The Littlest Shepherd
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I think it's going to be a hassle for me and for you to be doing the exporting and the updating author's note... So I figured, might as well make this... Here we go...
If you haven't read the Littlest Shepherd, then go read it first!!! Cos' you won't find the humor on this one if you haven't... :D
--- --- ---Mischief # 1 - The Fatty Song
Looking Through Braeden's Eyes (Braeden's POV):
Aunt Crissy's making me watch the TV show with all the fake-looking doctors running around a hospital. They all think they're doing a great job, but really, they just make me laugh. Especially that funny-looking one who thinks too much. It's obvious that they haven't seen real doctors at work, like my Dada and my Mommy! They're like the bestest best doctors in the world.
There was a little boy a bit bigger than me and he was wiggling his little tushie around and singing a song to a big woman. I think he said fatty. Yes, he definitely said fatty. I giggled at the little boy and Aunt Crissy looked at me strangely. She probably thinks I can't understand stuff. Psyche! Hihihi. I am waayyyy smarter than they all think.
And then he starts chanting something else. Abortion. I wonder what abortion means? Hmm… Maybe in a few years or so, I'd know. But right now… I'm sleepy. I think I'd better start whining so that Aunt Crissy would take me up to bed.
I saw a big woman near the nurses counter and I thought what the heck, why not try out the new song I learned last night. I walk over to her and smiled at her sweetly before I started dancing and singing her my new song. I wonder why she's frowning and looking at me like that...
And then out of nowhere, in the middle of my song, Dada comes and carries me in his arms. He starts to say sorry to the lady. What was he sorry about? I was just singing her the song!
Then he sits me down on the counter. I never liked it in this counter. It means he's about to scold me over something so I try to giggle my way out of it. He asked me where I got the song and I say the title of the TV show with the fake-looking doctors.
And then he goes on about talking to strangers. Did I talk to the woman?
No! I just sang her a song.
I think it's time to say sorry now. And so I did. And then I kissed him, many, many times. That always gets him, especially when we're in front of a lot of people. He doesn't like to be kissed. Then he placed me down on the ground. Whew. That means he's not mad at me anymore.
He said we're going to go find Mommy. Yay! Mommy! Mommy's the best. She's the bestest best best best Mommy in the whole wide world! She always gives me kisses and hugs and she buys me stuff! We walk down the halls and then I see another big woman. I look at Dada and he was going inside a room so I go to the woman and start singing to her too.
And again, out of nowhere, Dada comes and carries me in his arms and says sorry to the lady. What did I do again? And this time, he covers my mouth with his hands. Have you ever smelled the hands of a doctor? They smell like rubber! Not like my rubber duckie though, yuckie rubber! Eww!
I see my Mommy and I shout her name out loud and I reach out to go to her, away from my Dada's yuckie rubber smelling hands. Yuck. Yuck.
She takes me into her arms and places a kiss on my head. See? She gives me kisses! Ain't she the greatest? –grins-
I look at Dada and Aunt Crissy. They're talking about the fake-looking doctors again and so I think this is the perfect chance to say what the kid said about abortion.
This time it was Mommy's hand that covered my mouth after I said the thing about abortion.
But my Mommy's hand smell great… Unlike Dada's yuckie rubber smelling hands. Ewww.
More to come. :D