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A/N: Wow, am I really posting another oneshot!?! Yes! This is like... my 7th oneshot, lol. I need a life... but w/e. Anyway... this one is kind of short, but I think its kinda cute, haha. Yeah, so I really hope you guys like it! And please REVIEW at the end!!


I know that it's probably really weird that I like to stand outside in the rain. I know that most other girls would probably freak out about their hair. I know that my love for the rain is probably the reason why I often find myself in the hospital wing, getting a pepper-up potion for the numerous colds I get. I know all of these things, and yet whenever it rains, I always find myself outside in the middle of the night. For some reason it just helps me to clear my head. Where I am doesn't really matter. All that matters is that I'm outside in the rain, and that I know a good drying charm for when I decide to go back in.

I know is that if I was ever to get caught, I would get a detention at least for being out after curfew, and yet once again I don't care. For some reason, the rain changes me. Tonight is one such night, when the moon is hidden behind the clouds and the water is pouring down from the sky, and so it finds me sitting on the ledge of the Astronomy tower, looking out over the grounds and feeling the gentle pitter patter of the rain on my skin.

The grounds look very peaceful at night. No bratty first years running around, no stuck up sluts talking about who they did last night. Just the rain and the cool night air are around me.

Another thing about my little routine is that no one knows that I do it. During my younger years, I always snuck out without making any noise. Now that I'm Head Girl I have my own dorm, which makes that a heck of a lot easier. And still, after seven years, no one knows. Not Alice, my best friend since first year. Not any of my other friends. Not even James, my boyfriend of almost three months knows.

I sometimes feel guilty about not telling James. Sometimes I get really close to telling him, but I always talk myself out of it. It's not that I've never had the right opportunity, because that's not it at all. There have been plenty of nights alone in the heads common room with him (he's Head Boy) when we are just snuggling together on the couch when I could have told him, but I just never have. It just isn't something I want to share. Not that it's so weird when you really think about it, there certainly are worse things I could be doing, but I just like to keep it as my own little secret.

I readjust slightly, so that both of my feet are hanging over the edge of the tower. I admit that sometimes when I do this I get a little bit scared, but there is a nice convenient pole that I can hold onto to make sure that I don't fall. I've done it at least a hundred times before, and I'm still here, aren't I?

I sit like that for a few more minutes before I hear some faint noise behind me. I turn around sharply, but I don't see anything. It's probably just a ghost, and although that would probably scare the living daylights out of anyone normal, ghosts are kind of a given at Hogwarts.

A few moments later, I hear something again, only this time much closer and louder. I whip around again to see the door to the astronomy tower standing open, but no one standing there. My heart is going about a million miles an hour as I look around frantically for what caused the noise.

I let go of the pole I'm holding and grip the ledge that I am sitting on, my knuckles slowly turning white. I look out over the grounds again, trying to tell myself that it's nothing, when I hear another noise. I whip around to see James standing right next to the door, a mixture of shock and heartbreak on his face.

"Lily?" he asks, his voice shaking slightly. My hands fly up from the ledge and I cover my mouth with them, trying to hold in a gasp. I move to swing a leg up and around the wall when suddenly I find myself slipping.

Wind rushes past my ears and I eventually work out that I'm falling. I'm falling off of the astronomy tower. I look up at James and see him reach for his wand before I become too far away to see him clearly. I vaguely register in the back of my mind that the rain has stopped before everything around me fades into darkness.


You don't look so good, Lily. A voice comes floating through my ears. A very familiar voice. And I feel a very familiar hand gripping mine as well. Why is that familiar?

Of course, you'll always look good to me, but you laying there almost totally lifeless is kind of a hard thing to see for me. James. That's who the owner of the hand and the voice is. James, my boyfriend.

How are we doing Mr. Potter? Another voice joined the mix, and I realize that this one belongs to Madame Pomfrey, the young mediwitch who replaced the old one after she decided she had fixed her last broken bone.

Not too great. James sounds tired. Very tired. Has he not slept in a while?

You just hang in there, my boy. I hear footsteps dying away, and I think that we are alone again.

You hang in there too, Lily, he mutters. Hold on a minute. I'm lying in the hospital wing with an exhausted James holding my hand and talking to me. This can't be a normal routine.

Of course, you are hanging in there pretty darn well for someone who fell off of the astronomy tower. Astronomy tower… that's right. I was in the rain and I fell off of the astronomy tower. When was that again? Friday night? When is it now? Saturday, Sunday?

But I mean it's been a week Lily; you have to wake up soon, right? A week… wow. Wait, did he say 'wake up?' Why am I not up? I can certainly hear what he is saying. But wait… for some reason I can't move. I can't open my eyes, move my hand, anything. Am I paralyzed? I try to open my mouth only to find that I can't talk either. I can't be paralyzed, because most people who are paralyzed can talk, right?

I'm a wreak without you, Lily. I can imagine. If his tired voice is any kind of clue, I can only guess what he looks like.

Why did you do it, Lily? Why did you jump? Hang on! Jump? I don't remember much about that night, but I certainly know that I would never jump off of the astronomy tower. And I know for a fact that I didn't. I was surprised and I slipped. That's all! But then again, he doesn't know about my love for the rain, so he probably was wondering what I was doing there in the first place.

Were you really that unhappy? And why didn't you tell me if you were? He's whispering. It really is breaking my heart to listen to this. I try again to speak, but I can't. Am I in a coma? But doesn't being in a coma mean no brain activity whatsoever? No thoughts? Because I can certainly hear everything he is saying.

Was it… because of me? He is past a whisper now, and if I could move I probably would have leaned my ear closer in order to better hear him.

Was it dating me that made you so upset? Because call me crazy, but I thought we had been having fun for the past few months. We have, James. We have.

I don't know what I would do if I lost you. But if it was my fault I think I would probably go crazy. It's not your fault, James. It will never be your fault.

I tried to save you, you know. Actually I didn't, please tell.

When I saw you falling, I tried to cast a charm that would cushion the impact. But still, here you are, in the hospital wing. I suppose that is my fault too. No, James. If I don't get control of my body again soon, I think I might go crazy.

But still, Lily, I need you to hold in there. Because… He is trailing off. Because why James? Other than the obvious reason that I really don't want to die at 17, what were you going to say? As if he is reading my mind, he speaks up again.

Because I love you, Lily. And I just need you to hang in there. I feel a drop of water hit my cheek. Is he crying?

"James?" I can speak! Granted my voice doesn't sound too great, and my mouth is very dry, but still. I can speak! I squint my eyes against the harsh light in the hospital wing, and slowly open them to see James Potter staring down at me, a joyous look on his face. I can move too!

"Lily?" he says gleefully, "Lily, are you alright?!"

"I didn't jump, James," I tell him hoarsely, suddenly remembering what he said earlier.

"Wha…?" He asks, clearly confused.

"I didn't jump, I slipped. And there is absolutely nothing you could do that could make me that unhappy. So don't you doubt yourself like that again," I tell him with a small smile on my face.

"You could hear…?" he asks, still stunned. I nod briefly.

"I love you too, James," Okay, now I surprised even myself with that one. We've only been dating for three months, and I haven't exactly told him that I love him before. However, I've never been surer about anything in my life.

A huge grin breaks onto his face, and he leans down to kiss me gently on my lips. And right before the mediwitch rushes into the room I can hear it; the soft gentle pitter patter of rain falling outside the window.


I hope the second part wasn't too confusing. Basically Lily was in a state of semi-consciousness, but she couldn't move yet. And the italics were stuff that James/ other people were saying, and the regular were here thoughts and whatever.

Yeah so anyway...you like? Tell me! REVIEW!!