A/N: Thanks to everyone for the wonderful reviews, I appreciate them greatly and I am very sorry for the long wait.



3. Fear


The spiking rain that had fallen like a waterfall down the windows had finally stopped. "Sam, for the last time, the answer is no."

"But, Dean," Sam said. "This is really really important. I have to go!"

"Says who?" Dean continued switching through the channels in the hope of finding something worth seeing. "You heard what Dad said."

"But that was before Tim called."

Dean turned off the television, realizing there was nothing on. "Look, Sammy. I get that you want to make friends and all, but Dad specifically told me…"

Sam wrinkled his nose. "Speci...cally?"

A smile played on Dean's lips. "Well, Dad really didn't want you to go anywhere."

Sam cut him off immediately. "But Dad doesn't have to find out."

"What?" Dean stared at his brother, knowing that those were the exact words he had muttered two years ago, when he was really supposed to stay with Sam. "No way."

Brown orbs were staring at him in accusation. "How come you can do what you want but I'm not 'lowed?"

And Dean realized just how important this seemed to be for Sam. More than wanting to be like his big brother, Sam wanted to have fun.

Dean sighed. "What exactly are you going to do then?"

Sam's eyes seemed to glow for a second. "We're gonna go see a movie, and then we're gonna eat at McDonalds." Sam looked at Dean, apparently waiting for him to say that this was the greatest thing. "Please, please can I go?"

And those puppy dog eyes were there, begging him to say yes.

How could he say no to them, when he knew he had never been able to?

"There will be someone with you, right?" Dean stared into Sam's face seriously.

His brother nodded. "Tim's Mom."

As he looked at his brother, at Sam's face that was practically shining with excitement he found that he couldn't take that piece of happiness away from him.

It was hard to believe that it had barely been an hour ago when Sam was crying, sitting on the bathtub.


"He called me a freak."

Dean was busying himself with cleaning the wound near Sam's eye, before looking at Sam. "What else did he say?" He asked harshly.

The younger boy before him lowered his eyes to the floor. "I don't remember."

"Sammy." Dean put one hand to the flushed skin of Sam's cheek. "You're no freak. You understand me?"

Tearful brown eyes blinked at him. "But…"

"What? You're going to listen to some idiot, but you won't listen to your big brother?" Dean playfully nudged Sam's side.

Sam cracked a small smile. "N-No."

"Trust me, kiddo," Dean said, as he fastened the band aid on Sam's red skin. "You've got nothing to worry about. I'm gonna take care of this."

"But what about Dad?" Sam asked, worrying his lip.

"What about him?"

"He sounded weird on the phone." Sam, stared at Dean with that expression that gave him the feeling that his eyes could penetrate his heart. "And he called early too."

"Sam, Dad's just really busy right now."

But Sam's eyes were now so bright with tears that they fell down his cheeks. "What if he's real hurt? What if he can't get home?"

"We'd know if he was hurt, Sam."

"No! He told you something and now…" Sam sniffed. "Now you won't tell me."

Catching his brother's arm before he could walk away from him, Dean turned Sam around so he could face him.

"Hey," he said. "Listen to me." Dean looked into Sam's eyes, shining with tears in a way that almost made him see himself mirrored in them. "If Dad was hurt, I would never keep it from you."

"You promise?" Sam breathed.

"Cross my heart."

"O-Okay," Sam said fingering his band aid.

"It's alright, kiddo. Dad will be okay."

"S'not alright. Dad's not here. He should be."

For a moment Dean wondered what exactly their father had told Sam, and why he had done it.

"You trust me, don't you?" Dean couldn't help asking his younger brother.

Sam nodded seriously.

"Then trust me when I say that you and me will be okay, just as Dad will be okay."

"You and me?" Sam's eyes seemed to light up for a moment, childish delight shining through.

"You and me," Dean said, following Sam's train of thought.

It only took him a second to catch up with his little brother and he tickled him mercilessly, the sound of Sam's laughter vibrating through him.


Sam seemed to be waiting for Dean to say something because his eyes never left Dean's. But Dean didn't know if he was ready to let Sam go when he'd been hurt earlier and so upset not too long ago.

Looking at his brother now though, he couldn't see anything but excitement in those large eyes.

Dean made up his mind. "If you're going anywhere, Sammy, you have to promise me something."


"Don't go anywhere on your own, and stay close to Tim and his Mom." Dean looked at his brother seriously, hoping he'd understand the importance of it.

He didn't know what he would do if something happened to Sam, and he wasn't around to protect him.

