Disclaimer: I don't own Scrubs, it's character's or ANYTHING really. Boo!
Notes: This is my first Scrubs fic ever though I have been a fan of Scrubs forever and I have finally decided to try and write something myself. I didn't have a beta for this, I don't have any beta readers and my first language isn't even english, so I apologize for any mistakes. Feedback, please! JD's thoughts are in italics throughout the chapter.
He wasn't sure what started those thoughts. Maybe it was that small argument he had with Elliot during the weekend. Only a few things made him as angry as Elliot did when she tried to lecture him regarding his romantic life. He knew his relationships never lasted, that was true, but he was not the problem. Was he? At a point Elliot had suggested maybe he was playing for the wrong team. Turk was the first person that came to his mind when Elliot implied maybe he didn't need a woman, but he quickly shook his head at the thought.
He didn't have the chance to talk to Turk about it, and he didn't want to freak him out anyway. Perhaps he should have given Turk more credit though, after all, he was his best friend. Carla would probably agree with Elliot, or even worse, she would try to lecture him too. He could picture her telling him why his relationships never worked, pointing out everything he has done wrong and how women like to be treated. He wasn't stupid, perhaps he wasn't meant to be in a relationship and that was it.
When he walked into the on-call room, he was hoping to find someone to talk to, even Todd. That's how desperate he was for an opinion, but the only person he found was Dr. Cox.
You can't tell him, he'll make fun of you forever! Then again, how bad could it be? You know he cares about you, he only pretends he doesn't. He's probably the only person who will give you an honest answer, he won't care if he hurts your feelings or not. But what if he does hurt your feelings? Oh just shut up and go ask him!
"Dr. Cox, can I have a word with you?" He took a step closer to the older doctor who looked a bit too busy as he stood in front of the TV watching the news, quickly turning it off and trying to leave the room before JD could start talking. "It's personal, but--"
"Listen, Paris, I know you were not able to find that yellow dress you have been looking for and you have not been able to highlight your hair, but your girl issues are definitely not something I usually think of, which is why I would be oh-so-very grateful if you didn't bring them up. We are here to help people, once you are out of this place you can get that manicure you have been looking forward to all week, but while you are working pluh-ease don't waste my time with your senseless talks and your personal problems. I'm not sure if you ever got the memo, but in case you didn't, let me just tell you that I do not care about your problems and I absolutely don't care about you so why don't you just leave your skirt in the locker room, get to work, and you can pick it up on your way out right before you go on your girl's night out. How does that sound?" Dr. Cox ended his rant with a huge smile, he swiftly spun on his heel and started making his way out of the on-call room.
"You know what? I think you do care. Hell, you love me!" JD was able to blurt out before Perry left the room.
The older man stopped and turned around to look at JD, this time he moved slowly, possibly trying to look menacing. He slammed the door shut and gave a step closer to the younger man. "What was that, Tallulah?"
"I think you do care," JD paused and looked away before finishing the sentence "and love me."
Dr. Cox stared at him and scowled, his arms folded in front of his chest. "What, in God's name, is that supposed to mean?"
OK, so just tell him. It's not like he's going to kill you. JD opened his mouth to say something but soon regretted it, Dr. Cox had a strange look on his face. He was angry, but he seemed more amused as his expression changed from a frown to raised eyebrows in question. JD knew that couldn't be a good sign. Everyone dies anyway so the quicker the better. Say it!
"Come on, you do care. I think you do love me, and even when you try and play tough guy all the time, you aren't that bad inside. Deep inside. Waaay deep inside." JD swallowed hard. "Doesn't it tire you out, to pretend to be someone you are not just to gain respect? I think people would still respect you even if you weren't such an asshole."
"Newbie, is it just me or you are having very strong death wishes this morning?"
JD breathed out, trying to gather some strength before stepping closer to the other man and reaching to press his lips against Perry's. He felt a rush of adrenaline through his body, having no idea as of what to expect from Cox. What the hell was he doing anyway? Did he really need to go that far to prove his point? Did Elliot really get that badly inside his head? Alright so maybe he did have to go that far to prove his point, and maybe Elliot was right about him all along, but that didn't mean he was ready to whatever came out from his actions. Most of all, he didn't think it would feel that good to press his lips against his mentor's and that single action quickly blocked any other thoughts from his brain.
Dr. Cox didn't kiss him back, but he didn't pull away either. It was just a pecking kiss, neither parted their lips, it was just something harmless. JD slowly pulled away and met the older man's gaze. Perry was frowning, but he still didn't move, he didn't even make a sound and it was at that moment that JD realized he had a chance and he shouldn't waste it. For a moment he gave Dr. Cox the chance to pull away if he wanted to before getting ready to kiss him again. Surprisingly, the other man pulled JD closer by grabbing the collar of his scrubs, their faces only inches apart for a moment before their lips touched lightly. It was a tentative touch at first. JD moved his hands up to the back of Perry's head, pulling him closer and slightly parting his own lips. Perry's hands slipped around the younger man's waist to press against his back. The kiss became deeper and JD let his eyelids fall closed as Perry's tongue licked over his lips. JD opened his mouth further and Perry's tongue plunged inside, JD's own tongue reached out, licking the other experimentally, letting it roam in the other man's mouth, tasting his tongue, his teeth, his cheeks, eager to explore. JD felt himself harden when Dr. Cox pulled away just before delving again, breaking the kiss until they had to catch a breath.
Perry's forehead rested against JD's, their faces so close to each other he actually thought it could be possible to count each one of Perry's eyelashes from that distance. JD felt warm and safe in the man's arms, and for a moment he couldn't remember the point he was trying to make before he found himself kissing his mentor. JD smiled at the thought, it really didn't matter anymore. He placed a quick and gentle kiss on Perry's lips, which the other doctor returned in the same way.
"Are we done here?"
JD felt his heart sink into the pit of his stomach. "Yeah," he replied almost in a whisper.
"Go to work, Newbie." Dr. Cox finally walked out of the room, swinging the door open and not looking back once.
JD just sighed and dropped himself onto the couch. He was confused before, but this made things even worse. He ran a hand through his hair and sat there for a few minutes before finally heading out to do his job.