One day on the Great Fox, the Starfox was enjoying a week of absolutely no jobs. Fox was relaxing on the couch, Falco and Slippy were playing video games, Krystal was reading an anonymous book, Tricky was watching Star Trek, Kirby was eating anonymous food, and Link was preparing for something. Since Fox, Link, and Kirby were in the room alone, they decided to talk. The subject was centered on what Link was preparing for.
"Link, why do you have to prepare for this?" said Fox "I mean, the King of Hyrule has all the supplies, right?"
"Nonsense, Fox" said Link "I must be prepared to bring my own supplies"
"Yeah, but, you go on this prank raid with the King of Hyrule every three weeks" said Fox "You should know that you already had the supplies by default"
"Do not be silly, Fox" said Link "I will go with my own utensils"
Link started packing some more.
"Ah, yes, I was going to ask you" said Link "You and Kirby know about what happens, I wish to ask if you would like to join me in our prank raid"
"Count me in!" said Kirby "I want to play pranks on random people on Hyrule! Please, Link, can I go!"
"But of course, Kirby, my friend!" said Link "What about you, Fox"
"I'll pass, Link" said Fox "I'm not the kind of guy to do negative things to people"
"Oh, you're a weenie then" said Kirby, he leaned down to whisper to Link "Let's put him on our prank list"
"Listen, I'll just take you guys to Hyrule and that's it, alright?" said Fox
"Okay, Fox" said Kirby "You do know what you're missing out on, right?"
"I don't want to go, guys" said Fox
"Suit yourself" said Kirby
"Onward!" said Link "Fox, the King of Hyrule has asked for us to meet him in the Irish bar, so please, land us there"
They went down the hallway, and Krystal just walked out of her room.
"Hi, guys, where are you going?" said Krystal
"I'm just taking Link and Kirby to the Irish bar to meet the King of Hyrule" said Fox
"Oh, they're drinking again?" said Krystal
"No, we're not drinking" said Kirby
"HIGH SCORE!" Yelled Falco in the background
"We are going on a crusade with the King of Hyrule and we are meeting him there a the Irish bar" said Link
"Oh, okay" said Krystal "So, Fox, are you going on the crusade, too?"
"Nah, I think they'll do fine on their crusade" said Fox "I'll just drop them off and do whatever"
"Alright, well, I don't want to be holding you guys up, so, good luck on your crusade" said Krystal
"Farewell, Krystal" said Link "Until we meet again"
"Come on, let's go!" said Kirby
Fox, Link, and Kirby flew down to Hyrule. There, Fox landed in front of the Irish bar. There, the King of Hyrule and Zelda waited.
"Greetings, King!" said Link
"Hello, Link! So, fine to see you" said the King of Hyrule
"Greetings, Zelda, you look lovely today" said Link
"Of course, when are you leaving?" said Zelda
"I'm really excited for this 'crusade'. When are we leaving?" said Kirby
"Calm down" said the King "We will leave shortly, but now, a few drinks before we leave! On me!"
They went inside to have a few drinks; Fox and Zelda were waiting outside.
"So, what do you do when Link and the King is on their crusade" said Fox
"Look, Fox, I know it's a prank raid" said Zelda "But to answer your question, well… I just take my father's place while he's gone, and of course I have a replacement Link"
"I think I know what that is, judging by the name" said Fox
"And you're correct, too" said Zelda "What do you do?"
"Oh, I don't know, just… whatever… usually I get bored and fly around in the asteroid field and shoot some asteroids, and then I run into the star wolf, we fight, and I beat the crap out of them easily like always, without getting a dent in my arwing, then they say a few untrue words about how their better than me and they leave, I talk to myself about how much they suck, head home, and let things roll downhill from there… but that's probably not going to happen because the star wolf have jury duty so, I have no plans at all"
"Oh, alright, well, that's your problem and not mine"
Link, the King of Hyrule, and Kirby emerge from the Irish bar, drunk.
"Let us go on our… CRUSADE!" said Link
"Yeah! Let's get started!" said Kirby
"Greetings, Zelda" said Link "Would you like a good-bye kiss before I leave?"
"No!" said Zelda "Just go!"
"Ah, yes!" said Link "You may take your time"
"Alright, everyone, off we go!" said the King "Hey, Fox, you're not going to tag along are you?"
"No thanks, I have other things that I'd rather do" said Fox
"Suit yourself, weenie" said the King
They road off.
"Well, I'd better call the replacement" said Zelda
A boy with red hair and wearing Link's tunic came out of nowhere and stopped in front of them.
"Roy? You're the replacement Link?" said Fox
"Hello, Roy" said Zelda "Link's off on a crusade and…"
"Listen, Zelda" said Roy "I've got to say, I can't do this anymore" he stripped off his tunic "I quit! Find another replacement!"
"Oh, that's too bad, Zelda" said Fox
"Darn! That's the fifteenth one!" said Zelda "Now, I've got to find another one"
"Yeah, well, it's not easy being Link" said Fox "I should know, because I've been with him on his adventures"
"All the time, I know exactly what it's like to be a Link and it's not easy at all"
Zelda stared at him with a grin
"Uh… Zelda? Why are you staring at me like that?"
"Well, I need another replacement and… well… you know what it's like being Link and you have no plans at all… Well, I was just wondering…"
"Oh, no, princess, I am not going to be Link… too hard… too… Link-like. I will not be Link!"
