A/N This is it…
'I close my eyes, feeling the water as it dripped and trickled down my body and my face. "Christ is in the fire…my dad used to tell me that. He's a bit of a pyromaniac."
"Hmm…" Larxene murmured as she placed her hands on my face and wipes away two "sky-tears" as she called them. "That's a nice saying; it goes well with mine…we're like a puzzle; we fit together."
"I love you, got it memorized?" I asked, in a flirty kind of voice.
She giggled, kissing me.
"Axel," she whispered, pulling away to lean against my chest.
"Don't let me go…" and the memory changed. "If you let go, I'll fall…"
Suddenly, I'm forced away, my back making contact with something hard. "LARXENE!" I called out, but all she does is smile a sad smile, before fading into nothing.
"No…please…I NEED her!" I pleaded to no one in particular, but everything turned dark, color bled away, I woke up.
My eyes flash open as I sit up in bed, breathing heavily. I blink a few times, adjusting to the waking world. I'm covered in cold sweat, and my hair went flat over night.
Tears prick at my eyes; "That wasn't real…none of it…she isn't dead…no one's out to get you or her. Listen to me Axel, Larxene is alive…got it memorized?"
But I can't convince myself. It felt so real…all of it.
"Axel!" someone calls.
"Larxene?" I stare at my closed door, daring to hope. I close my eyes, willing it to be her. Please, god, please just do this one thing for me…
I hear the door open; "Roxas wanted me to tell you that breakfast is ready…" I open one eye and see…
"Oh…okay…I'll be there in a sec," the blonde nods before leaving. I close my eyes tightly, tears pouring down my face. "Can't let Roxas see you like this…he'll freak out and act all parent-y," I tell myself.
But even after I get up, even after I look at my blood shot eyes in the mirror, even after I eat breakfast with Roxas and Namine…I can still feel Larxene between my arms, crushed against my chest.
It's the afternoon, all of us are heading down to The Islands; a small cluster of land masses where Sora, Kairi, Riku, Tidus, Selphie and Wakka all used to hang out. We're supposed to play around on the beach and then watch the sunset…
I'm a little scared to see Axel. What if he blames me for Larxene now? What if…what if he hates me?
And what about Riku; where do we stand? Are we still dating…or are we broken up? I don't know…he acts like he still loves me; at least around Kairi. But I can't deny that, this feeling I have, is love…deep and confusing and illogical…almost obsession but not quite. Since the first time I met him I've liked him, but it was only a slight attraction then, nothing big. But now, now it's become all too important.
I don't think I could stand it if I lost him. It must hurt so much for Axel; to have lost the one person he cared about more then anything…I can't even imagine it.
"Sakura…" Selphie says waving a hand in front of my face; "you're spacing out again."
"What—oh, sorry," I dodge a short man that I almost tripped over. I pause a second, before continuing on. Kairi is walking on Selphie's other side…she's been a complete and total wreck ever since Riku…ever since I came here really.
I've caused so much trouble, just like I always do. Except this time, it's ended in death. I'm doomed to cause tragedy and horror to everyone I care about. I'm nothing but a problem.
"Hey guys," Sora says, after turning around the corner. He appeared out of nowhere, and I almost slam into him.
"Whoops, sorry, spaced out…again."
Sora shakes his head; "That's okay Sakura. It was my fault," and when he looks at me I see a momentary glint in his eyes, a same wanting and desire that I've seen many times before.
Could it be that…he…Sora likes—No, impossible; he and I—no, him and Kairi BELONG together; that's how it's always been. Namine knows it, Roxas knows it…everyone knows it.
"Are the others with you?" I ask, forgetting my thoughts.
"Yeah, they should be coming around the corner any minute now…"
A second later, Roxas, Namine, and Axel finally appear. I look for Riku, but he's nowhere to be seen. I sigh mournfully. He must be avoiding me, definitely a break up sign.
"I guess…we should get going then—"Roxas says, but is interrupted.
"Sakura!" someone yells.
I turn; my eyes wide.
Riku is there, running towards me. His muscular legs propel him in my direction, his silver hair is flowing behind him and his eyes are glowing with something…a feeling that grips me in iron fingers. Is it—?
He slams into me, his lips and mine collide together. There's an awkward silence, before I'm drawn into the kiss, consumed by it. His arms tighten around my body; he leans in farther, driving his tongue through me.
"I'm…sorry…" he whispers, between kisses, "I'm…sorry…for avoiding…you…I…didn't know…if you wanted…to break up with me…do you?"
I kiss him back, letting my own tongue mingle with his; "N-no…I would never…I…love you, Riku…never leave me…ever."
