Ninjas of Konoha

Still don't own Naruto...what am I doing wrong?

Those Leaf-nin. What will they get up to next?

Chapter 1

Shiranui Genma silently closed the bedroom window behind him, leaving his latest conquest still sleeping. 'Not a bad night' he thought as he began to make his way across the rooftops to his own apartment on the other side of Konoha. 'Maybe I'll even see that one again.'

It was still very early when Genma reached the streets near the Academy. The only people generally up at this hour were shinobi leaving on or returning from missions, food stalls opening up for the breakfast trade, and a few civilians on their way to work. A couple of people waved as he passed but Genma was mostly lost in thoughts of getting home so he could at least partly recover from the effects of last night before heading to the missions office. That is until his attention was caught by the conversation of two people in a narrow alley below him.

"Last night was great, but you really didn't have to walk me to work," said the brown-haired man Genma recognized as Umino Iruka, the Academy sensei who also often worked the missions desk. 'Hmm, seems I wasn't the only one to get lucky last night?' Genma used all of his ninja skills to sneak close to the edge of the roof, all the better to spy on Iruka and whoever it was that had apparently managed to seduce the chuunin.

"Ah, but I wanted to!" replied 'Bugger me! Kakashi?!' Genma's mind almost imploded. "Besides, I have to kiss you goodbye."

"You already did that when I left my place!" Iruka laughed.

"That was your 'leaving the house' kiss! This is your 'getting to work' kiss!" and Kakashi promptly delivered it. A proper tongue-kiss with groping, finished off with a tender peck on Iruka's nose and a spot of nuzzling. " Love you honey. See you at my place tonight?"

'Kakashi and Iruka? They hadn't just had sex? They were TOGETHER?!!' Genma gasped in shock.

Nothing ruins a moment quite like a choking jounin crash-landing in the middle of it.

Fortunately the impact dislodged whatever had been stuck in Genma's throat. Unfortunately it caused Kakashi and Iruka to stop kissing each other in the street.

"…" said Iruka.

"…" said Kakashi.

"You! And you!" said Genma, pointing at each of them accusingly while getting his breath back.

"Oh hell's tits," groaned Iruka. Both jounin stared at him. "What? I'm not at work and there aren't any children around. I can say that!"

"Ah Genma-san, you must have hurt your head falling off that roof. It seems you imagine…" Kakashi began.

"Give up Kashi-kun," sighed Iruka. "He knows. I have to get to school now." Iruka gave Kakashi a peck on the cheek (or on the mask to be precise). "See you later."

"But…" Kakashi got distracted by Iruka's retreating shape and forgot what he was going to say. 'Mmm, back-of-Iruka. Behind Iruka. Iruka's behind… Hey! Get out of the way!' The last thought was directed at Genma who had finally composed himself enough to get up and dust himself off, and in doing so block Kakashi's lovely view. 'Rude bastard.'

"How long has this been going on?"

"Just over two months."


"But you can't tell anyone."

"You what? Why not?"

"Because we don't want everyone knowing yet. And because you know what I could do if…" Kakashi suddenly looked at Genma strangely. "You look different. Did you get a haircut or something?"

"No and that's hardly the issue… Come to think of it, I feel different." Genma thought for a minute, and then brought his hand to his face to check. "My senbon. I must have dropped it when I fell. Help me look for it, will you? It won't have gone far."

"Use a back-up."

"That was the back-up," Genma began to look on the ground nearby. "I lost the other ones last night."

"And you didn't pick up more before you left home?"


"You haven't been home yet, have you? Again." They didn't call Kakashi a genius for nothing.

Genma just grinned.

"You're such a slut," Kakashi said mildly. He started helping Genma look for his missing weaponry.

Ten minutes later…

"Are you sure? Maybe if we look over here again…"

"Genma, it's definitely gone AWOL. Try thinking about when you last had it."

Genma thought. Then he thought some more. Then he thought the last part again, because it just couldn't have…

"Oh no. Shit!"

"Hn?" said Kakashi, looking up from his new Icha Icha.

"I'm sure I had it when I fell off the roof because I was choking on it…"

"So that's why…"

"Yes! Did you think I just fell for no reason? Fucking genins don't do that! Or maybe I decided to dive off a roof on purpose to interrupt your Icha Icha re-enactment?"

"Ok, calm down. I was only wondering. What happened to it after you fell?"

"Well, it got knocked loose when I landed. But if it didn't end up on the ground…"

"Oh, you didn't."

"…I must have swallowed it."