Fox was standing in Hyrule castle wearing Link's clothes.
"I cannot believe I am being the replacement Link" said Fox
"Relax, Fox, you'll get used to it" said Zelda "Now, you will go rummage around Hyrule and do the crap Link does and when danger strikes, you know what to do"
Fox walked out of the castle and into Hyrule field.
"This is embarrassing!" said Fox "I can't just walk around like this! I'll be the laughing stock of everywhere. Well, if I'm going to be Link, I'd better be Link"
Fox went into Ordon village to start being a Link and hone his sword skills.
Meanwhile on the Great Fox:
Krystal was sitting on the couch relaxing. She was wondering why Fox hasn't come back yet.
"I wonder where Fox is" Krystal said to herself "He should be back from Hyrule by now. I wonder if he's okay"
Then, suddenly, Sonic the Hedgehog came out from behind the couch and jumped on it right next to Krystal.
"Hey, Krystal" said Sonic
"Sonic! Where'd you come from?" asked Krystal
"Air vent" said Sonic
"Hey, Krystal, have you seen Fox, Link, or Kirby anywhere, I haven't seen them"
"Well, Fox took Link and Kirby down to Hyrule to go on a crusade with the King of Hyrule, and Fox hasn't come back yet, and he should be back"
"Do you want me to call the Sonic Team and the Pokeagents?"
"No, no, no, we don't have to go through that again"
"Alright, I guess it'll be just you 'n me, then"
"I think I can find Fox by myself, thanks"
"Hey, three eyes make better results than two"
"Besides, my super sonic speed will scope out the entire planet, real easy, real quick"
"Alright, let's go find him"
Krystal and Sonic went down to Hyrule to look for Fox.
Meanwhile in Ordon:
Fox was walking through the village wondering if anything was up. He thought he could look around and find supplies that Link would use. Then, he ran into Midna. Midna stood there with her hair holding a rake and she looked up at Fox with a strange face.
"Hi, Fox" said Midna "Um… why are you dressed as Link?"
"Oh… uh, hi, Midna" said Fox "I… don't know… I thought I'd be Link"
"Why are you dressed like him?"
"Okay, okay……… don't tell anyone this… I'm a replacement Link"
"Why are you embarrassed?"
"Well… Do you know the way Link acts sometimes?"
"I don't call it 'sometimes' I say most of the time"
"I'd love to be your guide, Fox……… but, I've got some work to do…… so… anything you need help on?"
"Uh… not really, I was wondering if I could use something to sharpen my swordsmanship"
"Well, you could use a scarecrow right outside my hut"
"Okay, thanks, Midna"
Fox ran off to Midna's hut to sharpen his sword-skill.
(Okay, let's take a second to explain. If you haven't played Twilight Princess then don't read this note. Link's hut in Twilight Princess, in my stories, was really a house they found in the middle of the forest, and when they left, Midna moved in, so now you know……… Oh, and about Midna… well, too long, too complicated. She's just there, okay? No flames! Now, let's get on with our story, shall we?)
Alright you guys can read now…
Midna went her way and continued her work, something that had something to do with a rake. Little did she know that Link, Kirby, and the King of Hyrule were hiding behind a gigantic boulder. Kirby took out a large stick and used it to tape a piece of paper that said "Kick me" on her back. Midna felt it, looked back, saw nothing, and continued on without noticing what happened. Link, Kirby, and the King of Hyrule sneaked into a clearing where no one was.
"We have merged victorious with that!" said Link
"Man! Midna didn't know what hit her!" said Kirby "Yet, I kind of feel sorry for her. All those people kicking her, and she doesn't know why"
"That won't be until we're not around" said the King "now, boys, that was only the beginning of our prank raid. This is where the real fun begins!"
"Then, let's go!" said Kirby
"You won't guess what I have in store next!" said the King
They crept out of the forest.
Meanwhile in Gannondorf's castle:
"I AM GANNONDORF! AND I AM THE ANTAGONIST OF THIS STORY!" said Gannondorf with a booming voice.
Er…… the setting…… Gannondorf's throne room. Yep… chains 'n bricks. There, his henchmen (and two henchwomen) Volvogeta, Morfa, Bongo-Bongo, Majora, Komu, and Kotake, were discussing there next move.
"That you are, sir" said Majora "You're the antagonist, yet you don't have an evil plan, now"
"Yes, that is because I am waiting" said Gannondorf
"Waiting for what, Boss?" said Morfa
Gannondorf mumbled to himself.
"What did he say?" said Morfa
"I think it has something to do with you being an idiot" said Volvogeta
"What? I'm not an idiot!" said Morfa
"Well, according to the character standards, you are an idiot" said Volvogeta
"Oh, that's right" said Morfa "So, Boss, what're we going to do?"
"I don't know…" said Gannondorf
"Ooo! Ooo! Ooo!" said Morfa "How about I think for you?"
"No!" said Gannondorf "The last time that happened, we almost became one of the top 10 most stupid villains! We lost to that monkey freak that had his brain showing"
"How about we start by kidnapping Zelda like we always do" said Bongo-bongo
"Let's not get ahead of ourselves…" said Komu
"… or else we will have trouble deciding what to do next and…" said Kotake
"… Sooner or later, we would wind up with nothing and the Flk team would come in, rescue Zelda, catch us completely unarmed, defeat us, and then have us really in the top 10 stupid villains!"
