A Moment In Time ~ Wufei
This is an outrage! It's . . . it's . . . Injustice!
The way Trowa watches Maxwell is nerve wracking. I know how he feels; I don't have to be told. He loves that braided idiot and wants to have him for his own, but he knows he can't. Sometimes I think I should break the couple up, throw aside my own feelings, just so he can be happy. But that would be dishonorable.
How can he be so infatuated with that boy! How can he want him so? Look at the way he stares; he wants him so badly. Why do people always want what they can't have? I'm right here! Take me! But I guess I'm not good enough.
I suppose I would be better off if I told him how I felt. Instead of letting everyone think I care for no one or only for Nataku, maybe I should say what's in my heart. But what good would that do? I wouldn't know what to say. I'm not even sure how these feelings started.
No, wait. I know.
After my first fight with Treize, which I lost miserably, he was the one who was there for me. He took me in and comforted me in his own quiet way. He handed me a cup of coffee, and our fingers lightly brushed; it sent shivers up my spine and something sparked in my heart. And this emotion has only grown stronger since then. After continuously witnessing his strength and his determination, the feeling has grown.
Who am I to get upset at him wanting someone he can't have? I'm in the exact same position. And like him, I've also taken to watching. Without anyone noticing, I watch Trowa watch Duo. Watch him memorize every detail of the American pilot's face (just as I have his own face memorized), and watch him study every movement the other makes (that's right, I've studied his movements too).
After a pause to take a drink, Maxwell waves at him. That flirt. Why does he need to have Trowa's heart as well as Yuy's? Selfish. And only he could get a response from the emerald-eyed beauty, even if it's such a small wave back. Here I am prancing around half naked and I don't get so much as a glance! Where's the justice!? He seems to have him under a spell . . .
But I shouldn't be mad at Duo. It's not his fault, really. He can't help being the way he is. And I can't help being incredibly jealous of him and the way he's captivated Trowa.
Then Trowa glances at the Winner boy. My other rival. I smirk to myself at that thought. The little blond is so obvious in his advances; does he not realize that he doesn't stand a chance? How can he not see where Trowa's gaze constantly rests? He doesn't see because he doesn't want to, that's how. Still, he's lucky. I wish I could be so open about my feelings; it hurts to hold everything in. Even though I know it wouldn't do any good, it'd still be nice to be so honest and sincere. Quatre's honesty is what makes him so pure. I admire and envy that.
What's this? He's looking at me now. Well, that's better. And I wonder what he thinks of me. Everyone sees me as the loner, I'm sure he does too. So I like to keep to myself; I have my reasons for that. It's better than following someone around like a dog (like that stupid female stalking Yuy). I'd rather not get close to anyone, then I don't have to worry about getting hurt again.
But I do hurt, and it's because I'm not close to someone. A certain someone. I don't want to be alone, but it's better this way. Right?
I don't want to be alone anymore.
What can I do!? I hate feeling hopeless. His analysis of everyone didn't stay on me for very long. Guess he missed the sight of Maxwell. Blondie thinks offering him tea will do any good. Ha! I knew he would refuse. I can feel the strength and speed of my workout increase. I want to yell and scream; that would be ridiculous. I feel like a child begging for attention. I am a man! I will not snivel to get affection! I don't need it! I-! I . . .
I'm tired of being the Solitary Dragon.