Disclaimer: I do not own the Tv show House, or its characters, so don't ask me for money, I make nothing.
Summary: Takes place shortly after "All In". Allison gets sick, House takes care of her to get out of clinic duty, craziness accumulates! Pairings House/Cameron. Definitely a MATURE fic, so if you're a young person please don't read, but if you choose to read anyway, don't say I didn't warn you.
Chapter One: You've Been Bugged
Dr. House limped his usual stride down the hall to the Diagnostics Department. He could see his three little ducklings quacking around the proverbial water cooler; i.e. Cameron's morning pot of coffee. With an over dramatic sweep of his arms, House entered the glass cage.
Pausing momentarily, House looked from glass wall to glass wall and wondered aloud, "Ever stop and wonder if we really i are i lost souls swimming in a fish bowl?" At the blank look of his three colleagues he waved off his remark. "So, what have we got today?" He asked as he grabbed his red mug and began drinking out of it, knowing that Cameron had already filled it.
"Nothing." Foreman looked grumpy, arms crossed over his chest, a deep crease on his brow, "We"
"Shh!" House shushed him as his pager went off. He glanced at it, eyes narrowing. "Cuddy's coming!" He hobbled into his office, locking himself in and drawing the blinds.
"Does he have Wilson paging him whenever Cuddy looks like she might be heading towards diagnostics?" Chase gaped in disbelief. However, to no one's surprise, Cuddy came into the department looking royally pissed off.
"Where is House!?" Cuddy growled low in her throat, a menacing gleam flashing through her eyes that said clear as day that House may be missing a testicle after she finally got her hands on him.
The three colleagues looked from one another, eyes wide and maybe a little fearful, and then glanced at House's office door.
"Figures." Cuddy mumbled under her breath as she practically stomped to the door to give it an experimental tug. When it resisted, Cuddy lost her cool and began banging on the door. "HOUSE!" She shrieked. "You owe me double clinic duty after that stunt you pulled yesterday"
"Which stunt is she talking about?" Chase's brow furrowed.
"Don't ask." Cameron muttered, grabbing her coffee and sitting at the brainstorming table to get started on House's charts.
Foreman choked on a laugh as to not encourage the wrath of the head of the hospital. "He broke into the records office on the OBGYN department to win a bet"
"Yes he did, and now he's avoiding clinic duty." Cuddy growled, "HOUSE!" She went back to banging on his door. "Get your crippled ass out here!" She screamed.
"He's not coming out. General Hospital starts in three minutes." Cameron announced over the chart she was working on.
Cuddy groaned in annoyance, she had an unholy amount of paper work to finish and she knew Cameron was right. "I'll be back in an hour, if he's still not in the clinic, I'll triple his time." She stormed out.
"Won't matter if you schedule him ten times the amount if he doesn't even show up for what he's suppose to." Cameron muttered, finishing the chart and standing up.
"Where are you going?" Foreman asked as she walked towards the door.
"Some of us i don't i avoid clinic like the bubonic plague." She sighed.
Foreman and Chase watched her walk down the hall, "Maybe if it was the bubonic plague House would be interested in showing up in the clinic." Chase chuckled to himself.
"Did Cameron look exhausted to you?" Foreman asked his colleague.
"Yeah, but it's Cameron." Chase shrugged.
Foreman snorted, "Probably up all night writing poetry like i Oh, Dr. House, how do I love thee? They cane is so long and hair so grayi"
"Are you done, or should I continue to listen to you talk about my icanei?" House was leaning in the door jam of his office, "Want to touch it?" He extended his cane to Foreman, who recoiled and caused House to chuckle on the inside. With a shrug House walked to the door.
"Where are you going?" Chase asked.
"WHy didn't you go there before Cuddy reamed you?" Foreman called after him.
House ducked his head back in. "Just to piss her off," as he began walking out the door again he muttered to himself, "and because I didn't know General Hospital was going to be a rerun." As he entered the clinic, House noted Dr. Cameron running around, though not with her usual annoying chipperness. Worming his hand into his coat pocket, he found his pill bottle and made his way to his female subordinate.
"Did you run over a cat on your way to work?" House asked, leaning against the nurse's station.
"What? Why?" Cameron was taken aback by the odd question.
"You're not your usual agitating self. Your sweetness is usually like nails on a chalk board." House replied, flicking off his cap on the bottle of Vicodin. The white top flew into the air and House observed that Cameron did not watch its movement, but only responded when it fell to the ground. Cameron bent over to pick up the cap and as she stood up strait once more, she stumbled.
House groaned and set his pills on the counter quickly, catching his fainting co-worker and supporting her extra weight by leaning against the reception desk.
"Get me a wheelchair." House grunted to a passing nurse.
As the nurse placed Dr. Cameron in the wheel chair, she began to awaken. Immediately House assaulted her eyes with a blinding beam of light, checked her pulse, listened to her heart and hijacked a passing nurse who was carrying a sphygmomanometer so he could check her blood pressure.
