Disclaimer: I do not own x-men and song lyrics
Lyrics - Beautiful Disaster by Kelly Clarkson
Setting: In the second x-men movie when they are camping out in the woods.
B e a u t i f u l D i s a s t e r
John + Rogue
He drowns in his dreams
An exquisite extreme I know
He's as dumb as he seems
And more heaven than a heart could hold
Everything was so quiet around him that he heard his heart beat over his labored breathing. Sweat was dripping down his back dampening his t-shirt making it slightly uncomfortable. John clung to his sleeping bag and fell back into his pillow. "Just a dream…" he said to himself as his breathing steadied.
He couldn't get the memories out of his mind; they haunted him in his sleep. Until now he could still feel the heat in the palm of his hand. He would never forget the feeling of truly letting go and using his powers. But he would never forget the look on her face.
The teachers thought he did it for show. They always thought that… John was always someone who wanted attention and did anything to get it. They couldn't be any more wrong this time.
What was he suppose to do besides protect her?
Still unable to sleep he pulled himself up into a sitting position. His shirt was still moist and laying down wasn't helping. Tugging at the back of the shirt he slipped it off and threw it in a random corner of the tent. Lucky for him he wasn't sharing a tent with anyone. He wasn't sure if he could live down someone teasing him about having a 'nightmare.' Only it they knew what he was dreaming about…
Closing his eyes he took a deep breath, thinking about who he usually thought about. Her. It was always about her, although she rarely knew it. She was usually too preoccupied with her boyfriend Bobby. It was funny how things turned out. Wasn't it him who had noticed her first? Wasn't it him who tried to impress her first not Bobby?
I'm waiting for some kind of miracle
Waited so long
She would never say his name like she said Bobby's.
She would never know how he felt about her. And was it fair? Probably not. "God…" he silently cursed to himself. "I must be thinking too much…"
Except he wasn't…That was Rogue's voice and she was calling his name. With a dubious look on his face he opened his eyes and looked at the tent's entrance. Sure enough there was a feminine silhouette crouched down near the closed zipper.
"John! I know you're awake. You could open the door you know?" Rogue said in a slightly southern accent.
Still confused he scrambled out of his sleeping bag and quickly unzipped the opening. "What? What's wrong?" he asked quickly not bothering to mask the concern in his voice. "Are you alright?"
"Yeah yeah just let me in will you?" she said pushing past him. "It's freezing…what took you so long?"
"Sorry…I didn't realize…uh…I didn't hear you…" he said zipping the tent back up quickly. He wasn't conscious of how cold it was until Rogue had barged her way in and let in the cold air.
"That's alright…" she said making herself comfortable in one of the corners. It wasn't until her eyes started to adjust to the little lighting that she realized that John was across from her…with no shirt. She also wasn't mindful of the fact she was staring…
I'm longing for love and the logical
But he's only happy hysterical
"What?" he asked not aware of his effect on her.
"Huh what?" she asked back quickly.
"God quit that," she said slightly laughing.
"What?" he asked with a lopsided smile.
"That," she said pointing an accusing finger.
"Alright alright…" he replied. He raised his arms up in defense still not conscious of the fact that his shirt was elsewhere.
She crawled over next to him and brushed her white bangs from her eyes. Again…she stayed silent but this time she just stared at the floor.
He couldn't help but let out a light laugh. He should be asking questions like 'Where is Bobby? Why did she come here?,' but ironically none of those nearly passed his mind.
"So was there a reason you came here or do you just like waking me up in the middle of the night?" he asked sarcastically.
"No!" she said lightly hitting his arm with the backside of her hand. She glanced up at him briefly only to return her eyes to the tent floor. "I just…I dunno I just wanted…to talk about today…"
He shifted in his spot and she could feel it. He was uncomfortable and his barriers were rising. She could still feel him…inside her head, it was like she knew what he was thinking it just wasn't fair to him.
"What about it?" he asked with a cocky grin. "You liked how I blew up those cop cars huh?"
She knew it was coming. Sarcasm. It was his first defense to anything and everything. If only she could reach past his wall then maybe just maybe.
She smiled somewhat giving into his jokes. Atleast let him have that she told himself. What was she even thinking being here? Here she was alone in a tent with John, with no shirt on nonetheless. What the hell was she thinking?
Oh when I don't know
I don't know what he's after
But he's so beautiful
Such a beautiful disaster
"John…I'm tying to be serious. You could have really hurt someone…" Rogue said.
"C'mon Rogue, you knew I would never let it get that far. I mean c'mon look at me," he replied.
She knew he was staring at her and she made the mistake of deciding to take a brief glance at him. There was barely any light in the tent, but she could still see his face. Her eyes traced the shadows on his face and it didn't seem that he minded her staring at him.
Her eyes locked with his and she froze – no melted. He was hot like fire, not cold like ice. Bobby had icy cold blue eyes and for some reason even though he was her boyfriend he always felt cold to her.
She never noticed the color of John's eyes. They were golden brown and it almost seemed as small embers danced around in his eyes. And that's when she noticed that he was looking at her. No he wasn't staring. He was looking at her the way that he always caught him looking at her. But this time it was different. She was looking back not trying to avoid his gaze. And she realized with that one look that he had let her in. There was no more Pyro…just John.
