Disclaimer: Okay, for the last time, me no owney Inuyasha.
Again, thanks to the reviewers. I hope you've enjoyed reading this as much as I have enjoyed writing it.
Inuyasha and the others were still interrogating Finley, who now was reverted to her normal (if you could call it that) state thanks to Sango whispering something... seductive... into Sesshomaru's ear.
"Okay, Finley, I'll ask you again: How do we send you back to your own time and place?" Sesshomaru asked her, staring coldly into her eyes.
"Why don't you send me down the well like I want you to?" Finley whined.
"Because, we'd have to give you our jewel shards!" Inuyasha shouted angrily into her face.
"Ew, you need a tic tac!" Finley bitched.
"Yeah, and YOU need a fist in the mouth!"
"Inuyasha." Sesshomaru said, getting Inuyasha's attention, which was... his purpose, I suppose. Why else would you say someone's name?
"The next time I ask Finley this question and she doesn't answer, I want you to cut her to pieces."
Inuyasha smiled evilly, "Oh, you bet I will."
"It won't work! I won't sustain any permanent injuries!" Finley said to them.
"We'll see about that!" Inuyasha yelled, pulling out the Tetsaiga and swinging it at her, chopping her head off...
...or so he thought.
"What...? But... but I felt it connect with your neck, it should have killed you!" Inuyasha stammered, seeing that Finley was not scathed in the least.
"My God... we may never be able to get anything out of her." Sesshomaru thought to himself.
"Wait a second! Guys, I'll be right back, I have an idea!" Kagome declared, running out of the old shack.
"Where are you going, Kagome?" Inuyasha yelled after her.
"First of all, I'm going to go see if the well is intact. If it is, I'm going to go to my time and bring something useful back!" Kagome told him.
"Okay. But try not to be forever!"
"I won't. Oh, and Inuyasha?"
Inuyasha was pressed into the ground while Kagome ran in the direction of the well.
"I don't know what you see in that woman." Sesshomaru said to his brother, while keeping an eye on Finley.
"Me neither." Inuyasha said weakly, spitting wood and teeth chunks.
"Hey, can you make the rope more loose? I'm getting rope burn." Finley asked.
"You must think we're really foolish, little girl." Sesshomaru remarked.
"No, but it huuurrrrts..." Finley whined.
"We don't caaarrreee." Inuyasha said, mocking her.
Moments passed as Sesshomaru, Inuyasha, and Sango sat down in the shack, eyeballing Finley like a hawk to make sure she didn't try to turn into another seductress. Finally, Kagome came into the shack with a plastic baggie.
"Oh, God... that smell... that heavenly smell..." Finley sighed euphorically as tears formed in her beady eyes.
"What's in the bag?" Sango asked.
"It's McDonald's. No fatty can resist the sheer overwhelming taste of fast food, especially McDonald's. Luckily, they have one in Japan, which explains why Hojo's gained so much weight." Kagome said, pulling out some fries.
"Please, oh, please..." Finley choked out as Kagome slowly put one fry in her own mouth like it was a penis. Sesshomaru caught on to Kagome's insidious plan, and he picked up a fry and held it up to Finley's face.
"This little piece of what appears to be edible weed can be all yours if you tell us where you come from and how we can get you back. We don't really care HOW you got here." Sesshomaru slowly instructed her, making sure every word sunk in.
"...Make it five, and I'll tell you." Finley said, not taking her eye off the fry.
SO HE DID. Finley proceeded to tell them that she was not only from a different time and place, but from an entirely different dimension, and that she could go back to that dimension at will, any time, any place.
"So, what are we going to have to do to send you back?" Sesshomaru asked skeptically, believing that every word Finley said was total horseshit.
"Just...please, give me that food." Finley begged. Kagome put the sack into Finley's hand. Finley then slowly vanished into thin air.
"Wow... she wasn't lying." Sesshomaru said, amazed.
"Sesshomaru." Sango called out of Sesshomaru from the door of the shack, grin on her face. Sesshomaru walked out with her.
"Well, everything's back to normal." Inuyasha said.
"Well, besides Miroku, Shippo and thousands of other people being dead. SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT!" Kagome yelled, for no real reason.
"THAT'S IT!" Inuyasha screamed after getting up, running out of the shack and as far away as he can.
"I wonder where he's going." Kagome said.
So, here's the epilogue: Sesshomaru and Sango stayed together forever, Inuyasha hung out with Sesshomaru for the rest of his life, never being told to sit again, Sesshomaru and Inuyasha at least acted civil to each other, and Kagome went back to her own time, grew up, and stopped being a giant bitch. A happy ending for all, right?
Deep in the bowels of Finley's room, Finley wolfed down the food and then went to her computer.
"I lost in the Inuyasha universe, but I just know that I can find a world where I can fool everybody into loving me. But, where? I've got it! Instead of trying another anime, I'm going to try Teen Titans! Robin, Beastboy, here I come!"
So Finley schemed her newest character, preparing to bring her presence into the wide world of Teen Titans...
(Author Note: I tried to do a Pa-Ro-Dy Sue 3, but I lost interest. If anyone wants to pick up where I left off and do a third one of these in the Teen Titans section, you can.)