Chapter 8: Say It
"Something wrong? Are you in pain?" Kimber went for the only plausible explanation.
"No...it's just...this moment is simply too important. I don't want to mess it up. Do you think I'm merely after sex? That I'll just use you for that and leave? Is that it? Because I'm not. I don't want your body if that's the only thing you gonna give me. I want you to be clear on this. This fatal attraction we have for each other is not what my love for you consists of," he touched her cheek lovingly.
Kimber was looking at him more than confused. Christian doesn't stop sex if it's offered to him on a silver platter, "what are you saying?"
"You would have had sex with me while knowing I wouldn't join your church. Why?"
"Cause I panicked when you got shot all right? If I would've lost you I dunno what I would've done. I love you, you know that."
"You're letting other people rule your life. You're letting the ones from the church tell you what to do. You're letting them ruin your happiness. Love is forgiveness Kimber, it's not a matter of how many times each one of us made a mistake. What things have I done that you can't forgive? Which one? I need to know so I can do something about it."
"First of all in Scientology nobody's asked to accept anything as belief. What's true for you's what you found to be true. And last time I checked you were still an arsehole."
"And as a scientologist you're meant to help me not be an asshole."
"What if I take longer till you convince me it's a good thing? I won't jump and go to your services, but I won't say it's nonsense. And we'll see where time takes us. Is that not all right with their highnesses?"
"You're not serious about this."
"No, I'm not at the moment, but who says you can't convince me in several months time? If you work on me, day by day, night by night, living together as man and wife?"
"There's nothing in the world I want more than to marry you. But I can't."
"I don't understand."
"Not till my divorce papers come through. If you think you gonna change, if we help each other change, be better persons."
"Don't you think I'd do that for you? Now tell me. Where was it you got married with Matt so quickly?"