"YEEES!!! I WON!!! I WOOON!!!" screeched Silverstream happily, clapping her hands like an overexcited kit. Spottedleaf covered her ears and ran for cover, forgetting to pick up her clipboard.
"Silverstream… WE'RE THROUGH!!!" roared Oakheart, tears streaming down his face. A strange figure that looked somewhat like Brokenstar swooped down and nabbed him, then flew back up to brood over her ninja-ness.
Once Silverstream had stopped… squeaking… Yellowfang nervously walked up and murmured, "Erm… we're supposed to give you your nine lives now, Silverstream…"
Silverstream blinked, then mewed, "But I'm already dead… If I get nine lives, then…"
"Hm, you're right… then I don't know…"
It was in that moment that Sootfur appeared in a cloud of smoke, a comic book clutched in his paws. "Well, I should think it's obvious…" He opened the comic book to one page. "See? When the cosmic abilities of life and death are reversed, then the traditional things must be reversed as well. It's all got to do with dramatic effect, you know…"
Both cats stared at him blankly. "Um… what?" replied Silverstream.
Sootfur sighed. "Since you're dead, and people that get their nine lives are usually alive… They get them from dead people. You should get them from live people. Therefore, you get nine deaths and not nine lives…"
"GET FREAKING LIVING PEOPLE TO GIVE YOU YOUR NINE LIVES CEREMONY!!!" shrieked Sootfur before disappearing in an explosion.
Yellowfang waved away the smoke, coughed a bit, then turned to her future leader. "I guess he could be right. You do that, I've gotta go find Spottedleaf…"
Left alone and confused, Silverstream did the only thing she could do—she called Feathertail. After explaining her story to her daughter, Feathertail mewed, "Look, tell me nine living people you like."
"Um…" Silverstream tilted her head, "Graystripe, Stormfur… Oh, yeah, Mistyfoot… that's pretty much it!"
"You're more useless than Ferncloud!" cried Feathertail.
"Well, it isn't my fault I don't have any friends!" yowled Silverstream, then mewed, "Whatever happened over there in Paris, anyways?"
"Oh, Nightcloud finally caught someone, but it was Dustpelt, so she gave him to Ferncloud, then Leafpool hit her on the head with something and she blacked out… but then my sweet Crowy got himself nabbed by Ferncloud—she thought he was Spiderleg, here with Whitewing or something—and Firestar and Sandstorm are still running."
"Whaaatever. So, as you were saying?"
"Oh, right. Find yourself some more killers."
"To give you nine deaths!"
"Oh, right… um, how about Brambleclaw? He's killed cats before, he should be good at that…"
Feathertail rolled her eyes. "Mom, it's a metaphorical thing! When leaders get nine lives they don't pop out of their poor mother nine times, do they?"
"Ugh, just two of you killed me!" mewed Silverstream, frowning at the thought.
"Right… well, pick some more people!" roared Feathertail, losing her patience quickly.
"How about Leafpool? She's sympathetic to my cause… Oh, and Firestar! I gave him a life, it's only natural he should give me a death… Oh, and… SMUDGE!!!"
"Smudge? Who the heck is that?"
"I have no idea. But he'll be there. And so will Hollypaw, 'cause she's cute. And for my last choice… ASHFUR!!!"
"Ashfur? Why the heck him?"
"I'm bringing Brambleclaw, aren't I? I'm aloud entertain myself with a tom fight!"
"Okay, mom, fine…"
It was a still day in ThunderClan, more peaceful than ever before, when Silverstream and Feathertail appeared on the Highledge courtesy of Sootfur's explosive dramatic-effect-thing. Firestar gave a shriek and ducked for cover. Birchfall attached himself to Whitewing, who threw him off and slapped him. Even Jaypaw came out holding a baseball bat.
"Hey, give that back!" cried Feathertail, taking the bat from the blind apprentice.
"Attention all ThunderClanners!" roared Silverstream. "I am being chosen as new leader of StarClan, and seven of you will be present in my nine lives—er, deaths ceremony. The rest of you, shoo. And one of you grab Mistyfoot and Smudge while you're at it!"
Once the cats Silverstream didn't like had cleared out, the silver cat decided to begin without the non-ThunderClan cats… they'd just be saved for last. She and her daughter began with Graystripe, who padded forward awkwardly. "Um…" he began, "With this life—er, death—I'll give to you… the ability to rebel! Yeah! Go against that warrior code!" With that, he held up a peace sign and walked off.
"God job, Dad…" mewed Feathertail while trying not to laugh. Silverstream was too busy giving him a pointed look which occasionally drifted over to Millie.
Next up was Ashfur, who looked back and Brambleclaw and grinned. Very sure of himself, he regally announced, "With this death I give you the power to get revenge on the one who ends up with your love in the end!" He stalked back to the other cats, flashing his claws at Brambleclaw before falling silent again.
Before the next cat, Leafpool, could move a paw, Mistyfoot and Smudge were pushed in by Squirrelflight. "Hi, Silverstream!" called Mistyfoot cheerily, while Smudge let out a cry of, "WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE?!"
Regardless, he was pushed next to Firestar, hissing, "Hey, Rusty, looking good!" in his ear.
"Right. Thank you, Squirrelflight." mewed Silverstream.
Now, Leafpool continued. Shyly, she mewed, "W-With this death I give you the power to endure sadness after losing a mate…" She hung her head, and all of the other cats were silent.
"Jeez, even Crowy himself wasn't THAT corny!" cried Feathertail.
"I know, I was just acting!" replied the medicine cat cheerily before sauntering back.
"All right… next?" asked Feathertail, snickering at her enemy-turned-friend-turned-enemy-turned-possibly-friend-again.
Smudge padded up at some prodding my Firestar, and, following the other cats' lead, mewed, "Um, with this death I give you the power not to freak out if you're ever dragged into a clearing with a bunch of wild cats! …Like I was…" Confused, he walked back.
Next up was Stormfur, who promptly mewed, "With this death, mom, I give you the power of not going along with the family curse of death and capture… though you're kind of too late for that…"
Brambleclaw followed, giving Ashfur a dirty look before saying, "With this death I give you the power to get rid of pesky mate-stealing emo cats!"
Mistyfoot walked up next, meowing, "With this death I give you the power to get rid of evil cats trying to steal your deputyship!"
Lastly was Firestar who took his time before yowling, "With this death… I give you the power of strength!"
How original... Thought the StarClan cat, but she couldn't help smiling as the cats chanted, "Silverstar, Silverstar!!!"
"Niiiiiiice, mom!" mewed Feathertail.
In fact everyone was happy… except for poor Ninjastar and poor Oakheart. But who cares about them?
-END OF CHAPTER SEVEN!-
Author's note: Yes, it's going on hiatus now… D: However, it will continue… eventually…