"Hey, I wanted to complete the sentence!" said Kotake
"Shut up, sister! I started the sentence!" said Komu
"Oh yeah, well you're a big, stupid, ugly, bi…"
"Ladies!" said Gannondorf "Both of you shut up! I'm trying to think!"
A moblin came in with the crystal ball and said "Hallo, ist geehrter Herr, hier die Kristallkugel. Sie können es verwenden, um Inspiration für einen schlechten Plan zu finden"
"Ah, yes! The crystal ball!" said Gannondorf "Bring it forward"
The moblin pushed the table with the crystal ball to Gannondorf's throne and left.
"Let's see what we have got here" said Gannondorf "… What? … Hahahahaha! This is too funny! ……… Yes! Yes! I've got it!"
"What? What? What?" they all said
"Apparently, like I predicted, Link, Kirby, and the King of Hyrule are one another prank raid!" said Gannondorf "This means that Zelda is left in charge. So, if I kidnap her long enough and defeat the hero, I would become King of Hyrule! Now get this… when Link is on the prank raid, he has a replacement Link. This I know. But this isn't what I expected!"
"What? Tell us!" everyone said
"The replacement Link…"
"… Wait for it!"
"Wait for it!!!"
"Who's the freakin replacement!?!" said Volvogeta
"The replacement is Fox McCloud!" said Gannondorf
"Awwwww" everyone said in disappointment
"Boss, may I remind you that Fox McCloud is the current wielder of the triforce of wisdom?" said Majora
"Yes" said Gannondorf "So?"
"So, you don't have the triforce of power any more, Kirby does. Fox has a triforce, giving him a greater chance of him beating us" said Majora
"Still, I am powerful enough to defeat him" said Gannondorf "He is nothing compared to me, without his comrades, Link and Kirby, the other wielders of the triforce, he is useless!"
"Oh, boy, here we go" said Volvogeta "Prejudging the competition again"
"WOOHOO! Go, Boss! That plan will work" said Morfa
"Morfa" said Gannondorf "You still have that brown on your nose"
"Really? I thought I got it off" said Morfa
"Hey! Moblin! You! Whoever you are" said Gannondorf
The moblin came into the room
"Get an army to go in and capture Zelda again" said Gannondorf "I've got a plan brewing"
"Ja, Sir" said the moblin
The moblin left to get an army of moblins to once again capture Zelda.
"Now, I need some volunteers to slow down Fox" said Gannondorf
"Ooo! Ooo! Ooo!" said Morfa "Pick me! Pick me!"
"Alright, Morfa" said Gannondorf
"I'll take down that furball!" said Bongo-Bongo
"Alright, Bongo-Bongo" said Gannondorf
"I, too, will go!" said Majora
"Alright, Majora" said Gannondorf "Okay, we're all set then! Now, let's make some voodoo!"
"What?" said Morfa
"You know, it's phrased 'let's make some magic' but we're evil so I said 'let's make some voodoo' because… voodoo is… evil… magic… Oh, never mind!" said Gannondorf
Morfa, Bongo-Bongo, and Majora left and spread out.
"So, who's up for Clue?" said Gannondorf "Anyone? Anyone?"
Meanwhile in Hyrule Castle:
Zelda was relaxing on the throne, wondering how Fox is doing being the replacement Link, and how Link, Kirby, and her father was doing on their prank raid. She was really bored sitting there and wished for something to happen. Then, an army of moblins barged through the door.
"Finally, something to do" said Zelda
"Aufmerksamkeit, Prinzessin Zelda, sind wir von Gannondorf gesendet worden, um Sie zu entführen. Sie sind unter Anhalten!" said a moblin
"Yeah, yeah, just take me already" said Zelda
They seized Zelda and took her to Gannondorf's tower.
Meanwhile in Ordon:
Fox was busy whacking a scarecrow with his sword that he bought from the Ordon shop. He also bought a wooden shield. As he was whacking the scarecrow, Midna came to watch his progress. Fox stopped for a second.
"Hey, Midna" said Fox "You finished with your work?"
"Almost" said Midna "I'm just taking a break. So, how are you doing?"
"Well, I think I've got the basics down" said Fox "I think that I don't really need this practice. After all, it's been peaceful lately. I think that Link, Kirby, and the King will be back from their crusade the next time there's danger, but still, you never know, so I'll do this anyway just to be sure"
Fox whacked the scarecrow a few more times and stopped.
"By the way" said Fox "I don't want to be nosy, but, what kind of work are you doing anyway?"
"Well…" Midna started to say
"HEY!" said a voice from behind
It was the post man and he was jogging to Fox as fast as he could and stopped right in front of him.
"Hello" said the postman "I have a letter from the princess to a Mr. McCloud, so, here" He gave Fox a letter and hummed a tune "Well, I'd better be off then"
He ran off.
Fox opened the letter and he, with Midna, read it. It said:
I am currently being kidnapped by moblins; I wrote this letter to you while they were taking me away. Judging by the speed of the postman, I'll already be at Gannondorf's tower. Enclosed, I have a magic map. It's a map that will mark wherever you need to go next, your current location, and the weather. Well, I'll see you at Gannondorf's tower.
Fox, took out the map and put it in his pocket. Midna stared at him.
"What?" said Fox
"Why didn't you do the thing?" said Midna
"You know. The thing that Link does when he gets an item"
"Oh no. Not that thing. I did that thing in Starfox Adventures and it really was embarrassing, and I'm not doing it again!"
"So, what are you going to do, now?"
