Ello folks. Just a random idea that occurred to me yesterday, hope you enjoy!

I don't own WoW, blah blah blah, mmkay?


She stood there, towering over the centaur's corpse, cackling. She said something in Orcish, spat on it, then shifted her attention to us.

'Crap,' said Lenora. I blanched.

She smirked. Then she transformed into a human woman. A very piratey one. Our jaws dropped open, and she burst out laughing – a human laugh!

'You scared the shit out of us!' I said.

She wiped a tear from her eye and looked up at us with a grin that made my insides go weak. She was pretty. 'Fooled ya!' she said. She transformed back into a lady troll.

'The hell?' said Lenora.

It was a hot day in Durotar, and my sister and I had been "ganking lowbies" as the guild called it. Lowbies – the technical term for younglings starting their training. However our attention had been diverted by what we thought was a human on a horse from a distance to our short sighted eyes, and turned out to be a centaur that was far from being a lowbie. Just when we thought we would be popping up daisies, the young troll – who didn't look bad for a troll, and she was quite… ah… well endowed – had saved our asses. She sniggered at us.

'That was totally random,' said Lenora.

'Do you ever shut up?' I asked her.

'Only when I need air,' my sister shot back, and laughed. The troll raised both eyebrows and grinned. 'Who's she, anyway? Can she speak Common, or only those two words?'

'She had an accent,' I said. 'I think she imitated them or something.'

'How on earth is a rogue able to turn into a human? She is a rogue, right?'

I supposed so – she had leather armour, but not the sneaky black of the rogue. Then again, black wouldn't blend well in Durotar. 'She looked rather piratey,' I said. 'Maybe it was that fish? You know, that recipe they make out of the deviates?'

'Why'd she cancel the effect so soon?'

'Maybe she ate like only one scale or something.'

The troll said something in Orcish and laughed. I think she had said something along the lines of any particular reason why you're talking about me? or something, by the way she was so amused.

'Let's take her home,' said Lenora.

I looked at her incredulously. 'You have got to be joking.'

'Nope,' said Lenora. 'She's awfully pretty for a troll.'

'You're a woman.'


'You should not be saying stuff like that.'

'What's wrong with noticing how pretty someone looks or not?'

'She's a troll! We're not taking her home and you're not meant to be complimenting her looks!'

The troll said something. We ignored her.

'You know Mum won't care,' said Lenora.

That was true. If there was ever an insane crazy cat lady person in Azeroth, it was Mother. 'So? She might!'

'She probably has a name,' Lenora approached the troll who cocked her head and tightened her grip on the dagger. Lenora didn't miss it, stopping for a second before going in closer. 'Who are you?'

The troll cocked her head again.

'Me Lenora,' said Lenora, pointing at herself. 'Lenora. You…?' she pointed at the troll.

The troll said something in Orcish. Probably something like, What the fuck are you on about?

'Lenora,' Lenora pointed at herself. 'Alexander,' she pointed at me. 'Lenora… Alexander.'

'Kali,' the troll finally said. She pointed at herself. 'Kali.'

So our troll did have a name!

'Come home with us!' said Lenora. Kali merely raised an eyebrow. 'Come-home-with-us. You know, Alex, we should teach her Common.'

'She's not a God forsaken pet!'

Lenora giggled. 'So? She's so cute! And don't deny it!'

'She's a troll, Lenora.'

'So what? She's still so cute! Admit it, Alexander, you find the troll cute!'

Her tone had become so venomous I was frightened into saying, 'Yes, the troll is cute, can we go home now?'

'Ha ha, you think the troll's cute!'

'Oh, for heaven's sake,' I rolled my eyes.

'Come on Kali!' said Lenora. 'Come home with us.'

The troll gave her a look that said, You have got to be kidding me.

'C'mon!' Lenora walked a few paces away and beckoned to us. 'You need some feeding up!'

'If she actually follows you,' I said. 'I owe you a gold.'

She actually followed her.

'How about instead, you buy the next round of drinks when we go to an inn?' Lenora giggled. Kali, chattering under her breath in her native tongue, stuck close to the human girl. I rolled my eyes again and followed.

This was going to be interesting.