Summary & A/N: This story may seem a bit confusing at first, I'll be going back and forth between life in Stars Hollow and life in West Virginia. This story will take place in the time frame as of Rory being a Yale graduate, Chris and Lorelai divorced and Lorelai & Luke speaking, but certainly not pointed in any clear direction; especially when it comes to a love life. Now that Rory is moving away from Connecticut, Lorelai feels incredibly lonesome. Her dreams of getting married and having another baby have vanished, but there's hope again when she considers adoption. Also, there may be some conflicting religious views used in this story (Christianity and the Bible Belt) I hope everyone can look passed that and appreciate the writing.
(Red Hawk, West Virginia: Summer of 2007)
"Cheyenne, don't make me tell you again to get in this house!" Janeeva yelled from the back porch.
Cheyenne, who was sitting out under a tree in the back yard turned her head and looked at her mother, "I found a kitty, Mama!" she exclaimed with delight as she rose to her feet, picked up the small white kitten, and began walking over towards the porch.
"Sarah Cheyenne Walker, you put that filthy animal down this instant." Janeeva commanded. "Now get in this house, child. It's gonna come a storm."
"He ain't filthy." Cheyenne remarked clearly offended by the idea. "He's one of God's creatures just like us. Look at 'im Mama, ain't he cute?" Cheyenne held up the kitten; it let out a weak meow. "I bet he's hungry."
"Cheyenne, no." Janeeva's voice was stern and hard. "It'd just be another mouth to feed. We can't afford to take care of no cat."
"But, Mama… I'd…" Cheyenne began to protest.
"I said no!" Janeeva reared back her hand prepared to hit the child.
Cheyenne quickly dropped the kitten. It landed hard on the ground and made a whimpering noise as it tried to raise back to it's feet. It stumbled several times in it's attempt to run away.
"Oh, no!" Cheyenne cried. "I hurt 'im! I broke his leg!"
"It's fine, Cheyenne. He'll be fine." Rain drops started to fall down from the sky and a loud burst of thunder rolled through the clouds. Janeeva reached down and grabbed the girl by the arm. "Now get inside. You'll catch your death out here."
Cheyenne glanced over her shoulder at the kitten who was getting soaked out in the muddy back yard as it desperately limped away in search of shelter. The back screen door slammed shut as Cheyenne and Janeeva entered the trailer.
"Help me set up the pans." Janeeva instructed. "It's gonna leak right through this ceilin'. I don't want my floors gettin' wet."
Cheyenne sat up five different pans around the trailer to catch the dripping water. Janeeva came back into the kitchen and began cutting up onions and tomatoes which they'd grown in a small garden in their backyard.
"I bought some soup beans today." Janeeva replied. "Don't think you get to eat like a pig though. We have'ta make 'em last us all week."
Cheyenne took a seat at the table. "Did you know, Mama, that Jesus once fed all kinds of folks on just a lil' bit of fish and bread?" Cheyenne smiled proudly over her knowledge.
"Well, I ain't Jesus." Janeeva replied as she continued to chop the tomatoes. "These beans ain't gonna last us all week if we ain't careful."
Cheyenne sighed and laid her head down across her arms on the table. Her mother was never impressed by her bible references. Cheyenne caught a ride with Mr. and Mrs. Williams every Sunday morning and went to their church. Sometimes, Janeeva never even knew Cheyenne was gone, and when Cheyenne would return, Janeeva would scold her for leaving without telling her. But you was sleepin' Mama. You say never to wake you when you sleepin'. Besides, I go every Sunday. You know that. Cheyenne's defense never pulled through however, Janeeva always replied, You don't ever leave this house, without tellin' me first. Cheyenne begged her mother several times to come to church with her, but Janeeva had better things to do than be judged and whispered about every Sunday morning.
The rain pattered down on the tin roof above their heads as Cheyenne and Janeeva slowly ate their dinner. Janeeva looked across the table and her daughter.
"You being awful quiet this evening." Janeeva spoke, right before she took a sip of her water.
Cheyenne shrugged, "Guess I got nothin' to say."
"No sense in you being upset over that cat, Cheyenne. You know good and well we can't keep a pet. If I've told you once I've told you a …"
"Hundred times…." Cheyenne finished. "I know, Mama."
"Then why do you keep bringin' home cats if you know?" Janeeva sat down her fork. "When's it gonna sink into your head?"