Cuddy was passing by and saw her unruly diagnostician hovering over Dr. Cameron rather than attending to the patients in the waiting room. "House," she said, a note of agitation pitching into her voice, "you're suppose to be examining patients, not other doctors." She reminded him in annoyance.
House rolled his eyes, "Dr. Cuddy, Dr. Cameron has just experienced an unexplained fainting spell"
"But... The patients!" Cuddy nearly whined, knowing she was just about to excuse him from his clinic duty once again.
Narrowing his eyes, House straitened up and limped to the waiting room to address the congregation of waiting patients, "Is anyone currently fainting, projectile vomiting or defecating in here?" House called out. No one responded more than to look at one another. Turning back to Cuddy, House grinned at her, "Dr. Cameron is my current priority." And with that wheeled Cameron towards the elevator and up to diagnostics.
Once in the elevator, Cameron sighed, "You don't have to diagnose me"
"Of course I don't, but it gives me an excuse to get out of the clinic today." House answered nonchalantly. "Your blood sugar is low." He smirked at her puzzled look. "You're wearing the same clothes as yesterday, no empty food wrappers in the garbage in our office and decreased response time." He rattled off.
"Ah, so this is a ploy to get you out of work." Cameron lulled her head back. "So what? You're going to put me in a gown, draw blood and test for things I don't have all day long"
"No, as a thank you for getting me out of the clinic I'm taking you out to lunch, and then taking you home for the rest of the day." House explained. "We're going to diagnostics to get your stuff"
As House wheeled his only female colleague into the office, Foreman and Chase stood immediately.
"What happened?" Chase sank down to check her pupil dilations, as Foreman took her pulse. "Nothing a non-hospital food lunch and a nap won't fix." House snarked. "But in the event she keels over, I'll monitor her condition"
Chase stood up, shaking his head. "You'll go to any lengths to avoid clinic won't you"
"Well I didn't inject her with insulin, so maybe ishe'lli go to any lengths to get me out of the clinic." House tossed her purse into her lap and draped Cameron's coat over her shoulders.
"Why don't you give her some food and let us all get on with our lives? You said it yourself, low blood sugar." Foreman reasoned.
"Well ithati wouldn't get me out of the clinic, would it?" House cocked an eyebrow.
"I think Cuddy will be pissed when she finds out it was low blood sugar." Foreman pointed out.
"She also hasn't slept in oh... Forty-eight hours? Do you think it's safe for her to drive when she's already experienced one fainting spell?" "I'm right here, you know?" Cameron pointed out.
"Yes," House pushed her towards the door with a single shove, "and now you're over there." He grabbed his coat and hat and limped back to Cameron. "Page me when someone starts dying"
Foreman and Chase sighed.
//// "Okay, what do you want to eat? I can make take-out Chinese, take-out Italian"
"I'm not hungry." Cameron curled onto the couch, pulling an afghan over her head.
"There's a note, "Allison, took Kane out at two... Who's Kane?" He needn't have asked because a white and red German Shepherd was staring at him from the other side of the kitchen counter. "What are you looking at?" House noted on a closer observation of the dog that it was a female, "And what kind of name is 'Kane' for a female?" House grunted going to Cameron's fridge and pulling out a Power Aid. "Drink this." He handed Cameron the drink. "If you're not going to eat, at least have that"
"Candy-cane." Cameron muttered, the dog trotted over and licked her face in a slopping I'm-Glad-You're-Back kiss.
"Red and white like a candy cane, Candy was too girly so you call her Kane witha K so no one thinks she's crippled?" House pieced together in amusement.
"First half correct second half not. I call her Kane 'cause she reminds me of you." She yawned, turning her face into the side of the couch.
"I wouldn't lick your face"
"No, but she barks orders at me and I can tell what she wants by how she glares at me." Cameron's eyes hooded, sleep coming fast.
"What do I want then?" House asked softly to coax her into sleep.
She yawned again and murmured something that was too incoherent and soft to interpret. House sighed and stood up, limping around her apartment, Kane following his every move. First, House looked at her DVD collection, seeing how many of her movies he'd seen, becoming slightly disarmed that they were in alphabetical order. Next her bookshelf, strewn with Medical books, self-help books, and an eclectic collaboration of fiction.
Next, House checked out her bathroom, Kane still following him with a suspicious eye. Tampons, a pharmacy of vitamins and painkillers, deodorant, liquid body wash, Head and Shoulders shampoo and conditioner. A nearby closet revealed fresh towels and bed linens, all folded, extra toothpaste and toilet paper.
As House walked towards a closed room, Kane growled deep in her throat in warning. "Ah, the bedroom." The dog's furs rose between her shoulder blade. "Okay, I'll leave it alone, but only because I don't feel like losing my trachea." He rolled his eyes.
