Spider Webs

Authors Note: Here is a short parody on Mary Sue fanfics. I do have to admit, that I am too, very guilty of writing several Mary Sue's; so I am really laughing at myself here- and with that being said, I do hope you will enjoy this story.

The weather could not be any more perfect that summer evening. The entire atmosphere at Hogwart's was quiet, as only the students that had nowhere to go during the summer stayed. One of these students's was a certain Marissa Cinnamon; and gosh was she pretty.

Marissa had long, long raven hair, and her eyes where most certainly the most beautiful shade of violet. She was nineteen years old, and although not the best student at Hogwart's per se, but she was most defiantly the sweetest.

On that glorious summer night, Marissa decided to leave the dreary halls of her school, and venture outside to pick some flowers. She made sure to stay far away from the Forbidden Forest, a horrible place that scared her so. As she knelt in the grass, selecting her flowers, she was sure to keep an eye on the forest's edge, lest any creatures from there might stray too far, and possibly snatch her.

It was then that the most gorgeous flower of all distracted Marissa; it was lavender-blue in color. She gasped in pleasure upon seeing it, and then reached for it, but then stopped; and gasped again, but this time not in pleasure.

There was a black spider sitting on her precious flower. Marissa was terrified of spiders. She jumped to her feet, being careful not to trip; as she was wearing high heels. She squinted at the arachnid, and saw it was now making its way off of the flower, and into the grass. She stepped back a bit, as she most certainly did not want it crawling up her leg, and up her short skirt! Interestingly, it stopped, and seemed to look up at Marissa. It then lifted one of its long, creepy, front legs, and pointed towards the Forbidden Forest, whilst holding a sign that said: "Marissa, please follow me." Then it was off, towards the forest itself.

. "It seems like that spider wants me to follow it," Marissa pondered to herself. She was so bright! She knew now why all of the male teachers made her sit in the front row-because she was so smart!

She continued to watch the spider. It stopped, and seemed to turn back, looking at Marissa. It lifted its long leg up again and pointed to the forest again. She knew for sure now that it wanted her to follow it.

Marissa bit her lip. The Forbidden Forest. She could not venture in there, she simply couldn't! She had heard horrible stories of it. And not only that, she was all alone AND wearing a skirt.

She continued to watch as the spider made its way right to the forest's edge, and then stopped, seemingly waiting for her. Marissa threw her long, silky hair back, and then, with a deep breath, began to walk towards the Forbidden Forest.

"Oh, well," she said to herself. "Maybe I'll see unicorns!"

Into the Forbidden Forest she went, following the spider, which she decided to call "Hal," just because he looked like a "Hal."

Hal led her down a very clean path, straight into the middle of the Forbidden Forest. It was getting darker and darker the further they went. It got so dark, in fact, that Marissa did not see the huge tree in front of them; the one with all the wayward branches sticking out to and fro. On her way past it, one of the lower branches accidentally caught Marissa's skirt on it, ripping it in the process.

"Oops," she blushed, and lifted the remains of her ripped skirt from the branch. Her skirt was now hanging in shreds against her curvy body, and her light green panties where exposed. She smiled a little bit at Hal, as he had stopped to stare at this whole scene. Marissa was hoping he would not get the idea to crawl up her leg now, as that's what spiders do, in case you did not know. But Hal turned around, and kept on going. He still wanted Marissa to follow him.

The strange pair only got a little but further, when Marissa got caught on another branch. This time it was her flimsy top, and now her matching bra was exposed.

"Oops," she said again, and smiled to the spider as he untangled herself once again. She giggled a little bit, feeling silly. Hal rolled all of his many spider eyes.

Again, with Marissa now half-naked, they started off, and had only gone on a little ways when she stopped again.

"Oh my gosh," she exclaimed softly. The spider looked at her questionably.

"I just realized," she said more to the air, than to Hal. "I have the special power of night vision, I could have avoided all of this," she looked down at her rip clothes.

The spider once again rolled its eyes at her, and proceeded to go on yet again. Marissa followed, now with her night vision. It was not long before they came to a very dark spot in the forest, darker than any other part. Marissa could tell this even with her night vision. Hal lowered his little spider head, and pointed in front of him. Marissa looked and squinted to where he was pointing, and stifled a scream. Before her was the great acromantula, Aragog. She looked at him in amazement. Boy, was he a big spider.

"Marissa…" the great spider began. "I need your help."

"Oh, well forgive me…eh…sir, but I am very nervous around spiders."

"I understand. But will you help me?" Aragog asked.

"Of course! I love helping people-or um, any type of creature in need."

"Very well. I need to continue to build my nest-but supplies are very, very limited." There was much sadness in the spider's voice.

"Oh, no! Whatever can I do to help?" Marissa asked, just stepping a little bit closer to the acromantula. Hal was now off to the side, flipping cards into a top hat.

"I need…" Aragog's voice was very weak.


"Your clothes."

Marissa did not hesitate. She slipped off what was left of her ripped top, and skirt. It was then she noticed there was a slight chill in the air that night; she shivered a bit.

"Come closer," the spider beckoned to Marissa. "Bring me your clothes."

Marissa stepped forward, as to where she was close enough to hand her garments to the acromantula. She smiled at him; she could feel her nervousness fading a way. She was beginning to feel a connection with Aragog, and she did not know why. The creature tossed the items of clothing she had given him, into a cardboard box that was marked: stuff.

"Thank you ever so much, now I will be able to build a big strong nest because of you."

The girl pulled her long hair into ponytails, and tugged on each one, giggling, as she stood there, clad only in her light green bra and underwear.

"You can call me Marissa."


She then did something that surprised the wise spider-but not too much. She went to him, and began to pat his large, fuzzy head. His legs twitched a bit; in response to her light touch.

"Oh, my big spider-I think I love you. But why?" Marissa asked herself, looking to the beautiful stars above her.

Aragog was silent; he just enjoyed Marissa's caresses.

"A little to the left."

Just then, something horrible happened: you-know-who appeared. And he had glow sticks! If it were not for those glow sticks, Marissa never would have been able to spot him and save the say. Or maybe she could, because she DID have night vision after all.

"It's him!" Marissa gasped, and pointed to the evil man. And with that, she flung her arms around Aragog.

"Our love is what keeps us strong-nobody can hurt us as long as we have each other!" Marissa began to weep into the spider's fuzzy body.

At that, Lord Voldemort threw down his glow sticks, and ran off. Love had conquered all again!

"And it took less than thirty seconds," Marissa remarked.

"Marissa," said Aragog. "Will you….marry me?"

Marissa held back tears. "Yes!"

And marry they did. And they lived happily ever after, until Marissa could not put up with the "sticky web stuff everywhere" thing anymore.