"I can do that," Sam said happily. Then he stared at Dean with a joyful expression. "Thank you! Thank you! You're the best big brother." The little figure of Sam threw himself over him.

"Well, of course I am the best big brother," Dean smirked as he hugged Sam. "Seeing as I'm your only big brother."

Sam giggled. "You're funny."

Dean rolled his eyes as Sam bounced to the phone, ignoring the feeling that told him he should make Sam stay home instead of going out.

As Natasha Harrison came with her son, Tim, Dean couldn't help breathing a sigh of relief. After what had happened earlier, Sam deserved this, this moment of happiness.

It was clear to Dean that Tim's mother was good with kids. Maybe it was the fact that she was a mother, but she was definitely smiling the moment she saw Sam.

Her gray eyes were searching Dean's eyes questioningly, as if asking if there was an adult with them.

"Hello, Sam," she greeted his brother. "Are you ready to go?"

"Yeah," Sam said joyfully. "Thanks for letting me come," he added politely.

"Oh, it's no problem, honey," Natasha smiled at him.

"Hold it, Tiger!" Dean stopped Sam from going any further.

"Dean, I have to go now!" Sam said, impatience clear in his voice.

"Without your shoes tied?" He raised his brows at his brother. "I don't think so." Before Sam could look down, Dean bent down and tied them.


"Have fun, kiddo," Dean laughed, ruffling his hair fondly.

Sam grinned up at him. "I will."

"Are your parents here by any chance?"

Dean stiffened slightly. This was something adults tended to ask, and the answer now came automatically. "Dad will be back soon. I'm taking car of Sammy while he's gone. So…"

"Dean!" Sam interrupted.

"Well I guess we should be on our way then," Natasha laughed quietly, as Tim and Sam raced to the car.

"I guess so," Dean smiled slightly, watching Sam shut the door of the blue Volvo.

Well, I'll drop off Sam at eight. Will that be alright?"

"It's fine."

As the door shut closed, Dean wondered how wise it was to let Sam go with two strangers, with a boy Sam had just barely befriended. But in the end he knew it was the worry for his father that made him more alert than usual, because he knew he couldn't let anything happen to the youngest Winchester.


Sam had never seen a cinema so crowded.

There were so many people. He could barely see where they were going. Mostly he could see people that were just a little older than him, but there were also those who looked like giants compared to Tim and him.

"Okay, boys, let's stick together now. There are a lot of people here, and we don't want to get lost, do we?"

They both shook their heads.

"Alright," she said, pocketing their tickets. "Who wants some popcorn?"

To Sam, the popcorn looked like solid tiny clouds coated with a sunny yellow, lying inside of that big glass box. Amazed, Sam watched as the popcorn bags with the pictures from their movie on them, were filled to the top with popcorn.

The movie they were going to see was an animated one, and Sam happily pointed out that the car on the movie poster looked just like the one his dad was driving.

"Let's go boys," Tim's mom said.

Sam liked Tim's mom.

She bought candy and popcorn for him and Tim. When they were waiting to be let inside the movie theater, she'd told them a funny story that had made Sam laugh. He silently wondered if his mother was anything like Tim's mom.

All he knew was what Dean had told him, and he knew what she looked from staring at all the pictures from that time he couldn't remember no matter how hard he tried.

Sam knew that if someone was that beautiful, they had to be some kind of angel. Sometimes he wondered if she was looking down at him from somewhere in the sky. When the stars were crying, and the rain was pouring down where he was, was that his mom being sad too?

Sam wished he knew, because he knew what it felt like to be sad too.

Even if it had been a bad dream, Sam couldn't help thinking that it had brought him closer to his mother, closer than any of Dean's stories ever could.

It made him feel less sad.

"Sam, look!" The urgency in Tim's voice made him look up.

He was pointing to the line under the big red number shaped like the number one. They were now starting to let people into the theater where the movie was about to be shown.

As they walked up to the front of the line, Tim's mom handed the ticket taker their tickets. In Sam's very own opinion, their seats had to be the best. They were right in the middle of the cinema theater, their seats higher up than all the people sitting in front of them.

The movie was about Turbo, the car, who met a boy who was lost, and suddenly they were on the greatest adventure together. When Sam saw all the cars, he wondered if Dean would have liked the movie since he was always talking about cars.

The only part that was scary was the part when a truck pushed Turbo over the other side of the highway, making it tumble down into the water.

But Turbo had secret superpowers.

"Woah," Sam whispered, when the car lifted itself out of the water due to the special wheels it had.