"A-agreed…" he kisses me again, and I feel his fingers on my bare arms, and their touch is like a thousand volts of electricity, lighting me up like a Gothic Christmas Tree.
I smile against his lips and he smiles against mine. A couple minutes—hours, days, years?—later we break apart. We look around, to see the shocked stares of our friends.
"Sorry for the hold up," Riku grins, "I had business."
"We can see that," Selphie and Tidus say at the exact same time.
"Where's Wakka?" I ask, desperate to change the subject.
"Don't know," Tidus says; "he told me he wouldn't be able to make it."
There's a short silence, before; as if on cue, we all start moving. Sora waves his hands in the air frantically; "Wait! We need to wait for Angel!"
"Who?" everyone asks.
"She's a…friend…" he looks around halfheartedly, "I guess…she's not coming." He sighs, glumly. Then we're all moving again. A part of me wonders who this Angel girl is…maybe a Kairi replacement? But another part (the majority) is begging for Riku's lips, screaming for them. I want to kiss him, now more then ever.
As we pass into the Destiny Islands shopping center, I see a coffee shop over Riku's shoulder. I turn and look, noticing a familiar face.
There, right by the window, is Wakka and Miss Lulu, chatting away. She's smiling (I've never seen her smile before) and he's grinning like his life depends on it.
Then suddenly, the teacher closes the space between them, kissing him on the lips. My eyes widen as I watch. Then Wakka breaks away and notices me staring. He looks at me with wide eyes, begging me to forget about it.
I nod, and wink, before turning back.
Well, at least Wakka's happy. And I am too…because Riku just grasped his hands in mine, and I felt a blush on my cheeks, and he kissed me just for the hell of it.
We finally arrive at the Islands. We all move mechanically, Tidus tries to play pass back with Selphie, but abandons the attempt. She runs towards him, and they start kissing, before falling into the water with a splash.
Namine and I sit on the Palm Tree, and its outstretched branch, Riku is leaning against it, with Sakura in his arms. Axel is sitting a little ways to the left, his legs crossed, looking burnt and broken.
I can see Destiny. Axel takes the form of withering flames, exasperated, destroyed…black.
Namine looks like sunshine and art and beauty, dancing about in a tornado of brilliance. I kiss her cheek, and she strokes the side of my face.
I can see Riku from this angle, in all of his bravado. He looks like darkness, tempting, screwy…misunderstood. I close my eyes, noticing how he and the shadow that is Sakura fit perfectly together, like a puzzle.
Somewhere far away, I can see Larxene, no longer substantial, a lost equation in the great math problem that is Destiny. She is the remainder, the random factor…the lost number.
It's sad, that Axel has to go through all this pain. I wish there was something I could do to help, but there just isn't. I try and I try to give, but I only end up screwing stuff up even more. So, for the time being, I'm staying out of it—everything.
"Oh god…" Namine says, cocking her head to one side.
I look where she's looking, at Sora, standing motionless as the water washes over his bare feet. And behind him, an approaching cloud of painted fire.
"What're you doing here?" I ask, before she can even say anything. My voice feels cold and disconnected, even to my own ears.
"I came too…I mean I—I don't know," she finishes, lamely. I sigh, resisting the urge to roll my eyes. I'm not like that, if anything I should hear her out.
My fingers fumble absentmindedly with my anniversary necklace, the tiny silver crown with my name engraved. It smells like her, when I touch it I can almost feel her lips on mine…I can almost taste her.
It's poisoned with memories.
I watch as the sun starts to set, the sky becoming a barrage of pinks and reds, looking almost evil against the now-black clouds.
"I want us to…go back. I want to be how we used to be," she says, with force, as if it's a command. That's so typical of her.
"We'll never be how we were," I say, almost coldly. It would be icy if I could get my voice to do that. But no, all I can do is try to be optimistic about this. All I can do is stand here and pretend that I don't want Kairi to love me.
But that's a lie.
I want her so bad that it hurts. I still need her, even though she tore my heart to pieces.
"But why can't we be? I'm apologizing!" she says, as if I didn't know that already.
I consider telling her that I still love her, that I still want her. But instead I shake my head; "Is that supposed to mean something? Did Riku tell you to say all this?"
She's silent, for once. I've probably hit a nerve.
"Do me a favor and—"
"Sora, I love you," she whispers, from behind me. I turn, small splashes of water surrounding my feet. The ocean has become black, just as the sky has…just like my heart.
"Kairi…no, you can't just love someone and then stop loving them…that's not how it works."
