A/N: BiteMeTechie's "100 Starting Lines" from the WPBA forum, Line #090: Do something! Anything! Please!

A/N2: I think you can figure out who's talking for each line. They're all (somewhat) in-character, so that should make it slightly easier.

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"Do something! Anything! Please!"

"Aw, come on Rodney, she's so cute!"

"Hah, and I'm sure 'cute' is a pre-requisite course at the Academy of Evil!"

". . . Rodney, she's three."

"So! Three is the perfect age for kids, it's just when they're small enough that you let down your guard, and then wham!"

"Wham?"

"Wham. Like swatting a fly with a Buick."

"Uh hunh. Interesting simile."

"It is, isn't it? I come up with some quite brilliant – ack! No! Don't touch that!"

"Lighten up, McKay, she's just having fun."

"Oh, sure, Conan, go ahead and protect the little she-demon, but I'm not fooled by the 'innocent puppy' look. And you, yes you, you little minx, you go right ahead and hide behind those questionable dreadlocks, I'm keeping both eyes on you until we get out of my lab!"

"Doctor McKay, I am sure that she means no harm. She is only curious."

"And of course you stick up for her, that's the whole 'motherly instinct' thing kicking in. God, am I the only one in this room that sees that . . . thing as a threat! Oh, oh no, no, don't let her near me, she's probably got all sorts of awful germs and – no! Stay away! Please! Sheppard! Keep her away from me! Ronon! Teyla! Help! She's getting closer! She's­­ . . . she's–!"

"Unca Rodey!"

-silence-

"She's . . . just so darn cute!"

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A/N: And there you have it, this week's bit of pointless drivel. Although, I must admit, the "swatting a fly with a Buick" remark was -winces- not mine. I stole it with humor aforethought from Jim Davis and the Garfield™ industry. Dammit! I wish I could be funny on my own . . . sigh . . .