A/N: Alrighty, this is odd. It is the product of me thinking about IM-ing and the Star Wars universe. I provide a key to the characters at the end.

Disclaimer: No one is mine, although their names are.

blondie27: IM-ing is such a dumb way to communicate! It's inconvenient, costly, and moronic because how much energy does it take to walk across the room to talk to someone? I HATE IM-ing.

hotace: Oh, look! He hates something! So, what else is new?

BactaDerrick: Not that.

hotace: Oh, shut up.

Fondor University: Yeah, shut up Hobbie.

blondie27: And I HATE THIS penname! Hey!! Why the is this starring out all my obscenities?! Every one!

hotace: I did that to protect my virgin ears.

Fondor University: Wow, I HIGHLY DOUBT anything about you could be described as virgin.

BactaDerrick: I like your name.

Fondor University: Glad you get it.

hotace: He doesn't like your name; he likes you!

BactaDerrick: Shut up!

blondie27: WES! Can you explain our names already!

hotace: Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

Didn't say the magic word!

blondie27: PLEASE! PLEASE you !

hotace: Ok! So, you're "blondie27" because you're blond.

blondie27: Why 27?

hotace: Well, I was gunna have it be 21, but—

blondie27:

blondie27 signed off at sometime

Fondor University: Congrats, moron.

BactaDerrick: Isn't it supposed to tell the actual time?

hotace: I fiddled a little, but anyways…names! So your name is Derek, obviously, and I think there's such thing as a water derrick, so…yeah.

Fondor University: I would like an explanation of your name, Wes.

hotace: Well, my dear, I thought that would be obvious.

TheMasterofAllPilots: Ha. Ok, so who gave me this dumb name?! I may be the commander of the Rogues but none of you actually listen to me!

hotace: Wedge! And your name is sooooo not dumb.

TheMasterofAllPilots: Sure. Well, I'm only here to ask where Luke is.

hotace: And?

TheMasterofAllPilots: So, where is Luke?

farmboy: Was someone looking for me?

hotace: No.

TheMasterofAllPilots: Yes!

BactaDerrick: Maybe.

hotace: You're still here?

BactaDerrick: Yes.

Fondor University: My God, you guys are stupid.

Fondor University signed off at sometime

MusicLover: Hello, is Wes on? I have a bone to pick with him!

hotace: Hey! You changed your name!!

TheMasterofAllPilots: There's a way to do that? Dllr, please tell me how!

hotace: But the name!

MusicLover: I did not think that "Small Vowelly Challenged One" was particularly flattering.

TheMasterofAllPilots: PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ClosetRedhead: Captain, groveling really isn't very manly.

hotace: You changed your name, too!

ClosetRedhead: Dllr showed me how.

TheMasterofAllPilots: Cummon, Dllr, I am your commanding officer…(hint hint)

BactaDerrick: Please tell me, too. I HATE the name Derek!

hotace: Take the issue up with your mother, not me.

BactaDerrick: Actually, I was talking to Dllr.

MusicLover: It's more fun to watch you two writhe…but I'll give you a hint: Rosebud.

TheMasterofAllPilots: Rosebud? It that really a clue?

MusicLover: No.

ClosetRedhead: If you guys changed your names, what would they be?

TheMasterofAllPilots: Hero of All Corellia or something like that…

BactaDerrick: God.

ClosetRedhead: Ok, let's NOT tell them how.

farmboy: Ok, Wedge, what did you want?

hotace: You're still here?

farmboy: Yes.

TheMasterofAllPilots: I don't actually remember…Only here's something for you to do: could you get Tycho back on here? SOMEONE owes him an apology.

hotace: Jeez…

farmboy: Sure! Be right back!

Fondor University: Are you losers still on here?

ClosetRedhead: Plourr?

Fondor University: That's me.

hotace: Who's a loser?

Remember me?: Plourr, Elscol? Mirax has a message for you.

SmugglerGal: Do you two guys want to join me and Winter in Downtime? Without the boys?

ClosetRedhead: ANY day!

ClosetRedhead signed off at sometime

Remember me? signed off at sometime

SmugglerGal signed off at sometime

Fondor University signed off at sometime

MusicLover: Well, there go the women.

farmboy: I found Tycho.

blondie27: Hi.

TheMasterofAllPilots: Well, Wes…?

hotace: Yeah, um, sorryaboutthewhole21thingbutIobviouslydidn'tputitinthenamesoreallywhat'stheproblemandWedgeisanevildictator.

TheMasterofAllPilots: I heard that!

farmboy: FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!

blondie27 signed off at sometime

TheMasterofAllPilots signed off at sometime

hotace signed off at sometime

BactaDerrick: You weren't quite so fun back when you were with the Rogues.

farmboy: I don't have to take care of you guys anymore! It takes a weight off my mind.

A/N: Ok, here's the list.

blondie27: Tycho Celchu

hotace: Wes Janson

BactaDerrick: Hobbie Klivian

Fondor University: Plourr Ilo

TheMasterofAllPilots: Wedge Antilles

farmboy: Luke Skywalker

ClosetRedhead: Elscol Loro

MusicLover: Dllr Nep

Remember me?: Winter

SmugglerGal: Mirax Terrick