"Well, I'm the replacement Link, so I've got to do what Link does" he raised his sword in the air "I will quest to rescue Zelda and save Hyrule!"
"Really? That's great!"
"Um… Midna, I'm new at being Link personally, so, can you be my guide?"
"Oh, I'd love to, Fox! But, I can't, I've got work to do. But, if you need my help, you know where to find me"
Fox ran off with his super speed. Then, someone sneaked up behind Midna, kicked her, and ran away. Midna looked back, but then ignored it and went to continue on.
The scarecrow looked around and gave a sigh of relieve. Then, a crow swooped down and took off his head.
Meanwhile in Hyrule Field:
Sonic and Krystal were looking around for Fox.
"If I were Fox, where would I be?" said Sonic
"I don't know, I never was Fox, and neither are you" said Krystal
"I can be Fox" said Sonic
"No, please don't"
"Hey, wait, I see something in the distance"
"What, that dust that's kicking up?"
"There's two people I know that can do that besides me, and since Hamtaro's not here, it's got to be Fox"
"It is Fox!"
"Great, let's go to him and go home"
Fox stopped in front of them.
"Hey, Sonic. Hi, Krystal" said Fox
They both looked at his clothes. Sonic started to hold in a laugh. He couldn't hold it any longer and burst into laughter.
"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Sonic laughed hysterically "Dude, what's with the getup? What are you? Some Link wannabe?"
"Fox, why are you dressed like Link?" asked Krystal
"Uh… well… it's… uh… a… long… story" said Fox
"Fox, why are you dressed like Link?" asked Krystal again
"Oh, fine, Zelda forced me to be the replacement Link" said Fox
"Replacement?!?" said Sonic laughing
"Yeah, and I'm kind of busy right now, so, please, go home and don't tell anyone" said Fox
"Sonic and I came here to find out what you were doing" said Krystal
"And… well… now you know" said Fox embarrassingly
"Hey, Fox!" said Sonic "You shouldn't be talking like that! Link doesn't talk like that!" he did a Link impression "Link talks like this. That is not the way to talk like Link. 'Tis an outrage!"
Sonic continued laughing.
"Krystal, please… don't… well… This is really…" said Fox
"I know, Fox" said Krystal "I understand you're embarrassed that you're temporarily taking Link's place. It's alright"
"Really?" said Fox "Well, I don't think Sonic thinks the same way"
"Well, you can't blame him" said Krystal
"I know, I know. Sonic's just that way" said Fox "You promise not to tell anyone?"
"We promise, right, Sonic?" said Krystal
"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Sonic laughed continuously "Who would want to be Link? GAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I'm… I'm… I'm… someone help I'm gonna burst a gut!"
"SONIC!" said Krystal
"Alright! Alright! Alright! I promise" said Sonic calming down
"Good" said Fox "Right now this map says I should go to Hyrule Castle. I should get going now"
"Okay, Fox, I'll be in the market town to see what I can do to help" said Krystal
"You two do whatever the crap you want to do" said Sonic "I'm going to Ordon. See ya!"
Sonic sped off to Ordon. Fox carried Krystal to the Market which was on the way to Hyrule castle.
Meanwhile in Lon Lon Ranch:
Link, Kirby, and the King of Hyrule were readying their next prank.
"'Tis complete!" said Link
"Yeah! Malon won't know what'll hit her!" said Kirby
"As soon as she comes in, we'll jump behind one of the stables" said the King
Kirby took a look out the window and saw Malon.
"She's coming this way! Everyone hide!" said Kirby
They all jumped in the stable and watched the door open. Malon walked in and said "HOOOOOwee! That sure was a heckova hastle. 'wonder how the horses 'r doin'"
She opened the door all the way and a bucket of raw cow milk fell on her head. She wobbled back trying to get the bucket off. She accidentally whacked a horse. She lifted the bucket off her head and the horse neighed and kicked her with it's hind legs, and she flew into a pile of manure. As she lifted her head and spit some manure out, Link, Kirby, and the King laughed hysterically. Malon looked back and they ran away before she saw them.
Meanwhile in Gannondorf's Tower:
A moblin sent Zelda in Gannondorf's throne room where Gannondorf sat.
"Zelda, wonderful to see you again" said Gannondorf
"Hello, again, Gannondork!" said Zelda "Pleasant to see your hideous face once in a while"
"Well, Princess, as you can see, I have a chance of winning. You see, without Link or Kirby, Fox is useless, and is currently the only one who should beat me. And if he fails, you have no choice but to give the Hylean throne to me"
"Prejudging the competition, again, eh, Gannondork?"
"That's what I said!" said Volvogeta walking down the hallway
"Anyway, we should know who is the future king of this planet" said Gannondorf
"Not you" said Zelda
"We'll see. Take her away"
The moblin dragged Zelda away to the prison.
"I've got a nice challenge for Fox McCloud, and this won't be easy!" said Gannondorf to himself
Meanwhile in Ordon:
Sonic was walking about to see what he could do. Then, he spotted Midna raking the river.
"Hey, Midna" said Sonic
"Hi, Sonic" said Midna
"Uh… what are you doing?" said Sonic
"Oh, I'm raking the river"
"Raking the river? Why?"
