Hold On For Me
Summary: When you think that this is finally it, that there is no way you'll escape dead once again, is it possible that your little brother is strong enough reason to try? Hurt!Dean
AN: This is kinda... a mix up of few things in my latest stories.. It has flashbacks and a hurt Dean and desperate Sam. But anyway, the idea wouldn't leave me alone, and because I haven't written anything in a while, I thought I'd write it down for all of you to read. Hope you enjoy it, review and tell me if you did and if you didn't. :D
Disclaimer: No, I don't own Supernatural
Dean heard it, Sam yelling for him. But he couldn't answer, as much as he wanted to. For one time in his life his attention had completely left his little brother. For one time in his life his attention was fully on himself. He was bleeding, he was bleeding badly... Before Dean fell on the ground he heard two gunshots and a horrible scream that could not become from anything else but the thing that had made him bleed.
Dean groaned in protest as someone suddenly turned him around. That did NOT feel good.
"You... got it...?"
"Yeah, Dean, the wendigo is dead", came Sam's gentle answer. It was mixed with something... There was something in there that Dean couldn't understand... "We have to get to the car", Sam said. "Can you get up?"
"How bad does it look?" Dean asked.
"Does it look as bad as it feels?" Dean insisted, not letting Sam off the hook. "Cuz let me tell you, it hurts pretty bad."
Sam bit his lower lip. The wounds on his brother's stomach did look like they hurt. But they didn't look that deep... So why in the world were they bleeding so badly? "No, Dean. They don't look that bad, you'll make it." Sam didn't know did he say that to convince himself or Dean. "Now come on, we have to get out of here." Sam got a hold of Dean's arm and helped him up. Dean groaned again and took several deep breath. He didn't even try to hold himself up but instead let Sam carry most if his weight.
"Oh God..." Dean said suddenly, closing his eyes.
"I have to sit down..."
"Dean, we haven't walked more than two minutes!"
"And I have to sit down!" Dean yelled, pulling his arm free. Bad mistake. He hadn't even realized how weak he was before he noticed that his legs were betraying him. Just as he was gonna fall over Sam got a hold of him and lowered him against a tree.
"You okay?" A stupid question, Sam knew it as soon as it came from his mouth and Dean made very sure he thought so, too:
"Does it look like I'm okay, Sam? How many times have I ever let you help me walk?"
Okay, old guys spirit in an old house... A one big son of a BITCH! As Dean landed on the floor after falling from a hole that was on the floor now above him, he heard a loud crack and then a blinding pain went through his leg, making it's way through his whole body.
"I'm here, Sammy", Dean yelled back, hearing Sam's voice from somewhere above. Suddenly Sam's head appeared to the hole.
"How did you end up there?"
"I flew. How the hell do you think?" Dean said.
"Did the spirit mess up with your brain? I thought you had straight A's!! Of course I fell, you idiot!"
Sam had known that from the moment he had heard Dean's voice. But the relief that had washed over him when he saw Dean was okay and not bleeding all over barely alive had made his brain go numb. "You okay?"
Oh no... No 'uh', just a simple 'yes' would be just fine.
"I uh... I think I broke my leg..."
Well, Sam could handle that. "Hold on, I'll get down there."
A minute later Sam had found stairs. He knew John was looking for the spirit's bones right now but that didn't stop him from getting down as fast as he could. If Dean couldn't walk and if John wouldn't find the body in time, there was a chance that in a while Dean would be bleeding all over barely alive.
"Hey", Dean said when Sam reached him. "See you aren't as much into extreme sport as me", he tried to joke.
"Can you move at all?" Sam asked, kneeling down.
"I can move at all but I don't think I can walk", Dean admitted, seeing that there was no point in trying to distrackt Sam.
"Well, we gotta get out of here. The spirit might come back any minute", Sam said.
Dean knew Sam was right, he just didn't know could his pride take it. He sighed, trying to get up and immediately regretting it. The pain shot through his body again, so intense it made him want to vomit. Sam saw all the color leave his brother's face as his breath became uneven and fast.
"Come on, let me help you", Sam said, putting Dean's right arm over his shoulder. He was glad of the fact that getting up would be the hardest part. He knew that Dean was having hard time not to scream and the amount of pain he was in must had been horrible. He was also glad that he had grown longer than Dean. That fact made this job a little easier.
"God I hope this will never happen again..." Dean muttered. Sam didn't know did he mean the fact that he was helping him walk or that his leg was broken. Well, when you thought of it, Dean meant both. "Oh, Christ..."
