A/N: Just a dorky little oneshot I've had inside my head forever. It might be hard to follow, but just give it a try.


Dark room. Rain outside; not torrential, but considerably more than drizzle. Two dim streetlights are the only source of illumination. Windows open an inch or two. Room cool and warm at the same time. Bed soft, skin softer. Lips, teeth, tongue, hands, sweat, heat, panting, moans, thrashing…

Bump.

"Ow!"

Two forms split into one; bodies emerge from beneath sheets. One is pressing a hand to the back of the head.

"What, what's wrong?"

"My head—it hit something—ooowww…"

"You okay?"

"I just cracked my fucking skull, how okay do you think I am?"

"Jesus, Ang, calm down, I'm just trying to help."

"Sorry, sorry…it just really kills."

"What'd you hit it on?"

"Dunno…felt like the corner of something."

"Of what?"

"I said something, I don't know."

Hands shuffling across pillows and sheets, searching. A cry of triumph.

"Found it!"

"Found what?"

"I…I think it's a book."

"A book?"

"A book. Can't see the cover too well…looks like there are legs on it, and—and what the hell are you doing reading a book called How to Kiss With the Lips between Your Hips?"

"Mimi…I'm going to kill her, I swear to god! She was over here earlier…how'd we miss that all this time?"

"Might have been under the pillow."

"I will rip her limb from limb, that little…bad enough she's reading this, leaving it around for people to randomly smack their heads on, that's just evil!"

"I may be wrong, but do you really think she meant to do this?"

"Oh, shut up, Collins, that's not the point."

"Shit, you're crabby."

"Arrrrrgh, I'm sorry again. I just get mad about stuff like severe head pain when I'm enjoying some of the best…you know, that I've had in a long time."

"Well, can I help you feel better? Say the word…and I'm at your service."

"I might be able to think of something."

"Splendid."

Two silhouettes merge together, slip down under the covers. Giggles, squeals, growls…then a quick intake of breath and moans. Lightning flashes and thunder rolls; so do the sheets.