"Well, you know how the water gets all rippled, well, I thought it was because of the current, like everyone else did, until Falco came and told me that it's not good if the river is rippling, so he told me I had to rake it"
"Okay, Midna, you were right in the first place. The river ripples because of the current. Falco is trying to get you to do something stupid. So, there's no point in raking the river"
Midna tossed the rake over her shoulder accidentally hitting someone on the head, thus knocking him out.
"So, how are things here?" Sonic asked
"Oh, fine. The goats still hate me and ram into me every time they see me" said Midna
Someone walked by, kicked Midna, and ran away.
"Speaking of which, for some odd reason, everyone's been kicking me lately" said Midna
Ilia came along.
"Hi, Sonic, hi, Midna" said Ilia
"Hey, Ilea" said Sonic.
Midna looked back and said "Hi, Ilia"
Sonic noticed the kick me sign on her back, and well, started kicking her.
"Sonic, why are you kicking me?" said Midna
"I can't help it" said Sonic "Sorry"
Ilia noticed the sign on her back, took it off, Sonic started kicking her, put it on the tree, and Sonic started kicking the tree. Midna saw the sign.
"Wait, that sign was on my back?" said Midna "Then why does it say……… Oh, that's why everyone was kicking me! Thanks, Ilia"
"It's alright, Midna" said Ilia
Sonic stopped kicking the tree to get his leg a rest.
"Hey, Midna" said Sonic "Did you see Fox?"
"Yes, I did" said Midna
"Isn't it hilarious?" said Sonic
"What's hilarious?" said Midna
"You don't get it, do you?" said Sonic
"About Fox being the replacement Link?" said Midna
"What's so funny about it?"
"I found it hilarious"
They got up and walked away. Ilia sat there alone.
"Of course" said Ilia "Just come in for a brief moment, forget about me, and leave like I'm not here. Just like every time"
They walked to Midna's hut, Sonic noticed the scarecrow had no head on.
"I can tell Fox has been practicing his swords skills" said Sonic
"How can you tell?" asked Midna
"The head's gone"
"That's strange, he was practicing here, but the head was still on when he left"
"Then why's the head missing?"
Then, the head of the scarecrow (Which is a pumpkin for those of you who haven't played Twilight Princess) fell from a tree and splattered on Sonic's head.
"Hey, there it is!" said Midna
Then two crows perched on the scarecrow and one of them laughed at Sonic.
"Why you!" said Sonic racing to catch one of the birds.
The crows flew up and pecked Sonic twice, then one of them laughed and they both flew away.
"Someday, I will get those crows!" said Sonic
"Well, Sonic, now what?" said Midna
"I'm going after those crows!" said Sonic "I'll show them what happens when they mess with Sonic the Hedgehog!"
"Can I come?" said Midna "I just realized that my work is stupid and is something to fool me"
"Sure, let's go, Midna!"
Midna held on to Sonic and they raced out of Ordon to go after the crows.
(Geez, I've got more than one subplot! Kind of like Seinfeld)
Meanwhile in Hyrule Castle:
Fox was scoping out some clues and found something. It was a piece of metal and a note that said:
"To Fox McCloud, you have just found a piece of the key that unlocks the door to Gannondorf's Tower. To find the other keys you have to go to the temples of water, shadow, and time. You have unlimited time to save Zelda, hurry!
P.S: Boss, says I can't give you any information……… Wait! I wasn't supposed to write this note! Do me a favor and forget what this note says and throw it away!
"Morfa, I'm glad you're an idiot" Fox said to himself
Fox ran out of Hyrule Castle and ran into Krystal in the town market.
"Hey, Krystal, I found this note that Morfa accidentally wrote" said Fox "It says something about getting key pieces, I'm going to the temples that this place says to go"
"Alright, Fox" said Krystal "I'm going home, now. I've had enough adventure for one day"
"Okay, Krystal, bye" said Fox
"Fox……… Good luck, and be careful"
"Don't worry, I will"
Fox ran off.
"Oh, Fox" Krystal said to herself "He's so brave. Doing what he can to take the place of a friend. If only I could…… Oh! I'm speaking out loud, aren't I?"
Krystal walked on, but slipped on a banana peel and fell in the well. Then, Link, Kirby, and the King of Hyrule came out from behind a bush, laughing. Krystal climbed out soaking wet and glanced behind the bush, but, Link, Kirby, and the King ran off before she could see them.
Meanwhile in Lake Hylia:
Sonic and Midna were chasing the two crows. Little did they know that Link, Kirby, and the King of Hyrule were hiding behind a bush. Sonic almost caught up with the crows until he slipped on some oil slick, lost his balance, slide off a cliff, and fell in the lake.
"Sonic!" said Midna "Sonic! Are you alright? Sonic!"
Link, Kirby, and the King of Hyrule jumped from behind the bush and started laughing. Midna glanced at the bush, but, once again, Link, Kirby, and the King fled before she could see them.
Sonic washed up on a nearby shore. He spit some water out. The two crows landed in front of him and one of them laughed at him, then they pecked him. Sonic quickly tried to grab them, but they flew away. Sonic pounded the ground.
"Someday, crows! Someday!" said Sonic "I will get you someday!"
Midna came to help Sonic up and said "Sonic, are you alright?"
"Yeah, I'm fine" said Sonic
"We go after them!"
Midna grabbed onto Sonic and they chased after the crows.
Then, Fox came along to the river shore and looked at his map. He saw three x's on them.
"Okay, first, I'll go to the water temple which should be in Lake Hylia" Fox said to himself "Well, here I go"
Fox put on an oxygen device on his mouth, dove into the water, and swam deeper into lake Hylia. Until he reached the water temple.
