Author's Notes: Ok, this is my first fanfiction. Ever. LMFAO, this feel so WEIRD. Okay, moving on…this is a fanfic that deals with alcholism, cutting, but don't worry: I'm not going to go into extreme depth. In fact, there is barely any mention if it…it's just there...well, there is…but it's not the focus of this fic. There will be poems in it. ) I've never actually done this before (gasp!) so reviews and suggestions would be nice. This is going to be rated T…because I am and I wrote it. If you think I need to change the rating, just tell me, because this one time I watched an R rated movie and I thought it was PG…ok, moving on…

Disclaimer: I do not own POT. I do, however, own story lines, poems, and OCs.. I think…

Chapter One: View From the Window

I never know what I want

I never know what I need

Slowly, im being cut up

And im starting to really bleed

I don't know what I want

Or if I want my friends near

My life is spinning round and round

I'm questioning what's dear

I don't know if I want to hope

Or if "love" is real

You can call me crazy

But I'm forgetting how to feel

Sadness can't be eternal

And we know that love can end

But pain just isn't flexible

It cannot twist or bend

I'm scarred, cut up, and bleeding

With deep spaces in my heart

But I'm not the only one

And the healing has to start

Kirihara Akaya looked down at his poem. It described how he felt perfectly. To the point where it was scary. He sighed and then crumpled it up. It didn't really matter how he felt; hadn't he decided that long ago? It was better this way, he remindede himself, and closed his eyes and let his breath out slowly. If you couldn't feel, you couldn't get hurt.

The next day, Akaya's poem was sitting forgotten in his garbage can in his room, suffocated by the rolls of used grip tape and used water bottles he had thrown carelessly on top of it.

Please Review! I need to know if it's any good. I think the poem's okay…not great, but there will be better ones…lol, it's 5 am and I've already had too much coffee. Well..wait what did you sat? For every review I get, I update a day early? And you canwrite whatever you want, even if it's all bad comments? Ok, we have a deal! Good, now go click that button right there and tell me what you think!

LoveableDuck 3