Dear fanfiction connoisseurs,

I have to say that I appreciate your clicking the link, since the market for humorous fanfiction is disappointingly low, but nevertheless, I warn you- what follows is the result of my malnourished, maladjusted self from the ages of thirteen to fourteen, fueled mostly by black coffee and my own antisocial tendencies. It's a novel completed by a high school freshman with a high school freshman's sense of humor. (I'm much funnier now, I promise.) And it's fanfiction. And also, it's about vampires. I just want you to really examine those facts and think about what you're getting yourself into.

I've kept it up, partially for nostalgic purposes and a kind of "never again," because people seem to review it kindly, and find it amusing. But I'm 18, and I've been accepted to four colleges now, and I have no plans to go back and revise a middle schooler's idea of being internet popular, or even really to look at it if I don't have to. I appreciate your kind emails and encouragement, but when I see the number in my inbox, I think it's from Facebook, and then I see that it isn't, and I'm sad.

So truth be told, if you do decide to take on this project, I would be just as warmed if you smiled where appropriate, frowned where appropriate, and closed out of the window rather than clicking the review button.

Thanks for your readership, if I haven't sufficiently warned you away.

-Summer, 3/3/11