Meanwhile in Gannondorf's castle:
Gannondorf was on his throne with his crystal ball.
"Morfa, Morfa" said Gannondorf
"Yes, Boss?" said Morfa through the crystal ball
"Fox McCloud is heading your way, you do know what you're doing, right?"
"Of course I do, Boss!" said Morfa "I've got a secret weapon for him"
"Good, continue on!" said Gannondorf "Someone bring be some moblin muffins!"
Meanwhile in the water temple:
Fox was swimming through, until he reached the surface. Fox took off his oxygen device and swam out of the water.
"Okay, Fox, what would Link do? What would Link do?" Fox said to himself "Okay, what would I do? What would I do?"
Fox decided what to do and started going………
Alright folks, here's the thing, I'm not going to kill myself, meaning I'm going to skip to the part where Fox gets to the Boss (We all know how long these temples take). So, if you want to know about how Fox got through this temple, then go recall how Link got through the water temple in Ocarina of Time except without the Ruto scene. Okay, let's go.
Fox finally got through the temple. He used the big key to unlock the door. He walked inside. It was a large room with a thick glass floor, with water underneath. Fox looked around.
"Alright, Morfa, I know you're here" said Fox
There was a large thoom! The room shook every two seconds. Then, a large black rancor-like beast (rancor from star wars) that had a ditch on it's forehead. It roared loudly.
"Oh, boy, that is not Morfa" said Fox he searched his pockets for something and said "Crap! Why didn't I bring my blaster?"
The beast roared in his face. Fox looked at the beast briefly and that ditch looked suspicious. The beast swiped at him and Fox ran. He used his super speed and did a spin attack on it, but it did no damage. He tried aiming for the forehead, but it knocked him away.
"If I'm going to beat that thing, I'm going to have to hit it at a distance" Fox thought to himself.
Then he remembered he bought bow and arrows while in Ordon. He got it out and fired at the beast's forehead a few times. Then, a force field came up in front of the forehead.
"Great, now what?" Fox thought to himself "Maybe I can hit it at an angle"
Fox ran to the side of the beast and fired his bow and arrow at it. It went behind the force field and hit his forehead. The beast fell to the ground. Fox got out his sword and sliced it until it died.
"Yes! I did it! Now where's that Key piece" said Fox
Then, the floor crashed open, it was Morfa!
"HAHA! I got you, Fox McCloud!" said Morfa "Now, I will destroy you! And if you defeat me, I'll give you the key piece"
Fox had no time because of how long this story is taking so he got out a cookie that he ironically kept in his pocket.
"How about I trade you this cookie for the key piece?" said Fox
"Deal!" said Morfa
Morfa tossed him the key piece and Fox tossed him the cookie. Morfa ate the cookie and said "So long, sucker!"
Fox got the key piece and put it in his pocket.
"Just two more to go" said Fox.
Fox sped out of the temple and surfaced Lake Hylia.
Meanwhile in Kakariko village:
Link, Kirby, and the King were at it again. They set up their trap and hid on the roof-top of Impa's house. They were eyeing the red-headed girl who watched the cuckoos in their pin connected to Impa's house. Link cocked an arrow and fired at one cuckoo: Nothing. He fired again: Nothing. He fired again: The cuckoo cooed in the air. Link, Kirby, and the King of Hyrule ducked down. Cuckoos started attacking the girl. She noted this and ran.
"RUN!" yelled the girl "CUCKOOS ARE TAKING OVER THE WORLD!"
After hours of mass destruction caused by the cuckoos, the nonsense died down, and everyone was injured except Link, Kirby, and the King, who jumped down from the house and laughed. The red-haired girl glanced behind and Link, Kirby, and the King of Hyrule left before she saw them.
Five minuets passed, the people of Kakariko village were fixing the damage, when Sonic sped through with Midna riding him. They were both chasing the crows again.
Midna looked around and said "Wow, what happened here?"
Sonic didn't hear her, for he was far to focused on catching those crows. They cased them into the graveyard. Sonic finally stopped to look around. A cold dead chill filled the atmosphere.
Midna sunk behind Sonic and said "Gosh, it's really scary here"
"No doubt" said Sonic "Graveyards are where dead people are buried"
"I know that. B-but it's still scary" said Midna
"Man, you're right. Let's get out of here"
Sonic started to leave, but he spotted the crows on a gravestone. Knowing that it was his chance, he tried to outsmart the crows, he took a few steps out of the graveyard, quickly turned around and, at full speed, burst to the crows. Unfortunately, he tripped on a rock and flew right into the gravestone, and it knocked the gravestone back and Sonic fell into the hole under it. Midna ran to the hole to see if Sonic was alright.
"Sonic!" Midna yelled down the hole "Are you okay?"
Sonic reacted to her by climbing out of the hole, the top half of him was out, the bottom half was dug into the wall for support. Sonic put his arm on the ground, and his other hand on his cheek and rested his elbow on the ground. The crows landed next to him and one of them laughed, and pecked him twice. Sonic tried to grab it, but they flew away.
"Sonic, should we give up?" said Midna
"No, but a break would be nice" said Sonic
Then, a voice appeared out of nowhere saying "You have disturbed the eternal sleep of the deceased! Now, the world will pay!"
Sonic got himself out of the hole. Then, re-deads emerged out from the graves. Sonic and Midna clinged onto each other and shrieked.
