Disclaimer: I do not own Soul Calibur.

(A.N: Okay I know almost nothing about this fandom, so apologies there. This idea came to me when I saw that Cassandra's name was originally mistranslated as 'Kathandra.' From that you can probably tell this is a crackfic, however I will warn you now: CONTAINS SEVERE OOC-CRACKFICCIENESS!!! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED

The Problem with Dubs
By Silver Sailor Ganymede

Cassandra had decided that she officially hated whoever had come up with the idea to do an English language re-make of Soul Calibur. She glared and the script in her hand, wishing it would just spontaneously combust, then threw the cursed thing on the table in front of her.

"I HATE DUBS!" she screamed.

Sophitia came into the room, a confused look on her face, "Anything wrong, Cassandra?"

Cassandra glowered at her sister, "Have you seen the English-language script?!"

Sophitia shot her a confused look then realisation dawned on her. "Oh, that! I don't know why you're so worked up about it."

"Don't know why I'm so worked up about it?!" Cassandra screeched. "The dubbers got my name wrong! MY NAME! Don't tease me about it, I have every right to be annoyed!"

"Alright then, Kathandra, I won't tease you about it any more," Sophitia said, an evil smirk on her face.

"Sophitia it isn't funny!" Cassandra whined.

Silence, then…

"…Yes it is..."

"What would you be acting like if it was your name they'd got wrong?" Cassandra snapped.

"Well at least the enemies won't be able to catch you if they get your name wrong," Sophitia shrugged.

Cassandra was about to say something else when the door burst open and an enraged looking Taki burst into the room.

"Have you seen the script?!" Taki yelled.

"What about it?"

"They... they got my name right!" The ninja sounded horrified by this fact.

"You sound pissed off..." Cassandra was confused.

"I AM! I'm a NINJA! I'm supposed to be enigmatic and secretive and... stuff like that!"

"Well if you're such a stealthy ninja, how about not busting up our door next time, hmm?" Sophitia said. "I'm getting sick of having to pay for new ones."

Cassandra meanwhile looked like she was going to tear up her script.


"Finally something everyone agrees on," Taki replied.