A tragedy with
More damage than a soul should see
She was seeing the side of him that people didn't see; the side that he didn't allow people to see. There he was John Alleryce; in front of her, and he was broken.
That's what she saw when she had touched him today. His memories still lingered in her mind almost as if they were her own. She saw a broken family. There was lies and betrayal. And he was so young when everything happened, too young, but despite that he always there to smile at her and for her. No he didn't want pity, that was the last thing he wanted. She knew things that he never wanted anyone to know. It just wasn't fair…
His voice tickled her eyes to the point where she almost shivered. He didn't take his eyes off of hers, but she could tell that his expression changed. There was concern written on his face.
"Are you okay?"
She blinked. Subtle, but it was enough to wake her up. "Yeah…Yeah I'm alright," she said trying to laugh it off.
Lord he's so beautiful
He knew that laugh. It was a laugh that said –I don't want you to know what I'm thinking or feeling so I'm just going to laugh and hope you don't question me—laugh. He smiled ever so subtly. Was Rogue picking up some of his traits?
He didn't pester her with anymore questions instead he smiled taking the opportunity in front of him. "It's alright," he said clearly laughing "You can stare all you want."
"Oh shut up!" yelled although with a playful smile on her face. She raised her arm to hit him lightly on the shoulder again when he caught her wrist in mid air.
He shook his head with a mischievous smirk. "That's not very nice. I brought you in from the freezing cold---" he was about to continue his bullshit speech but he was interrupted by pillow to his face.
"Hey! Watch it!" he said non-threateningly as he threw the pillow out of the way. He still had her wrist and his arm was quickly making its way around her waist. She let out a playful scream in between their laughter not realizing who they might have woken up. They almost didn't even realize that someone was outside their tent until it was too late. Lucky for them they did.
"Shhh!!" John quickly shushed Rogue by gently pushing her atop the sleeping bag, while turning off the lamp. He clamped his hand over her mouth using his long lost t-shirt that he miraculously found as a barrier from her skin.
Rogue tried hard to keep silent as she heard the rustling outside. She was trying hard not to laugh until she realized where she was. She was underneath a shirtless John, in his tent. Not to mention his t-shirt covering her mouth, which surprisingly smelled like smoke…like burning wood? It was a distinct scent…something that almost calmed her.
"You're gonna get me trouble you know that?" he said smiling down at her. He tossed the shirt in it's respectful corner and turned back to her to see her smiling at him.
"It's not my fault," she said innocently.
"Oh really? I distinctly remember you walking in to my tent."
"What. Is John scared of a little danger?"
John cocked his head ever so slightly at her comment. He had never seen this side of Rogue. But as soon as it arrived it left giving him no room to reply.
She shrugged and let out a small laugh. "Can you imagine what Dr.Grey would have said? Or Storm?"
"Acutally I would be more scared of what Logan would do to me."
With that they both tried to conceal their laughing, fearing they would wake anyone else.
Although when the laughter stopped neither one moved…
Rogue felt her heart beat fast not trusting herself in the situation she was in. She found herself looking into his eyes again; the same golden brown eyes that said so much to her. She just wanted to lay there, with John on top of her with the smoky scent surrounding her.
He was close now. She licked her lips as she felt his hot breath brush them.
"Yeah," she said in a sharp breath.
He's soft to the touch
But afraid at the end he breaks
He's never enough
And still leaves more than I can take
Suddenly she felt his lips press against hers. She felt his tongue graze her lips and enter her mouth. And for a moment she felt him kiss her. A moment that seemed to last much longer that it did. But then the moment became longer…and longer…She then felt him touch her. It wasn't like the touch barred by cloth. No she felt his skin on hers as he ran his hand over her stomach and pressed his hand against her back bringing her closer to him; deepening the kiss.
She exhaled sharply as his mouth left hers almost gasping for air, but all she got was smoke. It was like she couldn't breath, but she didn't want it to stop. She felt his lips on her neck and she thought that she might burst.
His touch was grazing the waist of her pants. She opened her mouth to protest but all she got was another smoky kiss.
But then she felt it. She felt him draining into her; uncontrollably, unnaturally. Something was wrong. And then it came: the flood of memories. It was like she was inside of him. Her eyes saw how he saw her. How he looked at her day by day when she was with Bobby. How he saw her the first day of school and how beautiful he thought she was. The memories were all of her, to her first day at the institute to the few minutes into the past when they were sitting in the tent.
In his eyes she was beautiful.
It was too much. She felt like she was on fire and she was choking smoke. She couldn't take it.
With all her mental and physical strength and pushed him off. She was panting and sweating with her clothes disarranged, while John was sitting at the opposite side of the tent out of breath and trying hard to sit upright.
"What do you think you were doing?!" she asked angrily.
John stared at the fuming girl before him, but all he did was smile. "Kissing you what did it feel like I was doing?"
"You could've died you know!"
"Yeah I know."
Lord he's beautiful
The pyromaniac seemed unaffected by Rogue's words because the distance between them was becoming smaller and smaller.
"What do you think you're doing?"
He positioned himself until he was atop of her like before. "I told you. I'm kissing you. What does it look like I'm doing?"
With that he didn't give her a chance to respond before he crashed his lips against hers.
And if I could hold on
Through the tears and the laughter
Would it be beautiful?
Or just a beautiful disaster