As the movie ended, Sam followed Tim and his mom up the stairs, but all of a sudden there were too many people coming in between Sam and his company to the cinema.

Finally, Sam made it to the top of the stairs and went through the door that everyone seemed to be walking through.

But there was no one there. It was completely empty. Sam couldn't figure out where all the other people had gone.

"Hello?" He asked.

There was no answer.

Maybe it wasn't the right door. It looked like he was now somewhere he'd never been before, but now there were too many doors that came into his line of vision. How was he supposed to know which one was the right one?

There were voices coming from the stairs. Maybe there was someone there who knew the way out.

Fear was already starting to crush his heart, but the need to get to Tim and his mom was greater.

He didn't even want to think about what his brother would say if he found out that Sam had gotten lost.

No. He was going to have to get out of this on his own. Silently he wondered how Dean could be so brave when he would confront the scary stuff.

Ignoring his shaking legs, Sam slowly made his way down the stone steps, listening for the source of sounds he'd heard.

It was only when he'd reached the bottom of the stairs that he realized that there was a dark feeling to this part of the building. It was almost like the darkness that always came when he was about to go to sleep.

Now he could hear those voices growing louder, even though they were coming from outside.

Carefully, Sam moved closer to the big door, trying to peek outside. The door was one of those cool doors made of glass and it swung open automatically, barely without a sound.

Outside the building, Sam realized he was now in the back of the building, but he also knew he wouldn't be able to find his way out of there by himself.

Through the panic that was steadily coming over him, he knew he had to ask the people standing a bit further away from him, apparently not seeing him.

What he hadn't expected to see were two big men, looking big enough to be giants. They were holding something in front of another man, who was slightly shorter.

"Give it here," one of the giants roared. "Now!"

The man standing in front of them seemed to stiffen. "Just take it easy, alright."

Sam could see something silvery glittering now. "You think we're kidding around, don't you?"

Now at the age of seven, Sam knew a lot of things.

He knew that he had to hold Dean's hand when they crossed the street, and that We'll see´often meant No´. Sam also knew, even though his dad and Dean were careful to keep it from him, they were talking about scary and dangerous things. He'd learned that if he mentioned his mom, the air would start to rip with electricity just as loud as fireworks.

But what he knew without ever really learning it, was that there were some situations which he should avoid. There were some situations that just screamed scary about them.

And this one was one of them.

It was with shock Sam saw what he now realized was a knife, cutting through the man's skin. It created pearls of dark blood on his skin, the skin that was his neck.

"P-Please…l-let's…" The man was begging now.

Sam wanted to scream, but he felt like no sound could ever come out of his mouth. It was like a big fist was stuck in his throat, making it hard to breathe.

He wanted to get out of there, to run, but now it was as if he'd become glued to the ground like a statue.

His heart was pounding in his ears, drowning out all the voices, the sound of its beats screaming inside of him.

Sam would have given anything not to be there when that red color seemed to drown the innocent man who hadn't done anything wrong.

He'd given anything not to see that silvery knife go through the man, making him fall down on the ground with a silent scream.

But most of all, Sam would have given anything not to hear that cold laughter that felt like shards of ice in his chest.

The two men seemed to be searching for something before they left him, and Sam found himself wondering what it was.

But why had they been so mad at the man? Sam knew people got mad sometimes, his dad did and sometimes Dean too.

Although, when they got mad they seemed to be able to see something in Sam that Sam himself couldn't see, and then they were okay.

If Dean had been in Sam's position though, Sam knew he would have saved the man. But he hadn't been able to, and he wondered if that made him a bad person.

Because you were supposed to help people. Everyone knew that.

Even though Sam knew he should start moving in the other direction to find Tim and his mom, Sam slowly took small steps towards the fallen man.

It took a moment for Sam to get used to the sight of him. Would he ever be able to look at the color red without seeing that dark red that was now coloring the man?

His eyes were closed. The jacket he wore was damp with a dark red now, and Sam wished he could do something, anything to help him.

But he couldn't.

"Sorry," Sam whispered sadly, in a voice that he couldn't recognize as his own.

Covering the man's chest with his own jacket, Sam hoped the man would forgive him for not being able to save him.

After he did so, Sam ran faster than he had ever done in his life. Maybe even faster than his big brother could.

Sam hadn't realized in which direction he'd gone until he tripped, falling onto the concrete. He thought he could see those men now, but he couldn't stop.

He had to keep running.

But it felt like his legs had turned into rubber now.

"Hey, kid," a deep voice roared. "Where do you think you're going?"

It was that man, the man with the knife.