Yeah, that described the situation pretty great. The only way up was, surprise, surprise, the stairs. "Will you be okay?" Sam asked, worried about how pale Dean was.
"I'll be fine. Let's go."
It wasn't an easy task. It required meny convincing and encouraging words from Sam and Dean tried to listen to them as much as he could. He would never admit it but it was probably the fact that Sam kept talking to him, telling he they would make it and that soon he could rest that made him continue instead of falling down.
"We can get going again", Dean said, after couple of minutes rest.
"You sure?" Sam asked.
"Yeah... Yeah, I'm sure. Let's go. With Sam's help, Dean got up and they continued their journey out of the forest.
"It'll be okay..." "We will make it..." "...nice warm bed, shower and food..." "It'll be all over soon, don't worry..." That kind of words Sam kept repeating to Dean, hoping that it offered his brother some kind of comfort.
Dean knew it would all be over soon. How, that was another question. There were two ways out of this situation and it didn't help that Dean and the reaper called each other with the first name.
Sam felt how Dean's strenght was slowly fading as the weight he was carrying grew. He knew Dean was bleeding very badly and he knew that they were making their way out of the forest way too slowly. He didn't like the color of Dean's skin and he didn't like how quiet he was. Dean that was okay would complain, groan and whine about his current situation, but Dean that was not okay just stayed quiet and let Sam help him. Just like the Dean Sam was helping right now.
"It'll be okay, Dean", Sam said again.
"Yeah", was Dean's quiet reply.
"I mean it, Dean. I will get you out of here", Sam convinced.
"Of course you will, Sammy."
Six year old Sam had just learn how to wrap a hand or leg or something that was bleeding. But he could never have guessed how soon he would have to use his new skill. Dean was making him breakfast one sunny morning and put an empty box of Lucky Charms to the trash when he suddenly gasped in pain.
"What?" Sam asked immediately.
"Nothing, just keep eating", Dean said. How could he had forgotten his Dad had broke a beer bottle last night? Because of that little memory lost he now had a long, bleeding wound in his hand.
"Dean, you're bleeding", Sam said, still sitting on the table. His eyes were fixed in Dean's hand.
"It's okay, Sa... Where are you going?" Sam had left the table, leaving his half eaten Lucky Charms go all soft in the milk, and had gone to the bathroom. Ten seconds later he came back with the first aid kit. "Sammy, I don't need anything..."
"Be quiet, I am concentrating", Sam said, stucking his tongue out as he put the bandage over Dean's arm and cut a peace. Then, just as his father had showed him, he wrapped Dean's arm, so gently and carefully only six year old's concentration was enough for it. "You're done", Sam announced.
"Thanks, Sammy", Dean said, ruffling Sam's hair.
"Did I do good?" Sam asked.
"You did perfect, Sammy."
"You okay?" It must have been the tenth time Sam asked it over the last five minutes but he just had to know.
"Hanging in there..." Dean answered. How tightly, that Dean didn't know. He felt the warm blood come out of his wounds and his shirt was all read and soaking. This could not end up good... "Sam...?"
"I have to stop..."
"Dean, we can't! It's not long anymore, please, let's just keep going, okay?"
"Sammy, I can't..."
"Yes, you can."
"Sammy... This is really starting to hurt..."
"I know, Dean. You just have to hold on. Can you do that? Can you do that much for me, Dean. Please?"
Sam was not playing fair. He knew Dean could deny Sam nothing. ...For me was just low! But the amount of pain Dean was in and the bloodloss did not let Dean walk another step, not even with Sam helping him. His legs gave up under him, making him and Sam both fall on the ground.
"Dean?" No reply. "Dean, say something!"
"I can't, Sammy... I'm sorry, I can't..." Dean mumbled. Sam took a shaky breath and helped Dean sit up. His painfilled eyes met Sam's desperate ones, creating some kind of bridge between the brothers. Through that bridge the other could feel exactly what his brother was going through.
"We're not far from the car anymore, Dean", Sam said gently. "Then we're gonna go to a hospital where you can rest and then check out the hot nurses. Just a little longer, okay?"
"You can't leave me here alone, can you?" Sam said, knowing his stragedy was dirty. "You said you would save me. How can you do that if you're dead, huh?"
Dean just looked at Sam, not believing that he had played that card. That was so not fair!!
"So now you believe me when I say that I will save you?"
"I've never doubted it..."
"I've never doubted it! I've doubted can I hold on long enough for you to find a way to do it! But I believe you can, okay? I do. But you can't do it if you're not here, so you have to believe me now when I say that I can save you. And you can hold on long enough, I know you can. You're Dean Winchester, you're the strongest person I have ever known or ever will. You're my big brother. Just a little longer, Dean. Just a little longer."