Walking back to the living room, he found Cameron still fast asleep on the couch, Kane curled up on the floor next to her, lifting her head every once and a while to lick the palm of her owner's dangling hand.
Grabbing "Animal Farm" off of the bookshelf, House made himself comfy on the adjoining sofa and began to read. Around the end of chapter nine, coming towards the final chapter, Cameron began to stir. House watched her awaken with interest. Her face was flushed and perspiration was forming on her forehead.
Sighing, House stood up and grabbed a bowl of river stones off her coffee table and tossed the contents on the floor. Cameron watched as he limped over and was grateful when she vomited into the bowl he held rather than on her floor.
"Thanks." She grunted, wincing as he set the bowl of vomit on her table.
"Get up. You're getting a fever, you need to be in bed." He told her, offering a hand as he braced himself with his cane.
Cameron took the offered hand and walked solemnly to the bathroom to brush her teeth. House heard her vomit again and then heard the faucet as she brushed her teeth. The woman looked miserable as she slowly walked to her room.
Grabbing the thermometer from Cameron's medicine cabinet, House went into her room and took her temperature. 101.2¡. Swiping her stethoscope from her lab coat pocket, he listened to her heartbeat as Kane eyed him apprehensively from her spot at the end of the bed.
"Congratulation, you have the flu." House announced, pulling the stethoscope from his ears. "I recommend bedrest, lots of fluids and General Hospital reruns"
Cameron stared off at the wall as House left her room. She heard a door slam and she sighed. "Finally got him here, Kane, and I'm too sick to try anything." She groaned.
Surprise was written all over Allison Cameron's face when House reappeared with an empty glass in his hand and a bottle of water in his coat pocket. He set the glass on her night stand, filled it with water, plunked a straw in it and fished around his other pocket.
"Vitamin C, and anti-microbials." He told her as he handed her a few pills. House pulled a bag of salteen crackers out of his pocket and handed it to her.
Cameron felt guilty as she saw House hobble out of the room, only to return with a desk chair, which fortunately had wheels, stacked with books and magazines.
"I'm sorry." She mumbled as he plopped the reading material on her night stand, sat down, and propped his feet upon her bed.
"Why?" House flipped back to where he'd left off in "Animal Farm.
"I know it's not easy to move stuff around my apartment." She said softly, drifting back towards sleep. "Thank you"
House brushed off her apology and gratitude and went about reading. Cameron drifted back to sleep and House finished another two books, checking her temperature every half hour. When she awoke again she was at a solid 100¡, ate a few crackers, went to the bathroom, threw up said crackers, took more of her immune system cocktail, water, and fell back asleep.
Nibbling on the crackers he'd brought her, House continued reading 1984, feeling like he was on a George Orwell kick. He checked her temperature again and she was down to 99.5¡. He was grateful that her body already seemed to have the necessary antibodies to beat the flu out quickly. She probably only caught it because of sleep deprivation and lack of nutrients. She'd be ihungryi when she woke up next time. She would also be pissed off if he didn't do something about the bowl he'd let her throw up in. Standing up he went to throw it out, she could buy a new one for her river stones.
Kane jumped off the bed when House came back into the room and scratched at the bedroom door he'd just closed, signaling she needed to go out.
"I can't walk you." House grunted sitting down once more. "I could install a catheter though." He grinned darkly.
Kane whimpered, her tail curling between her legs. House laughed.
"Threatening my dog? Now that's ilowi." Allison sighed, sitting up. HOuse took her temperature and she was at 99.1.
"How are you feeling?" He asked standing up and throwing his magazine on the table.
"Better, but I'm starving!" She lamented.
"Well let's walk that beast of yours and go out for some food." House began limping towards the door.
"Really?" "Really what?" House looked at her.
Cameron flushed. "You're sticking around?" She asked.
House shrugged. "Figured I should at least get a free dinner out of this." Cameron laughed. "Besides, we came here in your car, and I still don't trust you to drive until you've eaten"
"Fair." She agreed getting out of bed.
After Kane was walked, the two of them went to a Chinese restaurant that was halfway between their homes.
House watched his only female subordinate eat her chicken friend rice, barely touching his own rice noodles. Ever since the previous week, when he'd seen her in that sleeveless red gown he couldn't look at her without feeling compelled to stare. That, or throw her against a wall and kiss the medical terminology out of her.
That would take a lot of kissing. He thought menacingly. Suddenly he felt hot, uncharacteristically so, and it wasn't hot and bothered hot, it was I'm-Gonna-Pass-Out hot!
"House?" Cameron noted his flushing face. "Are you okay?" She asked, reaching across the small table and pressing the back of her hand to his forehead.
Her hand felt cold. His head felt hot.
"Oh, no! I think I bugged you!"
A/N- Hope you enjoyed, it's been a long time since I've written so review, make me feel all gooey inside :D. P.S. This chapter is brought to you by the song "Signs" by Five Man Electrical Band, which I listened to almost the entire time I was typing this...Wow, I'm a loser :D.