"Quiet!" I tell her, turning, suddenly angry. "No, no, no, no, no, NO! I DON'T want to be with you. I DON'T want you to love me and I. Don't. Need. You." The words are so good to say, they feel like magic on my lips.
She shakes her head, and her eyes are sad. And she turns, and I turn. My hands dance over the crown-necklace, feeling my name, engraved into the silver.
She turns, hope in her eyes.
"You can have this back," I unclasp the necklace, holding it out and letting it fall into the sand. She stares at it for a few moments, eyes wide with shock.
She mouths a single word; "No…" and then she snatches it from the ground. She turns and runs, tears pouring down her face.
And I feel great.
She runs past, red hair flying in the wind, her sobs echoing all around. I start to follow her, but Roxas grabs my hand, shaking his head.
"No. She needs to be alone."
I accept that, falling back onto my seat. Nearby, Tidus and Selphie are making out in the water, Axel is leaning against the wood…Riku is kissing Sakura's neck. None of them seem to care that Kairi's in pain.
None of them want to care.
I squeeze Roxas' hand. We both know that our friends aren't okay. We both know that it'll take awhile to be okay.
We have a few months left of school, before graduation. Surely that's enough time to save our friendships…right?
I push my face closer to Roxas', I soak in the Destiny that surrounds him. I absorb the never ending flames that make him.
"I love you."
And then we're kissing.
A/N Well, I thought I'd end it on a sad yet happy note. Mostly sad, sorry SoKai fans. I might make it up in Livid Love. Who knows, they could get back together…you'll have to wait and see.
Thanks to everyone who's reviewed. I'm so glad that we went through this together. An entire story of Teen Angst and hardships. I don't think that I could've done it alone.
So I ask only one more thing from you. You see, after I'm done editing this story I'm going to print it out, in its entirety. Then I'm going to put it in one of those clear folders and then I'm going to label it "Rocky Relationships". But, to do this, I'm going to need a cover for it.
That's where you come in. Loyal readers…you can draw a cover for Rocky Relationships! It can have whatever you want. Just make sure it includes something that has to do with Rocky Relationships, and the words "Rocky Relationships" on it somewhere in big lettering.
Please do this for me.
I've been making a play list thing, for some of the Rocky Relationships characters. So far I've only come up with Sora's:
Livin Lavida Loca by Ricky Martin (Sora to Kairi). Listen to the song; it's how Sora thinks of Kairi before all their troubles started. It's an old "party" kind of song…Of course there's more:
Snow White Queen by Evanescence (Xemnas to Larxene), it talks about how Xemnas likes Larxene in a stalker kind of way, and how afraid of him she is. That's all the ones I have right now. I'll do more when Livid Love is done.
I also have a new story idea. Okay, it goes like this:
Zoo York: What happens when Roxas is a singer in a New York band, and when Namine is a shy small town girl just looking for excitement? Well, my latest story of course. Basically, Roxas forms a band with Riku and Sora, and their manager just happens to be Axel under the Thirteenth Record Label (this is AU by the way). Namine comes to New York in the hopes of starting a fresh and exciting life. She meets up with Kairi, who attends all the shows of "Kingdom Hearts" the band consisting of, you guessed it, Sora, Riku and Roxas. Namine and Roxas hit it off, and Kairi tries to show Sora her moves. But there are problems on the horizon…
Yeah, I thought of it on the way to the Airport. I think it's a pretty great idea, but you tell me. This is one of those chapters that you HAVE TO review for.
Oh, and there's even MORE ideas that are flowing through my mind!
Growing up: Sora, Riku and Kairi have returned from their grand adventure, with tons of stories to tell. Wakka and Selphie are amazed, but Tidus is jealous. He wants to have an adventure, and when he meets a mysterious woman on the beach, me makes a deal to exchange his soul for an adventure. So, Tidus finds himself in Hollow bastion, with a strange sword and no sense of direction. Then he meets the elusive fairy, Yuna, who has the secret dream to become life sized. So Tidus searches for a way to give Yuna a full sized body; while dodging the soul-stealing witch who started this adventure. Tidus-centric non-AU; takes place a couple months after the events of KH 2.
And here's a Harry Potter idea I'm having:
Vengeance: Draco killed Ron, Hermione wants revenge, and she'll kill to get it. With her sanity slowly seeping away, Draco must dodge a murderous witch bent on revenge, the Ministry of Magic, and angry Death Eaters. How will he survive? And what about the strange love he's feeling for a particular pursuer? Draco/Hermione fic, four years after HPDH.
Thank you all! Until next time! (Fades into the sunset, never to be seen again).