen water balloons weren't such a great idea."
"Frozen water balloons?" Bella and I both questioned.
"Well yesterday I went to all the convenience stores in town and bought out their supply of water balloons. I filled them and froze them last night. I figured Emmett and Jasper would have fun with something harder." She continued to giggle.
My eyes opened wide but before I could say anything Bella asked, "You bought water balloons at a convenience store? Why didn't you just go to the dollar store?"
Alice eyed me pointedly, "Well I was looking for the long, banana shaped ones." Rosalie and Alice both grinned exposing sparkling white teeth.
I cleared my throat, "Okay well I guess I better go then. I don't want to encroach on special girl time."
"Good idea Eddie." Rosalie smirked.
I growled a response but was cut short by Alice's words, "Now now Eddie, don't be so grumpy. You aren't upset that you don't get to use the condom in your front jacket pocket are you?"
My mouth opened but my mind was like space - a vast expanse of nothing. "Shut your mouth Edward, something might fly in." Alice and Rosalie giggled. Bella's shock registered on her face. Her eyes widened and her cheeks darkened once again to a deep red. Just as I was about to plead my case Alice shut the door.
I moved to pound on the door but Alice's warning rang through my head, 'Don't come back until Sunday morning or I'll tell her all about the water balloons and Coach Clapp.'