"Back to chasing the crows!" said Sonic
Midna climbed on Sonic and they got out of the graveyard. The re-deads started to leave the graveyard, but they were all knocked to the walls by a force. It was Fox, and he used so great a speed, that when he went through the re-deads, they were all knocked to the walls and died……… again.
Fox, unaware of what he just did, took out the map and looked.
"Okay, shadow temple" said Fox "This is where the next key piece is, well, better get moving"
Fox jumped over the walls and entered a small cave, there he saw a door. He entered the door and he was in a corridor, he went down to the edge and there was a void to his right. Fox looked across and onto the ceiling and saw a hook. Fox got out a rope and slinged it on the hook.
"Man, I can't believe I'm actually doing this" Fox said to himself "Link better thank me for this or I'm going to strangle him"
Fox jumped and swung on the robe. But instead of landing on the other side he hit the ceiling very hard. He landed on the other side with his head hanging over the void.
"Yep, he'd better thank me for this" Fox said to himself
He saw a wall with a face on it. There was a voice that said "Only the eye of truth will let you see me"
"Well, I've been here before" said Fox
He phased through the wall, for it was fake. Fox found himself in a room with a torch in the middle of it.
"Well, better get to work" said Fox
(Okay, same deal with the Water Temple, I'm going to skip)
Fox finally made it through the temple. He opened the boss door without hesitation. He was in a small room with a hole in the middle of it. Fox knew there was no sense in jumping down the hole, but, hey, he was Link. So, he jumped down the hole. An floorless pit was before him, until he reached the bottom with a loud BONG. Then, there was another BONG, and another BONG. The BONGs got more into a rhythm. Then Fox looked up and saw Bongo-Bongo.
"I got you now, Fox McCloud!" said Bongo-Bongo stopping his beats
"What? No traps?" said Fox "No monsters?"
"Why do you ask? I'm the monster!" said Bongo-Bongo
"Well, Morfa was my last boss, and well, he didn't really fight me, he just sent out a monster"
"Oh, don't mind him, he's a little numb in the brain area"
"Yeah, I can tell"
"Well, I'm here to defeat you!"
"And I'm here for that key piece"
"Oh, you want this?" Bongo-Bongo took out a key piece "If you want it you can have it" Fox tried to get it but Bongo-Bongo swiped it away "After you defeat me!"
"Okay" said Fox "Bring it!"
Bongo-Bongo turned invisible, but Fox immediately burst speed at him and swiped at him.
"OW! CRAP!" said Bongo-Bongo holding his eye "Alright, want to play smart, eh?"
Bongo-Bongo turned invisible again, and moved away before Fox attacked again.
"Dang it! I wish I had the lens of truth!" Fox thought "What did we do with the lens of truth anyway?"
Fox remembered Link accidentally switched the lens of truth with Peppy's contact lens.
"When this is over, I'm going to slap Link" Fox thought
Fox jumped out of the way from an invisible force. Then, a hand grabbed Fox, and Bongo-Bongo revealed himself.
"Not so tough, now, are ya?" Bongo-Bongo laughed.
Then, there was a buzzing in his hand. Then, Fox used a spin attack to burst out of Bongo-Bongo's hand. Then, he swiftly attacked Bongo-Bongo with a spin attack.
Fox landed on the ground and said "How about that key piece?"
"Alright, you win" said Bongo-Bongo giving Fox the key piece "I'm going home, so, don't tell Gannondorf I gave that to you, you stole it off me, okay"
"One more to go" said Fox.
He sped out of the temple.
In Hyrule field:
Sonic and Midna decided to take a coffee break and the scene skipped to when Fox entered.
Fox looked around the field and consulted to the map.
"Okay" said Fox "The next key is in the temple of time, and that must mean Majora has it, then"
He looked down and saw the key piece.
"Oh, would you look at that, there it is" said Fox "I wonder how a smart guy like Majora dropped this key right here in the open"
He picked it up and sped off to Gannondorf's castle
Meanwhile at Gannondorf's castle:
"YOU WHAT!!!!!!" Gannondorf's voice boomed down the corridor.
"I'm terribly sorry, sir, I-I'll do better, I promise" said Majora shaking.
"You are my smartest minion, Majora" said Gannondorf
"Why thank you, sir" said Majora
"But, what you did was stupid!" said Gannondorf "You dropped the key…… That's something I'd expect Morpha to do!"
"Y-y-your declassifying me as being smart as Morpha, sir" said Majora
"If you start acting like him" said Gannondorf
Morpha was staring down at Majora and said "You're as stupid as me"
"No, I'm not!"
"Yes you are"
"So what if I am?"
"… friend…" Morpha grabbed Majora and started hugging him.
"Let me go you stupid watery serpent!" said Majora.
Meanwhile at the door:
Fox tried to unlock the door, but he couldn't get in, because the chains had to be broken by a sword.
"Fool!" said Gannondorf from the top of the tower "You can't just walk in here and defeat me! You need the master sword first!"
"Master sword?!?" said Fox
"Yes, the master sword" said Gannondorf
"Come on, cut me some slack! I've had enough adventures already! I'm not going to…"
"Okay, then Hyrule will be mine, then!"
"Alright, alright! I'll get the stupid sword"
Fox sped off.
Sonic and Midna were in Hyrule field talking.
