Summery: In which, the Akatsuki must perform an embarrassing ritual they know all too well.

Disclaimer: This product is meant for entertainment purposes only. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. Some assembly required. Batteries not included. Use only as directed.

A/N: Complete crack. No warnings, except perhaps a Stupid!Tobi.


"He's late." Deidara complained, sighing loudly where he stood with the rest of the Akatsuki members in the dark chamber, mumbling something under his breath about the indignity of being called out of bed in the middle of the night by egotistic psychopaths.

Sasori grumbled in agreement, looking to Itachi, who had his arms crossed over his chest - the only indication the Uchiha gave of his own irritation. Kisame merely looked bored, shuffling his feet impatiently against the cold stone floor.

"He's coming!" Tobi exclaimed suddenly, as he moved hastily from the door where he had been keeping watch and took his place in the line of S-Class criminals, shoving Hidan a little to make room.

Sir Leader's steps could be heard echoing through the cavernous chamber as he approached the door, and at the first glimpse of blood-red eyes, familiar music drifted from some unseen place in the darkness, while they began to sing.

"Da-na-na-na-na-na-na-na, Lea-der!" They all chorused, much to Sir Leader's apparent glee, as he strutted into the room, the music growing in volume the closer he came.

"Lea-der!" They sang loudly, faces stonily serious, then quieter; "Lea-der..."

The all-too-familiar theme consumed the air around them, as a very pleased Sir Leader walked proudly to his throne in the centre of the unlit chamber, grinning proudly as the music reached it's crescendo, and the Akatsuki missing-nin were forced once again to complete the embarrassing daily ritual.

"Da-na-na-na-na-na-na-na, Lea-der!"

Deidara was quivering with suppressed disgust, Itachi's eyes were clenched tightly shut, and Kakuzu nearly puked right then and there - but Zetsu smacked him soberingly on the back, luckily in time with the music, and they continued. The only one seeming to enjoy the humiliating charade, was Tobi, who struck a distinctive pose as the last notes of the song finally reached them.

"Lea-der! Lea-der!" They finished, breathing a sigh of relief.

"Bat-man! Er, I mean, Lea-der!" Tobi concluded, gleefully.

Sir Leader nodded approval at his subordinates. 'I am fantastic, aren't I?' He thought, smiling in the shadows.