"I juss thought maybe you'd let me keep this un, Mama. He's so tiny and weak lookin'. I'd take good care of 'im, Mama. I swear I would! You wouldn't have to feed it or water it or anything, I'd do all that!"
"Cheyenne, it ain't the responsibility of taking care of him. It's the fact we ain't got the money. Animals need food and if they get sick they need vets. Look around, child." Janeeva waved her arms around the tiny kitchen. "We're in no shape to be takin' in anybody."
"I'd share my food with him…" Cheyenne replied in a low whisper like voice, "And if'en he did get sick, I'd take him down to Mr. Williams house. He'd know what to do."
"Well why don't you just move in with Mr. Williams?" Janeeva violently stood from the table. "Between the Williams and Jesus, that's all I ever hear you talk 'bout."
Cheyenne immediately hushed. She'd heard other people talking about the children her mother had before her. How'd she gave them each one away before they were even six months old. Why Janeeva decided to keep her, she didn't know, but she never doubted her mother's ability to one day to discard her just like the others.
"I think you'd better go get washed up and ready for bed." Janeeva replied as she tossed her dishes into the sink. "And when you get done with that, you can wash up these here dishes while I drive into town and back."
"Where ya going, Mama?" Cheyenne lifted her head and asked.
"That's none of your business child. Don't pry into my personal life." Janeeva answered as she walked over and grabbed her old leather purse from the table. "I'll be back soon, and you'd better have these dishes washed and yourself ready for bed."
(Stars Hollow, Connecticut: Summer 2007)
"Adoption? Really?" Sookie asked her voice stunned and her eyes wide open.
"Does it sound that crazy?" Lorelai inquired as she took a seat across from Sookie.
Sookie quickly looked down and focused on her cheese grading again. She shrugged her shoulders and replied, "I just never imagine… I mean…" She looked back up, "Well, it's just I thought that you'd have a baby of your own."
Lorelai sighed, but then smiled, "Yeah, I used to think so too, but now…" She paused. "Things are different now."
"Luke and I aren't together, Sookie. I – I don't know what we are." Lorelai shook her head. "Sometimes I think we're just friends… and other times I think there's possible hope of us getting back together but … Luke is hard to read. Luke is hard to figure out and I'm not sure if he'll ever be ready for the things that I want."
"Adopting a child would change your life…" Sookie noted. "It'd change everything…"
"I know that." Lorelai nodded her head. "But it'd be a good change, Sookie. I know everyone in town has this fantasy for me and Luke, but the truth is… it could never happen. I waited before… I planned an entire future around him and he backed out on me."
Sookie half laughed, "Lorelai, he didn't back out, he.. he…"
"Slowed things down… refused to take the next step…." Lorelai added. "Sookie, I want the next step. I don't want to be alone. I'm still relatively young and I have a large house just sitting there needing to be filled with love and happiness and laughter." Lorelai smiled as she finished her sentence. "It's not just that Rory's moved away from Connecticut, now… It's also about me moving on with my life."
"You've thought a lot about this." Sookie replied.
"I have. Ever since… well… ever since Luke and I broke up." Lorelai reached down and picked up her coffee cup. "I think another kid is something I need right now. I think it would fill a void that's been lingering around these last couple of years."
"Aw." Sookie smiled. "Sweetie, you're a great mother. I mean, gosh, Rory is so proud of you and you're so proud of her and any kid out there deserves to have you as a mom."
"Thank you, Sookie."
"I mean it. I guess you're right about everyone having this fantasy for you and Luke. I'm guilty of it too. But damn it, you two seem so perfect for each other."
"Well, if it's meant to be, then it'll happen. I can't wait any longer. I can't try to plan a life that doesn't exist. Adoption… Adoption is something that's real and something I can plan for… I want to do this, Sookie. I really do."
"Hey, you've got my support." Sookie replied, she looked down at her growing stomach, "Jackson and I are big fans of babies."
Lorelai laughed, "That I do not doubt."
"So, you're gonna start the process soon?" Sookie asked eagerly.
"Yes. Soon." Lorelai replied. "I'm going to meet with some adoption counselor next Monday."
"Wow… that is soon."
"It's a good thing, Sookie. It's a very good thing. I'm not only making the life of a less fortunate child better, but I'm enriching my own life all over again."