"Sonic, why did you have decaffeinated coffee?" asked Midna
"Because, you don't want to be around me when I'm hyper" said Sonic "Last time I had caffeine, I destroyed all of station's square, and that was because I had a chainsaw"
"Oh" said Midna
Suddenly those crows came out of nowhere and pecked Sonic twice and laughed.
"Why you!!!" Sonic jumped up and grabbed one
Then, Fox came out off nowhere and scared Sonic so much, he let go of the bird.
"Sonic!" said Fox
"Hi, Fox" said Midna
"Midna, what are you doing here" said Fox
"Long story" said Midna
Sonic groaned and said "For the love of… Hi, Fox, s'up?
"Listen, I need to know where the master sword is. Do you know where?" said Fox
"Uh… beat's me" said Sonic
"I know!" said Midna
"You do?" said Fox
"Yeah! The monkeys have it!"
"Monkeys!?!" said Fox
"Uh-huh, they took it and thought it was a back scratcher!" said Midna
"Don't ask me why, I don't know" said Midna
"Well, thanks for the help, I should get going" said Fox
"We should get going, too" said Sonic
They ran off.
Fox then ran to Faron woods where he saw the forest temple and he went inside to the throne room chamber. He saw the master sword sitting right there so he walked over there to get it, suddenly, all these monkeys came out of nowhere and started dancing, ready to attack. But Fox walked to the master sword, pulled it out, and walked out. Then, he went to Gannondorf's castle.
Meanwhile, Sonic and Midna were chasing the crows again.
"They went to that abandoned village, let's go!" said Sonic.
They went to the abandoned village and saw they were alone in there.
"Sonic, this place is creepy" said Midna "I've got a really bad feeling about this"
"Don't worry, Midna, we'll be done and out in no time at all" said Sonic
Then, they saw the crows perched on a building. Then, more crows came, then more and more and more and more. Soon, they were surrounded by crows.
"Uh, Sonic" said Midna "W-what are these crows doing here"
"Aw, man" said Sonic
Then all the crows attacked them.
Meanwhile in Gannondorf's castle:
Fox made it to the castle and cut down the chains. Then Fox raced through the castle, slashing enemies, unlocking puzzles, climbing staircases, then, finally, he made it to the throne room… only to find a note that said "I'm in the bathroom, please wait"
Fox waited for hours and hours, almost a day passed. Finally Gannondorf came out.
"Ah, refreshed!" said Gannondorf "Eh? Fox McCloud! So wonderful to have you here!"
"It's over, Gannondork! You lose" Said Fox
"It's not over, yet!" Said Gannondorf "You must fight me up on the top!"
Fox followed Gannondorf to the top of the castle. There they started to fight, but they were interrupted.
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIT!" said a voice from behind
It was the postman running up to Fox and Gannondorf.
"I have a letter for Mr. Gannondorf" he took out the letter and hummed a little tune "Well, I'd better be off" He ran off.
Gannondorf opened the letter and… POW! A pie splattered in his face. Then, Link, Kirby, and the King of Hyrule jumped from behind a stone, laughing.
"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" said Gannondorf angrily
"They're on a…"
"Prank raid, I know" said Gannondorf "They do the same thing to me every time"
"Oh" said Fox
"Look, I'm sick of this, just take Zelda and go" said Gannondorf
"What? But what about a fight?" said Fox
"Listen, I'm tired, I want to take a rest" said Gannondorf "Good bye"
Fox got Zelda and left the castle, they raced back to the castle.
Meanwhile in Hyrule field:
Sonic and Midna were walking through the fields. They were beaten up really bad. A crow was continuously pecking Sonic in the head. Sonic swatted at the crow, the crow laughed and flew away.
"Uh, listen, Sonic" said Midna "I'm really tired, can we please just call it a day. I want to go home now"
"Fine" said Sonic
"Bye, Sonic" said Midna.
She walked home.
Sonic was walking wondering what he was going to do next. While he was thinking, he took off his shoe, pulled out a sausage and started eating it.
Meanwhile in Hyrule castle:
"Thanks, Fox" said Zelda "I think Link and the King should be back soon so your done"
"Good!" said Fox quickly changing his clothes "I'm done with this"
"ZELDA! I'M HOME!" Yelled the King of Hyrule.
"Oh, Father, you're back from your crusade" said Zelda
"Greetings, Zelda, my love" said Link
"Hello, Link" said Zelda gravely
"Hey, boys" said the King "I had a brilliant idea. Why don't we all prank raid the entire lylat system!"
"A brilliant idea indeed, your highness" said Link
"Alright, more pranks!" said Kirby
"Let us quest, then!" said Link.
They raced off.
"Oh, looks like I need a replacement link" said Zelda
"I'll pass!" said Fox "I'm going home. Krystal and the others must be worried sick"
Fox raced off.
"Now, who's going to be my replacement link?" said Zelda
Then, she heard someone eating. She turned around and saw Sonic eating his sausage.
"Hey, Zelda, what's up?" said Sonic
Zelda stared at Sonic with a grin.
"Uh, was it something I said?" said Sonic
Sonic was standing in the middle of Hyrule field dressed as Link.
"I can't believe this!" said Sonic "This is embarrassing"
"Good luck as Link, Sonic, I'll call you when I need anything" said Zelda walking off.
Then a crow came down, pecked Sonic twice and laughed at him.
"SHUT UP, YOU!" said Sonic
(Whew! I'm tired. Take a freakin breather, ya'll! I wanted this in one chapter, but… too late! Bye) (46 pages!)