Dean swallowed, trying to keep the tears from falling. Then he nodded.
"Okay, little brother."
Sam hadn't seen Dean in three days. Three days Dean had been in the hospital only a mile from the motel they were staying at but John didn't let Sam go see Dean. Something about it being bad for Dean. How could Sam be bad for Dean? Had Sam done something bad...? Sam knew that the hunt John and Dean had gone to had been a difficult one and Dean had been hurt when they came back but why was Sam bad for him?
John had fallen asleep in an armchair, tired of the last three days he had spent in the hospital. Sam knew pastor Jim was there now. And John would never notice. Sam knew the way to the hospital and he wanted to see Dean so bad. John wouldn't get mad, surely he would understand...
Quietly, Sam made his was out of the room. When he was sure John wouldn't come after him, he started to walk faster. It took him twenty minutes to get to the hospital. It was big white building and Sam didn't like the idea of Dean being in there.
A kind looking nurse looked Sam over the desk. First she was surprised by a nine year old that had appeared in front of her but then she smiled. "Hey there. Can I help you? Are you lost?"
"Kinda... I'm looking for my brother", Sam said.
"Are your parents with him?"
"He's with me", came a familiar voice behind Sam. Sam turned around to see pastor Jim and smiled a little. Pastor Jim wouldn't get mad, right? "Come on, Sammy. Let's go see your brother." Sam's smile grew. He waved to the nurse and went after pastor Jim. They didn't say anything on the way to Dean's room. When they reached it, pastor Jim stopped Sam. "Your brother has been in a deep sleep over the last three days. He might look a little weird when you go in and there'll be a lot of machines but he's still Dean. Those machines are helping him. Okay?"
"Okay..." Sam said, a little confused. "When will he wake up?"
"I don't know, Sam", Jim said truthfully.
"But he will, right?"
"I don't know..."
Tears came into Sam's eyes and he went pass pastor Jim, opening the door to Dean's room. He didn't care about the machines or the tubes going into Dean's body, he went straight to his brother's bedside.
"Dean? Jim says he doesn't know will you wake up... Why? Dean, I don't understand... Everyone wakes up. First you sleep, then you wake up, right? I know you're hurt but you have to wake up. You can't sleep forever..."
Sam understood very well that Dean could. He shouldn't have to, but he did. It scared him, made him want to break something and yell at someone. But Sam put all that aside, kicked off his shoes and climbed into the bed next to Dean. The bed was big, he fit in quite comfortably. He put his head on Dean's chest and closed his eyes.
"I love you, Dean", he whispered. Everytime Dean said those words to Sam it made him feel better, maybe it would do the same to Dean...
"...you too, Sammy..."
By the time they had came to the hospital, Dean was no longer concious. He was way too weak and he had lost way too much blood to be. Sam had explained the wounds by saying that they were made by bear while they had been hiking. And even if the marks didn't look very much like wounds a bear would make, what else could the doctor say they were?
Sam looked at the clock. He had sat in the waiting room for two hours now. He guessed the wounds had made more damage than he was able to see. But they could fix it. And if they couldn't, Dean would fix it himself. That was something Sam counted on.
Sam stood up. A male doctor in his mid forties came to him and motioned him to sit back down. Sam didn't obey. "How is he?"
"He had lost a lot of blood..." Sam took in a sharp breath. "...and he stopped breathing once during the operation. But let me tell you, your brother seems to be a stubborn guy. He made it through and I would say he's gonna make a full recovery."
Sam sighed in relief and put a hand on his face. This was too much to his nerves. "Can I see him?"
"Of course. Follow me."
The doctor lead Sam to Dean's hospital room. Sam noticed that it was something that had happened a few times too often. When they came to the room the doctor said he would come to check on Dean in an hour and left Sam alone.
"Hey. He said you're stubborn. Finally that is a good thing", Sam said as he sat down. "You scared me, Dean. Can you please stop doing this? Do you like hospitals or something? Why do we end up in here over and over again?"
"Hot nurses, little brother. Hot nurses." Sam couldn't help but laugh when Dean opened his eyes. "And the beds are comfortable."
"Right. You okay?"
"As okay as I can be. Tired..."
"You should get some rest. The doctor said you're gonna be fine."
"Of course I'm gonna be fine! When did you ever doubt that?" Dean asked as he fell back in sleep. Sam smiled a little, taking Dean's hand to his own.
AN: Please, let me know what you think!! It would make me so happy!!
(Sorry for the mistakes, I made this in a hurry...)